Post # 31
so I am finally feeling better emotionally and I guess im playing the waiting game until next wed. So far im just tired and moody but nothing too crazy. I just want to say thank you again for all of your support. I have always been pro-choice and it is definetly not easy, however I know that at this very moment this is the right choice for me.
I just turned 27 about a week ago and I am still living at home, I do work and make a decent amount of money but I can barely afford an apartment in this city on my own. Adding a child into the mix would not make the situation any better. I love my boyfriend but there are also some things that need to be worked out between us before we have a child. He is all for me keeping it IF I want to but like I said, it is not the right time for me. Our relationship has also been somewhat rocky and although we are very much stable now, I feel like we need to be stable for a longer period of time. I think it’s alot easier for men to say keep it because excuse my language but if shiit goes down, kids are usually with mom. Daddy is still daddy but they are around on weekends, the sole responsibility falls with MOM.
He knows I would like to get married first, have one or a few years of marriage 1 or 2 before we start actually trying to get pregnant. I am also working on some personal goals like blogging, getting my own apartment, and traveling. I have 4 international trips planned already for this year. Too many variables that im just not ready.
Thanks for lustening. I’ll let you guys know what happens when I make the appointment. Im going to try to enjoy this weekend.
Post # 32
- Wedding: October 2016 - Lola's Trailer Park
Goodluck bee! You don’t owe anyone an explanation of your choices other than “because I want to”.
You seem like a smart woman witha good head on her shoulders, you’ll get through this.
Post # 33
confusedbee1234567 : Good luck bee! I also agree you don’t anyone an explanation. I’ve had 2 abortions at different stages in life, and I don’t regret them, as they were the best decision at the time. I am now almost due with my first child with my husband. Like you, I had similar goals and the partners I had at the time were relationships full of issues. I’m now in a good place in my life, in a stable relationship and am excited to start a family. You will have that also. Best of luck! It’ll go smoothly I’m sure! And that’s great that you have some support, I had my best friend accompany me to my procedures, it helps to have someone there to support you.
Post # 34
Im back weekend was good, however, as the days go on, I feel more ehausted. I slept ALOT over the weekend. I love to sleep but I’ve been sleeping more than usual. How normal is this? I’ve been waiting to call the clinic on wedsneday.
Post # 35
I just want to offer support. I give you ALL the credit in the world for making such a difficult decision so rationally and so responsibly!
Post # 36
- Wedding: March 2017 - Outside in Paris
confusedbee1234567 : the fatigue is normal. Take care of yourself Bee!!
Post # 37
Thanks ladies. Ughh so normally I’ve been sleepy but tonight I just feel sick. Now I’m REALLY starting to freak out. I’m going to call the clinic tomorrow and I’m going to see if they can hopefully make an appointment for me this week.
I’m not sure I ate something or if it might just be this. For the most part I’ve tried to keep calm and I have been trying to be patient with myself (I’m a very impatient person). I’ve been trying to meditate and do ANYTHING THAT can calm me down.
This weekend I have 3 photo shoots lined up and I’m not sure if I should confirm or reschedule. I’m hoping that I can come to the clinic Friday. I have a feeling I’m going to get zero sleep tonight. 🙁
Post # 38
Appointment made for saturday. I am very very nervous. Wish me luck.
Post # 39
- Wedding: October 2016 - Lola's Trailer Park
confusedbee1234567 : Goodluck! You’ll be fine. They do this sort of thing all the time, every day. You will be in good hands.
Post # 40
confusedbee1234567 : Bee. Nausea is a totally normal symptom, as is fatigue, but with all this stress and worry, you’re probably not helping yourself out on that front. Take some deep breaths. This WILL be worked out. You’ve taken the steps that you need to. You sound like you have a very good head on your shoulders, and you (and your BF) are dealing with it in a calm, mature way. You need to take a deep breath and take a step back.
Post # 41
Thank you for ALL of your support is all appreciated. Tomorrow is the day this is actually happening. My appointment is at 9am. For some reason im very irritable. Im not sure if it’s because it’s hot as hell over here and im just annoyed at being pregnant right now in this heat, my boyfriend for some reason is also getting on the last of my nerves. He is not working right now not by choice but he’s waiting on something and it annoyes me that he spends ALL day playing video games. He can play for 12 hours straight. Hes active in the gym but he literally spends ALL day gaming. I hate the fact that when he doesn’t have a job he’s so unproductive. This man is educated and hard working, but he is also lazy.
On Monday he is supposed to be attending his uncle’s Army promotion and he is bummed out about it because now he says he needs to stay with me. His uncle works at the Pentagon and he got a huge deal promotion. Apparently he has family coming from all over the country for this. I don’t understand why this is such a HUGE deal where people have to take time off to come see this guy get promoted. Granted I like the guy, hes awesome but I just think his family loves making huge deals about everything. I think it’s nice that they could go but it’s a promotion, however its like any other job. Like does the president need to have his mom, dad, uncles, nieces and nephews aside from his immidiate family to see him take over presidency?
He is texting me about this and how all his cousins are going and this and that and I am trying to keep my cool and not be rude about it. I told him listen just go, ill probably come to work on monday. Im just so over his family being so NEEDY. His mom was upset about him not walking up in her house for thanksgiving. Then she spent all day calling us to see what time we were coming. I had JUST gotten writst surgery the day before. We got there at 3PM and yeah that was pretty late to her.
Sorry guys just ranting a bit here. Super nervous about tomorrow too and annoyed. Ever since it got this hot in NY i’ve been over the edge with everything and everyone. Not sure ill be able to sleep.
Post # 42
confusedbee1234567 : well, if nothing else be glad that all this is confirming your belief that you’re not ready to have a kid with him and join his family. Even though it’s clearly the right decision for you, it’s a tough one–at least they’re not making it any tougher. 😛
Good luck tomorrow, I hope it goes as smoothly as it can.
Post # 43
confusedbee1234567 : take a deep breath. You’re going to be ok, and you’re going to be able to sort this out on Monday.
start by calling Planned Parenthood to see if you can get in there this weekend.
if not, call your OBGYN or GP and leave a message saying you have an urgent matter you need to attend to. I would actually get up early on Monday and call at 8 am, which is when most medical offices open. If you call at 8, you can get a same day appointment that they reserve for emergencies. You’ll get your physical and referral, and depending on your state you may be able to get the abortion pill there or you might have to get in to an appointment in a few days.
its not too late. You will be able to get this abortion. Just breathe and be calm.
Post # 44
justwondering2015 : Read updates. She’s way past the advice you gave and already had an appointment set up.
Post # 45
Update: So today I went in for the procedure. Surgical. I was put to sleep, however being nervous is an understatement. The procedure seems like it was short but the waiting and all was about 3-4 hours. A sonogram, some short counseling, blood work through finger (pinch). I did not want to see the sonogram, but I was told I was a little over 5 weeks. I’m sure if I was actually keeping the baby I would have been thrilled to see but this was not the case so I skipped that completely.
After the procedure I woke up with bad cramping, (when I remember waking up) and they sat me down and gave me a lollipop. I was in pain and was told that I’d be given iburoprophen so I asked the nurse if she was planning on giving me the iburiprohen. Well to my surprise she said she had already given me the medication which I didn’t remember so I asked did I swallow it ? (I asked because when I was younger I was not good at swallowing pills, I would chalk them up ) sometimes I still take a while swallowing them. she said yes. She also told me that she gave it to me right away because I had my legs on my chest, I was in a lot of pain. I do not recall any of this but clearly I was in pain. The pain did not last too long probably about 10-15 min and gen it started getting better and now I’m at zero pain just discomfort. It’s been a few hours.
My boyfriend came with me and was with me most of the time. He was not allowed when I got the procedure done. Anyway when I was out of the recovery room, he hugged me and told me how much he loves me. We both know this was right for us right now.
I did and still do feel a little emotional but not regret. I cried a bit when I saw him because you know this is a big deal and this is a hard position to be as a woman. We are also human.
Overall things went smooth and I’m hoping the recovery is smooth as well. I am taking some antibiotics for Three days to prevent infection.
Thank you to to all of you who have been so supportive through this process. It was not easy and barely anyone to talk to about the subject.
I feel blessed to have found this website with so many wonderful woman during hard times. I will update again after recovery. Might do another thread sharing my full story to maybe help someone else who might be in the same situation in the future.