Post # 1
bees, i need so much support
my SO *finally* proposed. finally! it was great. we went to call our parents. mine were happy, etc. when we went to call his…
his mom said WHAT? and started going off on how spoiled i was, how i take him away from the family, how i keep a “tight leash” on him. hes called her 3 times today (and his dad isnt happy either, but not AS unhappy as she) and its turned into literally one of the worst nights of my life.
she unfairly twists situations to make me seem like im the bully. IE – she wanted him to come home a weekend to help her with a party. He asked when, as he and i had plans surrounding that weekend. SHe flipped out and refused to tell him a time bc he should say yes no matter what, since shes his mom. She said that I am spoiled and controlling for “making him ask what time”.
i feel so sad and hurt. i didnt do anything to deserve this. and even if im “spoiled” (which i disagree with) is that really enough to not want us to get married? i dont even get her. she gave us 20k to buy a house together, under BOTH our names. but shes so against us getting married?
i am so jumbled. and so sad. and everyones asking how dd the engagement go and in realiyt, its the worst night of our reltionship so far.
Post # 3
That was just wrong and hurtful, I am so sorry she did that. Don’t let her horrible behavior spoil your wonderful night, then she wins.
Congrats on your engagement! Let’s see some ring porn.
Post # 4
She obviously just cannot let go and I am sorry! HUGS and let’s see that ring!!!!
Post # 5
She sounds like she is just not ready to let go of her baby yet. Give it time. Dont let her run you off or step on your toes. Now is the time YOU AND HIM are building your life together. She can be part of that or not. She has to understand that he isnt always going to be there at a drop of a hat. Dont let her take away your special day.
Kinda sucks that she was so taken back by all this. Especially to where she wasnt mature enough not to keep her cool and hold her negative comments to herself. You FIANCE needs to make sure to have a back bone and make sure his mom knows that you are in his life to stay. That she did wrong and owes you an apology. You deserve it. You didnt do anything wrong.
Not trying to be mean.. but he needs to stick up for you. Stop calling her.. she is just playing a game. Let her cool off and let her make the phone call to talk about things.
Post # 6
Dont let her hurt you..I have a Future Mother-In-Law from hell too who ruined my happy newly-engaged time and I still resent her for it. Just ignore her comments, if you and your SO are happy then what is it to her even if you DO keep him on a tight leash and are spoiled.
You could always confront her about it and ask her why she feels this way. 100% sure she would back track and look like a fucking idiot.
Post # 7
Your FI’s mom sounds like the controlling one, not to mention manipulative! Don’t feel so bad, maybe they’ll warm up to you. Your Fiance should definitely have a chat with his parents though!! Good luck with everything and CONGRATS! Don’t worry, be happy 🙂
Post # 8
*Hugs* Well congrats on the engagement!
Don’t let her win the day by making you sad, enjoy being engaged to your FIANCE! Eeep! It sounds like she’s having issues ‘letting go of her baby.’ Yeah, she’s his mom, but you’re his future wife, and you’re the new #1. Hopefully she’ll come around, just try to be as polite as possible and kill her with kindness (and make sure that Fiance is the one putting her in her place, no need to get involved in that mess!) Ring porn?! 🙂
Post # 9
Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! I agree with tks – let’s see some ring porn to celebrate such an amazing event. Congratulations and I hope you can salvage some specialness from this day.
Post # 10
The important thing here is how he reacted to her behavior. If he is on your side then he loves you and is standing by you and that is something to celebrate.
Post # 11
eeh…let it roll off. She’s clearly got her knickers in a buch over the recent incident…once she cools off she will be warm up to it. The announcement just came at a bad time it looks like.
my Future Mother-In-Law just said “that’s nice” when we announced it….lol. People react in the weirdest ways.
Post # 12
First of all CONGRATULATIONS! That should be the first thing every couple hears, and it sounds like you Future Mother-In-Law maybe was caught off gaurd by the proposal? My Fiance told everyone in the world he was going to propose beforehand, so noone was surprised, but do you think maybe his mother is a little hurt that she didn’t know he was going to propose before he did. I guess I’m trying to find some possible way to make it right how she responded but it’s not. Anyone who loves their child should be supportive of the person they choose to spend the rest of their life with. I’m sorry that happened, on your engagement day of all times. Hope to hear an update!
and until then… Go celebrate your new status!!
Post # 13
thank you everyone, it truly makes me feel a lot better. a lot of my friends are asking how it went, but i dont want to spill all this family drama since i feel that its inappropriate and disrespectful
sorry if this just ramble-y, but i still am all out of sorts. i am so upset; ive been thinking about weddings for years now. i have been on weddingbee (lurking) for over 5 years!! and tonight was finally my special night and this ruined it.
when Fiance first told his mom she just goes ‘whaaaaat… ‘ then goes into al these examples of how i’m spoiled anad i’m too posessive over him. she claims that since he asked her what time the weekend event started (mentioned in OP) i was being too posessive and taking him away from her. well, great. she brought up a bunch of other stuff to make me seem like the bad one. then when Fiance tried to talk to her about them again, she just flat out makes stuff up/changes things and then it becomes a ‘he said she said’ ordeal.
neither his mom nor dad said congrats or anything positive. his dad said he was surprised, and was offended he didnt tell him ahead of time (so that he could be talked out of it? im just bitter.) and his mom just thinks im spoiled and thats enough to be so unhappy about it. though i’m not admitting to what shes saying, so what if my Fiance spoils me a bit? is it that bad where you’ll hate me? ugh. im still so upset
i just want to be happy 🙁 and me and Fiance fought for a while tonight over his mom. i feel like this really ruined everything
thank you, so so much, again. i really love you bees, and i so appreciate all the support. its going to be so awkward seeing her in the future bc i know she doesnt like me and her son is too good for me and im taking him away from her. and ijust have to act like everythings hunky dory.
i am so upset. sorry if this didnt make sense. about the ring porn, it was also a slight disappointment. it looks nothing like the tacori that we wanted it to, and it is much too thick – my fingers cant even come close to touching each other. 🙁
Post # 14
Update? I know you mentioned on another thread that you updated the situation, but I can’t find it!
Post # 15