(Closed) just for fun – whats the least romantic way your SO has initiated sex?

posted 8 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 17
Member
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

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@MsMonkey:  when i read that i was just about to say what 
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@Sweet.Sugar.Rose: said!! seriously? the penis-copter is not sexy! “hey babe, wooo wooo woo! ” as he’s swinging. hillarious, … but no 😛 OR

if anyone’s seen the movie Waiting you’ll know what i’m talking about! HE DOES THE GOAT TO ME ALL THE FRIGGING TIME! it’s not attractive AND such a turn off just like wacking his penis on my forehead when i’m lying on the couch! gosh i’m trying to watch tv and he just flops his penis on my head!

Post # 18
Member
3667 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

“After this episode?”

He was not successful that night. Haha.

Post # 19
Member
587 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@Nona99:  I get something similar except “honk”

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@Sweet.Sugar.Rose:  I get the poke too, usually when I’m half asleep

 

Surprised so many of you deny the unromantic approach! We both work so much that it’s kind of rare for one of us to really SEDUCE the other. There’s a lot of, “alright, finish your wine and lets get to it”

Post # 20
Member
672 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

At 4am…

Me: *sigh* “I can’t sleep..”

Him: *groggily* “Sex?”

lol…yes we had sex. The absolute most lazy sex that one could have..but it was still pretty good.

Post # 21
Member
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

+1 for the lazy poke. I’m lying in bed and trying to go off to sleep, when I feel a poke. And I think to myself, “that’s not his finger, is it?” Sometimes works, depends how tired I am.

Post # 22
Member
4597 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

The most amusing time, but I don’t know if it was the least romantic, was waking up to discover he’d put my hand on his boner. We totally did it. Hahaha. The next day I asked “did that happen?” “Yup” was the response. 

Post # 23
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

My other half conistently initiates unromantic sex. He is always up late at night so will creep into bed when I’m asleep and literally dry hump my leg (just like a dog) until I give in and have sex with him so I can go back to sleep undisturbed!

I have tried pointing out to him that this is not the greatest way to initiate sex but alas to no avail!

 

 

Post # 24
Member
619 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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@ladyartichoke:  my Fiance does that all the time! Either as im going to sleep or waking up.

His other method is to pull his pants down, flash me his ass and proclaim “fresh buns! Come and get em!”. Usually most effective after a shower…

Post # 25
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

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@MsMonkey:  I just read your story while at work and had just taken a drink of water – almost spit it on my computer screen. Funniest story on this post. 

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@kerpao:  haha! “penis-copter” – HAHA! My DH does that too. WHY do they think it’s sexy. I just laugh

Post # 26
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee

The oddest time was when I was standing up in the garage. He comes out of no where and starts dancing on me like some 15 year old at homecoming. Like full on grinding. I started busting up lauging but it did work.

Post # 28
Member
26 posts
Newbee

3am I’m sound asleep. He apparently was not. Gets up, turns on the light, “accidentally” knocks some stuff off the table, turns light off, BUTT BOUNCES the bed like pacman, then leans over “are you awake?” with his rock hard dick. This is a reocurring thing.

Post # 29
Member
2892 posts
Sugar bee

The “out of nowhere boob honk.” Yeah. NEVER works. I don’t want him to ever think that lazy ass move will get him some. If I have to put in all the work having sex with you (and I do a fantastic job) then you have to do more than just honk my boob. 🙂

Post # 30
Member
1119 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

yeah we are guilty of non romantic sex requests here… DH will just lay naked in bed and wait for me.. I also initiate in non romantic ways too, but I give him time to process the request.. I’ll say: honey, tomorrow you’re putting the moves on me at 8pm.

We always succeed…

Post # 31
Member
92 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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@claireos:  AHMEN!

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