(Closed) Journey of TTC after miscarriage part 6

posted 7 years ago in TTC
Post # 16
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee

Roll call:

Status (MC cycle/rest cycle/TTC cycle): TTC cycle

MC History: Issues (if any): Missed MC Feb 2013. I should have been 11 weeks and the twins measured nine weeks.

Action Plan for next TTC cycle (ie Baby Aspirin, progesterone, etc): I track my BBT and cervial mucus.

What are your biggest challenges right now? I have severe endometriosis and that is causing me problems getting pregnant again. It is also driving me crazy that so many of my friends are due this spring. I am onsidering taking a few months off fom trying. This is just getting too stressful.

 

Current coping strategies/favorite inspirational quotes: I am just focusing on living my life. We are buying a house and I’m ocusing on a lot of activism work. I igure while I’m waiting to be a parent I might as well accomplish something .

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Post # 17
Member
3828 posts
Honey bee

I just wanted to share since most people don’t understand any of this lingo, I had a regroup with my RE last night, and it looks like after this cycle we will be doing clomid and IUI. The thing that kinda sucks is that he said if ultrasounds show that I’m going to ovulate on the tubeless side, they will cancel the IUI, so I could be in for a long process. The awesome thing was he said my biopsy showed zero signs of endometritis (that’s uterine inflammation) and there was no evidence of any kind of bacterial or viral infection that would lead to endometritis. I don’t know if it just magically went away or what, but he said it is no longer an issue. The only other test result that was abnormal was my TSH, which I already knew about. Everything else is great. DH’s SA came back with 3% morphology which is just under the normal range. He said the morphology mixed with my lack of tubage are really the only reasons why he thinks its worth it to try IUI. I’m kind of excited to have a game plan now!

Post # 18
Member
1823 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Status (MC cycle/rest cycle/TTC cycle): TTC Cycle

MC History: MC (blighted ovum) in July 2014.  Miscarriaged naturally at 11w, but gestational growth stopped at 7w, even though our baby stopped progressing right after implantation.  We’ve been ttc  since June 2013

Issues (if any): MFI issues (all prognoses say IFV w/ ICSI).  We’ve done all the fertility testing and found that I have a fibroid (we aren’t sure if this is an issue or not) and slight hypothyroidism.  We were told we had a next to zero chance to get pregnant naturally. 

Action Plan for next TTC cycle (ie Baby Aspirin, progesterone, etc):  My cycle has just now gotten somewhat back to normal, so we will keep trying for a another miracle. DH is almost done 3 solid months of Clomid and I have a hystereoscopy scheduled for the end of the month.  I think we will try 3 more months naturally and then move to AR, whether that be IUI or IVF.  All depends on DH’s SA. 

Link to chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/MrsBananas

What are your biggest challenges right now?  Staying positive and trying not to compare our situation to others.  I’ve had 3 pregnancy announcements in the last week.  Also trying to get DH to live a healthier lifestyle. 

Current coping strategies/favorite inspirational quotes:  “Good things come to those who believe, better things come to those who are patient, and the best things come to those who don’t give up.”

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Post # 21
Member
2386 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I’ll roll call and hope that soon I’ll be moving on from this board with the rest of you. 🙂

Roll call:

Status (MC cycle/rest cycle/TTC cycle): Cycle before TTC. TTA until O and then it’s go time!

MC History: Surprise pregnancy in May while TTA and early MC at 6 weeks in June. TTA ever since.

Issues (if any): I know my progesterone was low from the MC. My cycles are a little long too.

Action Plan for next TTC cycle (ie Baby Aspirin, progesterone, etc): Charting, taking Pregnitude and Vit. D3, using OPKs and prenatals. Trying to excercise more regularly because I think that has helped me O sooner in my cycle when I do.

Link to chart: http://fertilityfriend.com/home/MrsFairyBee 

What are your biggest challenges right now? The fear of another MC once we do start trying again in December. Or of not being able to get pregnant at all.

Current coping strategies/favorite inspirational quotes: Prayer. Hope. In each struggle lies a test and a lesson that might help someone else down the road.

Post # 22
Member
1637 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

 

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MrsFairyBee:  I just looked at your chart and noticed you take pregnitude. Ok that was stupid because you mentioned it above too LOL.  I’m tired today   Anyway, do you think that might play a role in lengthening your cycle? I saw they were shorter and gradually getting longer as the months go by taking it.  I’m just curious because I’ve been wanting to up my game and get my body and eggs in tip top shape, so I like hearing the real experiences with the different options.

Post # 23
Member
1823 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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whitums:  Wonderful news about the lack of Endo and the plan moving onto IUI next cycle, very exciting to see a plan take form!  Hope the correct tube cooperates for you and it will be a quick road to success! 

 

Post # 24
Member
2386 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

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Andthepupmakes3:  I hadn’t even thought of that being a byproduct of taking Pregnitude. I thought it would not only help egg quality but also regulate my cycles, so I was hoping they would shorten, not lengthen, so idk. During my shortest cycle I worked out a bit more leading up to O so I was thinking maybe that helped get things moving quicker and am planning on trying that again for next cycle when we start TTC, b/c I can’t imagine waiting around this long for O when we are actually TTC; I’ll go crazy! I haven’t had any side effects with Pregnitude and there’s no way to tell if it’s actually helping my egg quality, just hoping it’s doing what it’s supposed to so we can hopefully avoid a second MC.

Post # 25
Member
1327 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Roll call:

Status (MC cycle/rest cycle/TTC cycle): Rest cycle

MC History: Had my first MC in April.  Baby was growing slow but had a heartbeat.  When I was around 9 wks I was told baby had died.  Baby had only grown to 6 wks  I had a D&C the next day.  Took a few months off of TTC then got pregnant again in July.  My HCG levels were not good and baby was measuring behind again.  This time baby grew to only 5wks so I opted to have a pill induced MC.  

Issues (if any): Recurrent MC

Action Plan for next TTC cycle (ie Baby Aspirin, progesterone, etc): Taking prenatal, vit D3, CQ10, spiralina, DHA.  Once I get a BFP I will take baby aspirin ans progesterone.  I also have taken some blood tests that my OB ordered.  Still waiting on the results.  I also have an appt with a RE next week. 

Link to chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/desertgirl

What are your biggest challenges right now? Just trying to stay positive and not let those negitive thoughts creep in. 

Current coping strategies/favorite inspirational quotes: Staying busy and planning parties until we TTC in January. 

Post # 26
Member
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Hi ladies, hope you are all doing well. I had a terrible day yesterday and just needed to vent. For those of you who need a refresher, I had a mmc in August (9ish weeks, baby only grew to 6)/D&C in September after waiting to miscarry naturally. It was my first pregnancy. DH and I have decided to postpone TTC until at least January, and after yesterday, I’m glad we did. AF is here with a vengeance. I should be grateful, because it seems my MC has (so far!) made me extremely regular. I got AF 4 weeks to the day of my D&C, and again 27 days later. But the way I’m feeling this time is really bringing everything to the surface. I keep remembering how I felt physically during my miscarriage, and thinking about how I should still be pregnant, not dealing with AF. Yesterday felt like Day 1 of my grief, I was back to being an inconsolable mess. AF has been here for 4 days, and I’m hoping when it’s over, these feelings will go with it. I’ve been doing so well lately, even going weeks at a time without crying. Sure, I still get sad but I’ve kind of accepted everything (I guess?) and am trying to be optimistic about the future. This setback worries me, what if I’m not emotionally ready to TTC soon? Like all of you, I want DH and I to be parents more than ANYTHING and I don’t want to postpone that. It’s mostly emotional healing that is causing us to wait- besides the fact that we’re moving next month and have some stuff we want to do in our new house before we move in, stuff that would be easier if I’m not pregnant. Anyway, sorry for the novel. I guess I’m wondering if this is normal? I’m sure it is. When you get those moments of overwhelming grief, how do you cope? I had to go out to my car a couple of times during work yesterday to cry. My wonderful DH brought home flowers, I felt better for about an hour, then started crying again. Today, I just feel emotionally spent and exhausted. I wonder if I’ll ever feel better before holding my rainbow baby in my arms.

Post # 27
Member
1637 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

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Kay1126:  I’m sorry to hear you’re having such a crap time of it right now.  What you are going through is TOTALLY normal.  I like to think about my MC grief like the ocean.  The intense feelings of sadness crash down on me like waves, unexpected and in pulses.  I can go 3 weeks feeling totally fine and great like I’m making progress and then BOOM a set of waves of grief roll in.  I’ve been doing pretty good overall this month, for example, I was SO HAPPY when we finally got the clear to TTC again- being on hold was not for me.  But then Monday happened and BOOM I’m crying at my desk at work uncontrollably, tears pouring out of me triggers by absolutely nothing.  I’ve been in a funk with little waves of grief hitting me still for the past couple days, but I have a feeling once AF comes and goes I’ll be back to the calm. 

For me, I do believe that my hormones are part of the problem.  I am always EXTRA sensitive about everything the week before my period, and my miscarriages are not safe from that hormonal reactor at all. 

You will feel better.  You will have your rainbow baby.  We are just working extra hard for our babies so when we do get them, we will appreciate them more than anyone can imagine.

Post # 28
Member
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

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Andthepupmakes3:  Thank you so much for the quick response. That analogy makes a lot of sense! I think I am way too rational of a person. If I suddenly feel like crap, I want to figure out why. My mom has told me my whole teen/adult life that I need to stop always trying to get to the root of my emotions and just allow myself to feel how I feel. But I hate not feeling in control! I felt crazy when I was crying so much yesterday. I just kept telling DH, “I don’t know why!” and he kept telling me I don’t have to, just let it out. I feel better knowing that I’m not the only one. I guess I felt like I should grieve in the same way I always have when I lost someone- feel awful in the beginning and eventually feel better. But this whole experience is a process and I need to be more accepting of that. And it definitely makes sense for hormones to play a role. Thank you so much for your kind words, and congrats on being able to TTC again! I hope to read happy updates from you soon. I totally agree, this experience will definitely make us appreciate motherhood that much more.

Post # 29
Member
844 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Kay1126: We are definitely in a similar boat when it comes to waiting (although I’m in a longer boat haha). It’s so difficult! But I also know it is best for us, so same as you! Everyone in my general circle is having babies and it’s hard. I also had to give up the recent “dream” of a Christmas baby annoucement to our families. It’s just the little things that hit heavier now. But thank you for the support. Some days are normal and some are just sad. I know you and I contribute to the fitness board together, but I feel like working out and losing weight has really helped me focus on other stuff. I have put more time into eating right, logging everything I eat, and trying new recipes! I also am entertaining the idea of starting a blog about cooking because of my free time. DH is really encouraging me to start one. I think it would be good for me to focus on my passions of cooking and baking.

 

As for your shitty day, I am so so sorry! I have definitely had those days with both losses. After my first loss, I was convinced I never wanted to try again. I even had some dark thoughts about my marriage and my own life, which I in no way ever truly meant. It was very difficult for me. The hormones played a huge role in that. But then days got easier. I still struggle, especially as January approaches with my first EDD. I just kind of accepted that grief comes in waves. With my 2nd loss, DH immediately said we could try again. I felt a lot of anger about that. I was so angry with my body for doing this a 2nd time. I, once again, didn’t ever want kids. I was inconsolable for a couple days. But then it got a little better. I focused on other things (which I’ve talked about). Do I still get sad, yes. Am I still angry, yes. But I can get healthier for the next time. I can enjoy wine during the holidays. I can focus on DH and myself for a while longer. I am trying every day to find the silver linings. I know it can be difficult, but sometimes you have to just know that it will get better. Hormones play dirty games on us, so just be kind to yourself. You have every right to feel what you feel. 

  

View original reply
whitums:  So happy to read your update. I am glad you don’t have endo and that you have a game plan.

View original reply
MrsBananas:  I’m also trying to get DH to live a healthier lifestyle. He is slightly overweight, not that I think that is the reason we have had 2 losses, but it probably doesn’t make the odds easier. I struggle with not coming off as being a naggy wife. He’s very sensitive about his weight, and anytime we eat he immediately says he’s still hungry. I tell him wait 20 minutes and drink some water and see. He gets pissy everytime, but yet I’m usually right. Men…

Post # 30
Member
76 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Hi all, I used to post on WeddingBee when I was planning my wedding, I’ve missed it.

My husband and I started TTC on December 2013, we got our first BFP on August. Unfortunately, the baby stopped growing at 9 weeks. We were devastated. I’m looking for a little support during this hard time…

Roll call:

Status (MC cycle/rest cycle/TTC cycle): rest cycle. We were told to wait for a couple cycles before trying again.

MC History: we got our first BFP ever on August. We got to see the baby and hear the heartbeat at 7 weeks. We went back to the OB at 10 weeks for a check up, only to find out the baby had stopped growing a week before. Had a D&C on 9/26 and got my period on 10/20.

Issues (if any): none

Action Plan for next TTC cycle (ie Baby Aspirin, progesterone, etc): just my usual Prenatal Vitamins, OPKs and FertileCM. I have an OB appointment on 11/12 to check if we can start TTC again next cycle.

Link to chart: i don’t temp, so my chart is pretty boring…

What are your biggest challenges right now? waiting… I just feel so mad and sad, we had a baby and we lost it. Also, everyone around me is pregnant or having babies, and I feel so alone In this journey.

Current coping strategies/favorite inspirational quotes: i’m trying to stay positive, but it’s not working…

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