(Closed) Journey of TTC after miscarriage part 5

posted 7 years ago in TTC
Post # 241
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

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MrsFairyBee:  yes, it’s sad that it happened to both of us. We sound like we’re in similar situations, first pregnancy and first miscarriage. Can I ask – how did you know you have low progesterone? The gyno who started my misoprostol said it was something I could get checked if I had a second miscarriage, but my family dr has said he will test it for me if it would relieve some of my TTC stress. my midwife said to try right away if I wanted, the gyno said wait 3 months. I think we’re willing to wait 1 normal cycle. 

Post # 242
Member
528 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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4littlekitties:  I’m sorry that you have so many rough things going on right now. I hope things go well for your mom and you get good results back for DH and a positive appt coming up! Cute kitties. πŸ™‚

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MrsFairyBee:  So sorry you’ve found yourself here, and I hope this board offers you some comfort.  I hope your HCG is <5 at your next appointment.

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GrannyPantiesRock:  Sorry for the celiacs diagnosis–that’s rough. Good luck with the diet changes, I hope the transition is as smooth as possible!

Post # 243
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246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

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MrsFairyBee:  Welcome to the group. I’m sorry you’re here, but know that all of us sympathize. I had low progesterone (9) at 7w pregnant. My doctor though seems to think low progesterone isn’t a problem I have but that the non-viable pregnancy is what caused it to be low. After much reading, I saw people arguing both sides; it seems to be a chicken or egg dilemma. In any case, my doctor also wants to start measuring my progesterone and HCG levels on a weekly basis starting the day I find out I’m pregnant again. He said he’d prefer to have more data points and not start testing it when we run into a problem (as it would be hard to determine what my norm is).

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priyawouldntwannabeya:  Similar situation here. At 8 weeks, I found out the sacs stopped growing at 5.5 weeks. I also took misoprostol to induce the miscarriage since my body wasn’t doing anything about it. Unlike everything I read, I didn’t have any issues with the meds. It was so uneventful that I thought it hadn’t worked. Two days after my first dose, I had contractions for 3-4 hours and that was the end of it. I know how you feel; I’m worried that this will happen again too.

As for me, I got AF exactly 4 weeks after my MC. We started trying in this new cycle. But now I’m on CD21 of my second post-MC cycle without a sign of O. OPKs, temping, and the fertility monitor all indicate that absolutely nothing is going on in there. I’m super frustrated with my body and just want it to bounce back already. It has been almost 8 weeks since my miscarriage and I feel like I don’t have much more patience left in me. I just want a fresh and clean start.

Post # 244
Member
2386 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

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mojitolady:  Thank you. I hadn’t heard that about progesterone, so now I don’t feel so terrible about it. I’m sorry you haven’t bounced back yet, I hope it happens for you very soon!

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priyawouldntwannabeya:  Yes. I hope you rejoin the charters thread as well if you continue to chart. I’m morbidly curious to follow my body after this has happened to see how it reacts. Also, hoping to see it return to normal asap! After I got my first blood test they told me my HCG and progesterone were low for how far along I was. I asked for my hcg number and now wish I would have asked for the prog. number as well. But, like mojitolady said, maybe the low P was caused by the nonviable babe. Either way, I’ll be requesting close monitoring and BW each week to be sure and catch any issues we can early on next time. Fingers crossed there will be a next time and there won’t be any problems to see.

Post # 246
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2442 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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GrannyPantiesRock:  Totally… after we have our babies, we can totally be Leslie Mann in This Is 40, sneaking cigarettes out the bathroom window while wearing rubber gloves and hair scarves. Will be awesome! I’m really sorry about the celiac diagnosis. That must be really hard to adjust to – in so many ways. I went on Atkins once and I almost strangled my roommate for eating a stale bagel in front of me. But then again, I’d give up bagels for a baby any day… So hopefully this will be the change that gets you a healthy happy pregnancy. 

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4littlekitties:  Cat heart!!! I’m so sorry about your mom. This is just beyond the usual when it rains it pours territory. I agree with Granny Panties – it’s got to get better soon. Seeing a therapist is a great idea – especially when you’re in a caretaker sort of position (like with your mom, your grieving husband) cause it’s easy to feel like, “oh, I have to be strong for so and so” or “I feel bad for feeling bad when xyz has it so much worse.” Not to make it all about me, but I watched a colleague of mine die last fall and I felt really fucked up about it for a few months afterwards, but also felt like I didn’t have the right to be so traumatized because I wasn’t super close with him – but I was close with people who were super close with him, so I kept shoving down my feelings to take care of them. But therapy was a great place to get it all out – my therapist gives zero shits about anyone but me, and I pay him handsomely to get thirty minutes at a time where the only feelings I have to worry about are my own. So, long story short – yay therapy! I would definitely go for it. 

Post # 248
Member
442 posts
Helper bee

Helloooo ladies…just checking in to say hi, and welcome to the new additions…and that is all.

we’re moving house at the moment, so I’m all wrapped up in that, but will be back to properly check in soon. Had my first roll call on the July POAS s thread, but it feels a little odd. Equal parts excitement and sheer terror to POAS now for this gal! I swear I felt phantom pains in missing rightie during this first TWW…sigh. I know if be one of those who still feels an amputated limb πŸ™‚

negatory so far and on to a new cycle…

Post # 249
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

priyawouldntwannabeya:  I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope all the pain is starting to subside and you can avoid the D&C. Take it easy though and don’t push it if you don’t feel ready to go back to work next week. Give yourself some time and fingers crossed august is your month xx

MrsFairyBee: Really sorry that you find yourself here too, but welcome! Hope your getting a lot of support from your friends and family, and their at least trying to understand. We’ll all be here for you too. Sending lots of hugs xx

Post # 250
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

KatieBklyn: Yay for positive changes! and its really great that your friend can help rather than having to pay a fortune for the same advice. Hope you feel and see the benefits soon πŸ™‚  

GrannyPantiesRock:  Good luck with all your new diet too, DH is just intolerant but all his brothers are all full celiac so I can forward you some of the tastier recipes we have found if you want!

4littlekitties:  FX that DH’s BW comes back all good – You def deserve a break after the year you’ve had! Really hope your mom manages to recover quickly too and feel free to make it all about you! After having to cope with all of that I think I second Kate to go get some ‘you’ time. 

Magpie86: I’m so sorry your having a hard time too, but don’t be embarrassed at all! People really don’t get that little things really can hit you like a brick wall from nowhere and it makes the grief all so fresh again. Hope you manage to keep busy through this first TWW and I’ve got everything crossed for you that all your BDing fun is successful and you get your BFP! xxx

I’m still having quite a few occasions where I’ve had to just walk away from things before bursting into floods of tears. My best friend is due the same week as I would have been (only 4 weeks to go…) and every time I see her I can’t help but feel that I should be at the same point, with my huge belly all ready to pop – it still just kills me. I really am happy and excited for them, and she completely stepped up and has been especially supportive – but its so unbelievably hard that her little girl will always be a constant reminder of the milestones our Sophie will never reach. 

I really wish there was a different word that people could use instead of just thinking we’re ‘jealous’ as its not really that at all… 

 

Anyway on a more positive note to try and distract ourselves from all this heartbreak I’m now on CD10 and hopefully heading into our FW. So now starting to chart/ use all my opk’s and having fun BDing EOD at the mo to make sure we at least try everything we can to make this our month.

FX for you mojitolady: that our cycles get back on track and our eggs make an appearance soon! 

Post # 251
Member
528 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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mojitolady:  I’m sorry it’s taking awhile for O to come back….the frustration of waiting for your body was way harder on me than a TWW. Now that feels easy (well not quite, but easier…). I hope O comes soon!

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4littlekitties:  Good luck during your FW! Hopefully your symptoms are your body preemptively knowing it’s about to be pregnant… πŸ™‚

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Frohike:  Good luck with this upcoming cycle!

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peachcake:  Thanks so much, I really appreciate it. That must be so tough having that situation with your best friend, and I totally agree, there isn’t a word for this feeling….it’s some elements of jealousy, bigger elements of mourning, and then some elements of feeling happy for the people in your life, but guilt over not being able to be “happy enough” for them. Blah.  Good luck heading into the FW- get it girl!

Post # 252
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I had my follow up ultrasound yesterday, and while I dont have the firm result from the doctor, the ultrasound tech took pity on me and told me she didnt see anything left over from the miscarriage. Thank goodness for that! I feel back to normal enough that I went back to work a day early. I almost feel good enough to start trying again right away….but I feel like I should be listening to the drs who say to wait even though my midwife said it was ok to try again right away.

I feel like it is such an unknown. Is it ok to try right away or should I wait for a normal cycle to pass first. If I wait I can lose some weight though, and I am worried that being overweight might have been a factor in my miscarriage thanks to the insensitive gyno who opened with that immediately after saying hello πŸ™

Post # 253
Member
528 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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priyawouldntwannabeya:  Glad to hear that it looks like your miscarriage is at least physically over. I’m sorry about your jerk of a gyno, hopefully you can get a new one? That’s a pretty rude thing to open with, especially because (& someone correct me if I’m wrong) but it seems like the VAST majority of miscarriages are out of the mother’s control.

Opinions are definitely split on whether or not it’s okay to try right away or wait for a normal cycle. DH and I decided to wait one normal cycle–mainly because if I didn’t, and I got pregnant and something went wrong, I knew I’d blame myself.

Post # 255
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

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KatieBklyn:  It basically went: hello. so you know what is happening? ok. your weight. you should lose 5-10% of your weight and not ttc for 3-6 months. you should go on hormonal birth control because overweight women have high estrogen which often makes them deficient in progesterone. you should be tested for progesterone before ttc. and on, and on, and on…..as hes wrist deep shoving me full of misoprostol.

Sorry if that was too graphic. It was fairly traumatizing. He is a specialist in recurring miscarriages, but was the gyno on call that day. I went home to my DH bawling. This was my first pregnancy and my first miscarriage. My midwife said to only get things tested if I have recurring miscarriages.

I am so torn. It was not the place or the time. Very insensitive, and now my head is full of these insecuritites prior to TTC again πŸ™

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