(Closed) Just got off phone with my ex- what\'s wrong with him/us?

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 137
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

You’re bonkers! 

Post # 138
Member
588 posts
Busy bee

He’s made it pretty clear he doesn’t want a future with you from what you said.

Go to counseling by yourself, fix yourself. You will never be able to ‘fix’ him into what you want. You only fix you.

Get yourself a subscription to a dating site, go on a few dates with other people to see what other functioning, loving relationships you could have and possible happiness that doesn’t involve him.  Give it a year of exploring new options and if you STILL want to go back then come back to the bee for suggestions on it. 

Post # 139
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Serious question but why on earth would you keep putting yourself in that situation? and for that long? You need to let go of the mindset that you can change him. He is not going to change unless he WANTS to and clearly he has zero desire to. I don’t really understand how you can fall in love with someone who does literally nothing to earn it. What did he ever do that gave you butterflies or think “wow this guy is awesome”? At what moment did you realize you loved him?

Sure, the guy definitely has issues but you ignored all of those red flags for TWO YEARS and you are still reaching out to him and contacting him. STOP. Move on. You will eventually find someone who is more emotionally available.

Post # 141
Member
1401 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Post # 142
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: September 2017

zebra10:  Here’s a tip, stop calling him

Post # 143
Member
588 posts
Busy bee

zebra10:  Step away. Don’t reach out to him. If you actually mattered to him, you would think he would care enough to reach out to YOU. who else have you dated in that 5 month time period?

Post # 144
Member
2715 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter\'s Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

WHY SHOULD THE “RIGHT TIME” FOR MARRIAGE BE HIS DECISION ALONE?  YOU ARE PART OF THE RELATIONSHIP AND ABSOLUTELY HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE PART OF THE DECISION AS TO WHEN THE RIGHT TIME IS.  IT’S NOT FAIR TO NOT WANT TO DISCUSS IT.  IF A GUY WANTS A FUTURE WITH YOU HE WILL BE HAPPY TO DISCUSS IT WITH YOU AND NOT DUMP YOU WHEN YOU ASK ABOUT IT.

I’m done.  No matter what any of us say you are going to continue to moon after this guy for the rest of your life.  If that’s what you want, be miserable for the rest of your life because he will not change.  Forget about all the wonderful men out there who will actually treat a woman properly and let this sociopath continue to use and abuse you.  I’m not wasting any more of my time on this ridiculous thread.

Post # 147
Member
3224 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

zebra10:  You need help. I mean seriously, you need some fucking serious, psychiatric help. 

Post # 149
Member
3224 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

zebra10:  Uh no, that is not why you need the help. 

Post # 150
Member
3686 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Ok, since you won’t listen to the many, many reasons why you shouldn’t want to be with this guy, and you clearly have no self respect, here’s your plan to get him back:

  1. Show up at his place wearing sexy lingerie.  
  2. Fall to your knees and give him the most incredible blow job he’s ever had.
  3. Lather, rinse, repeat.

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