Post # 1
I called off my wedding yesterday after months of cold feet. I had been with my fiance for four years, in which time we had ups and downs. I left him two years into the relationship because of his temper, controlling ways and argumentative attitude. He’s a lawyer and would always try to lawyer me in the relationship–winning an arugment with him wasn’t even an option. I found myself apoligizing when I wasn’t even wrong. In addition to the above his family was very cold towards me. They have never welcomed me or showered me with any love. He promised me he would change and so I took him back after a week. We proposed a year later with a gorgeous ring and a trip to Paris. Over the course of our 4 year relationship, we had amazing times. But what I’ve come to realize is, after marriage things only get harder. The icing on the cake was the 18 page pre-nup he gave me two months before our wedding. It basically left me with NOTHING in the case we would ever divorce. Everything would go to him, since he is the breadwinner of the family. If I decided to stay home and raise the children and we later on decided to get a divorce, I would only be eligible for child support, no alimony. What it taught me was, he had no trust in our relationship. It would be one thing is he was inheriting millions from his family and he wanted to protect that. I would have had no problem signing one under those terms, but what he did to me was just WRONG. His parents have brainwashed him in the last few months he has turned in to a complete momma’s boy. I can’t help but feel sad. Ultimately I know I made the right decision, but I can’t help but feel miserable.
Post # 3
@kindercare: Obviously I know nothing about your relationship, but it sounds like you made a good decision. Someone trying to exercise that much control over you (with the need to always be right no matter what the circumstance) can never love you like you deserve. You are protecting your future and sacrificing right now for what will be so much better later on.
Time to find someone who treats you like a partner, not a client 🙂
Post # 4
*hug* It sounds like you made a wise decision and it’ll just take time to heal. Focus on yourself!
Post # 5
So sorry you having to go through this. It sounds to me that you made the right choice for YOU!
Post # 6
Good for you. He sounds selfish, and I am glad that you realized this before marrying him. A prenup should be written so that both parties are mutually satisfied not just one. Goodluck to you in the future. Lots of hugs!!!!
Post # 7
Best of luck moving forward, and you did the right thing by standing up for yourself.
Post # 8
Wow I’m so sorry! It sounds like you truly made the best decision and good for you for following what you knew was right. Chin up, it will get better and will come out of the other side of this Stronger and wiser and ready for a relationship with a man that truly madly deeply no matter what loves you which is what you deserve!
Post # 9
aw I am so sorry this has happened to you, but you made the right choice, now you can start fresh and eventually marry the man you are supposed to be with who will love you unconditionally like you deserve..better you figure it out now rather than ten years down the road and a couple of kids later.
Post # 10
I’m so sorry you have to go through this. On the upside, breaking an engagement is FAR easier than going through a divorce.
Sending good thoughts your way!
Post # 11
Oh my gosh, judging by only what you wrote, seems like you made a wise decision…not many girls can do what you did. You’re amazing! Go you!
Post # 12
@kindercare: i am so sorry that you are going through this. by reading your post, you have made the right decision. he sounds far too controlling. it is an eye opener when you realize that you are apologizing for not being wrong. this really is for the best. it takes a strong woman to recognize this and take action. good for you.
are you living together now? do you still have to separate your belongings and everything. that is not easy. if he is that controlling, do you feel in danger in any way or was this amicable? do you have a friend or family member to be there with you?
Post # 13
@kindercare: I’m so sorry about you having to break off your engagment. Just reading this and have little facts, I feel as if you made the right decision. (hugs) Please stay strong.
Post # 14
I’m so so sorry that you’re having to go through this but I hope this is a hardest part and that it just gets better from here. Stay strong.
Post # 15
You did an amazing thing! Good for you! It takes strength, courage, integrity, abd EVERYTHING GOOD to do what you did. As Mr. Burns on Simpsons would say, “Excelsior to you!”
Post # 16
I’m so sorry you have to go through this. I can’t imagine how you’re feeling, but as the other ladies said, it sounds like you made a good decision for YOU. One day you’ll be able to look back with peace on the decision and you’ll be proud of yourself. Good luck!