(Closed) Journey of TTC after miscarriage part 5

posted 8 years ago in TTC
Post # 496
Member
2386 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

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desertgirl:  Oh girl I’m so sorry you’re going through this again!!! I can’t imagine after your first MC in April doing it again now. My heart aches for you. I’m so sorry.

Post # 497
Bee
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011 - Sydney, Australia

Thanks for the welcome, ladies. I’m finding it really hard to wade through pregnancy and baby stuff right now, especially seeing that I would have been 15.5 weeks now. It’s heart breaking. More so, because my body still refuses to play ball & give me another cycle, so we can try again. 🙁

Post # 498
Member
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

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MrsNebraska:  Thank you again. Having to go to the hospital was easily the scariest time of my life and is making me terrified to try again. I know my husband wants to try as soon as we are given the okay, and deep down I do too, I’m just scared of going through this again. I guess I’ll just have to keep coming on here and talking to you wonderful ladies.

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MrsBananas:  Thank you for your condolences and of course, I’m sorry you have to be on these boards too. I have not yet gone back through and read everyone’s stories, but based on your latest post, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry. I hope your husband is just protecting himself because he’s scared and that this is just a temporary state for him. Best of luck with your testing and I hope you get some answers.

Post # 499
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee

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MrsNebraska:  oh I hope you don’t have to join me in October! Thanks for the birthday wishes by the way!

 

I am so, so sorry to all the new roll-callers. 

Post # 500
Member
1673 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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MrsBananas:  Our group has grown, but the bright side is that if you look at earlier pages and even part 4, the majority of these ladies have gone on to have BFPs and some are even mommies already. The odds are in our favor. As the one year mark keeps inching closer for me, it does get hard to rememeber that.

Post # 501
Member
844 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

whitums:  Go lefty go! I do know what you mean about IRL people. They get so awkward around me now… Whenever anyone brings up pregnancy or kids they get all weird around me. Not only does it make me feel like people cant be comfortable around me but it makes me feel like I’m the odd one out. Not too many people understand in my life what I went through and am still struggling with. I only have one friend who is currently pregnant. None of my other ones are at that point in their lives yet. It is hard to struggle alone. I definitely cherish this group of women!

desertgirl:  I’m so sorry you are here. My biggest fear is another mc or mmc. I hope your son can give you some comfort in all this. No one should have to go through one, let alone two.

MrsBananas:  Hopefully your O gets figured out soon. I’m also sorry to hear about your DH. My DH was definitely happy again to try, but we really had a breakdown in communication before my FW about TTC again. It was a really difficult time because I was ready and he wasn’t yet. We really had to talk about it and voice our fears. I know this isn’t for every couple though. It really helped us get on the same page. I’m hoping your DH comes around soon.

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Kay1126:  I’m terrified of having another mc. I was always unsure if something bad would happen when I was pregnant because I didn’t seem to have symptoms. I was worried my hormones weren’t where they were supposed to be, and I don’t think they ever truly were progressing correctly. I only had one regular dr’s appointment before we found out about the mmc so it’s so hard to know if my hormone levels were actually going down or not. I will be so happy to be pregnant again…I guess I would just embrace it and enjoy it. I will be terrified of the 9 week mark forever now.

 

AFM, DH is leaving Monday and will be back Sat. 20th. My POAS day is the 20th so I am super crossing my fingers for that.

Post # 502
Member
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

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MrsNebraska:  I hear you. I had a bad feeling almost immediately in my pregnancy. I don’t know if this is possible, but I felt like not waiting long enough after stopping BC had to do with it. Once I stopped taking my BC, I had so many “pregnancy” symptoms that never went away before I actually got pregnant- enlarged breasts, nausea, and blue veins. I wonder if my hormone levels were still all over the place when I got pregnant. Once I’m done with my D&C follow up, I’m switching doctors to get a second opinion on everything before TTC. I’ve been with my doctor since I was 18 but I just don’t feel like she monitored me correctly or gave me good advice at my pre-TTC appointment.

Anyone else feel like going off BC messed them up and may have caused a miscarriage? It may not make much sense but the symptoms I got afterwards that never went away make me skeptical. I’m so scared to try again.

 

oh and Mrs.Nebraska- good luck with your POAS date! Fingers crossed for you!

  • This reply was modified 7 years, 2 months ago by Kay1126.
Post # 504
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Can I join in? I had to use misoprostol on Saturday after I found out my two babies stopped growing and had no heartbeats. Horrible experience

Roll call:

Status (MC cycle/rest cycle/TTC cycle): Just waiting for my body to start healing

MC History: Issues (if any): This is my second miscarriage. I miscarried 4 years ago (also twins). No known issues

Action Plan for next TTC cycle (ie Baby Aspirin, progesterone, etc): No plan yet. I am hoping it doesn’t take as long this time. It took us 14 cycles to get pregnant last time

What are your biggest challenges right now? I wish I hadn’t started buying baby stuff. Now I have to look at it in my house.

Current coping strategies/favourite inspirational quotes: Joing this thread & leaning on my husband for support. 

Post # 505
Member
844 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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Kay1126:  My Mother-In-Law said the same thing about my BC when I mc’d. I went off birth control and a couple weeks later I got my BFP. After my MC she mentioned that maybe the BC had something to do with it, even though it isn’t commonly thought to have any influence on pregnancies being successful or not. But it’s weird that she also mentioned that.  And thank you! It’s going to be a long week lol.

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minniemluv:  I’m so, so sorry for your losses. I can’t 100% relate, but I can relate on the baby things. I had bought a couple outfits, my Mother-In-Law bought us a onesie, and for my DH’s birthday I had bought him some NFL baby gear. We found out about my mc three days before his birthday…It was so heartbreaking to get those gifts and wrap them. Now everything is boxed up in my home office so I only have to see it a few times a week. I hope you have a speedy recovery.

Post # 506
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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MrsNebraska:  Thank you so much. I have contained most of the things in one drawer so I don’t have to look at it in my face all the time. I did buy one infant rocker that is larger, so I’ll have to see if I can stuff that in the back of a closet. 

Post # 507
Member
498 posts
Helper bee

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4littlekitties:  “The things I was telling myself are things I’d never say to someone else.” I’ve never thought of my super negative self-talk in that context. I definitely haven’t been kind to myself lately, but it’s so hard when I feel so responsible for our failure to conceive and so impotent in fixing the problem.

I also look back to where we were after my son was born and before we started TTC and how, while I probably didn’t realize it then, how unemcumbered we were. Since TTC this second time around, I don’t know that I’ve felt true joy. The emptiness of my womb is constantly on my mind. I wish I knew how to fix that.<br />

Yesterday, my Mother-In-Law and SIL were giving me a bit of a hard time (really, just asking a lot of questions) about why we didn’t book a hotel room for my SIL’s wedding on Saturday (and there are no more rooms available). They seemed so shocked that we’d have planned to drive that night. And finally, I just had to say, “We were under the impression I’d be pregnant at the wedding, and now that’s not the case. So . . .”

They know about my miscarriage and they pretty much had nothing to say about it after that. Like, sorry to be the rain cloud dumping on the wedding talk, but how about BACK OFF?

Post # 509
Member
1637 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

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4littlekitties:  Ureaplasma (and I believe there is a similar but somehow different in the same bucket called mycoplasma)

Post # 510
Member
498 posts
Helper bee

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4littlekitties:  At the time, I felt I was being dramatic or self-indulgent by feeling as devastated as I did when I had a very early loss. Almost like, because I was only a week in, my pain was somehow less-than. I didn’t take a single day off of work, and I regret not giving myself more time to grieve and get to a better place before charging forward. 

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