Post # 1
Member
820 posts
Busy bee
Hey hive!
I just got an invite to my friend’s wedding who is getting married the weekend before me (8/15). I’m confused because I JUST ordered my invites and was not planning on sending them until late June. Her wedding is not a destination wedding, it is in her hometown. I am pretty sure she is the one who sent the invites too early, and I’m not sending them too late, but should I be planning on sending my invites a lot sooner?
Thanks!
Post # 3
Member
3526 posts
Sugar bee
I don’t think you are late. But perhaps a)she did not do Save The Dates and/or be she has a lot of OOT’ers and want to make sure that everyone has time to arrange travel.
I’m planning to send out SaveTheDates for my August 2010 wedding by this October. And invites by early May of 2010. It’s a good amount earlier than "etiquette" but I want SaveTheDates out before holiday season hits. And I want invites out before summer vacation starts and when I think families will start planning summer vacations. 95% of my guests will be Out of Town as will we!
Post # 4
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee
No, your friend sent the invitations too early, especially if most of her guests are local.
Post # 5
Member
820 posts
Busy bee
Shoot but I didn’t send STD’s either. Some of you may know we changed our date- we had sent them for the first date, so guests had all the info-(which didn’t change) then we spread the word by word of mouth/email about the new date. Should I send mine earlier??
Post # 6
Member
2324 posts
Buzzing bee
I would send them about 8 weeks ahead of time, but no more. Things get lost!
Post # 7
Member
1078 posts
Bumble bee
That is definitely WAY to early. She must not be reading up on her wedding etiquette! Definitely don’t follow with another early invitation mailing.
If I were a guest to her wedding, I’d be a little thrown off. She is a little to over eager!!
Post # 8
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
There are many reasons why she may have sent her invites out early (I don’t think it means shes over eager). She may have many Out of Town guests, she may have an earlier deadline to get back to her caterer or other vendor, she may have other plans closer to the date which might make it more difficult for her to send them at the "right time", she may want to get them out before people plan vacations…. etc.
No worries, send yours out with enough time to get your final head count and you should be fine.
Post # 9
Member
41 posts
Newbee
i am getting married on august 8th 2009 and i am sending my invitations out on may 8th and asking they be returned by july 8th…am i eager?? i don’t care if it seems that way…all of my guest are out of towners and we have a couple of blocks or rooms at the hotel..i want to make sure that our guests can get reservations somewhere…also, it is wedding season you know…in the summer months, as well as summer vacation for kids…i would like to know sooner then later where i am going and what i have to plan for…i think wedding etiquette is more of a suggestion in this instance…do what you want!! i don’t want to a calling people who don’t rsvp two days or a week before my wedding!
Post # 10
Member
1205 posts
Bumble bee
I would be floored to see an August invitation already! Keep to your original timeline.
Post # 11
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
Yep I agree. Way too early! I’m sending mine out about 9 weeks before. I think 8 weeks is the norm!
Post # 12
Member
29 posts
Newbee
Oohh ouch! Being called over eager just because u sent ur invites earlier than people would want u to…that’s a little harsh people. No matter what her reasoning is for sending her invites early, it was her choice. And if u were one of those people who received an early invitation, be grateful and glad that u got it early. I think getting the invites earlier than the "norm" is way better than waiting for that invite to come and wondering if that person invited u or not at all. Geez, we’re all planning or have planned a wedding here, we know how sensitive we get with these kind of criticism. What harm can she possible make by sending out her invites early? Giving people a heart attack coz she’s on top of her game and totally broke an etiquette rule?
Post # 13
Member
7081 posts
Busy Beekeeper
People keep hounding me about my invitations, and the wedding is not until July… and we sent out save the dates. In my crew, eariler is better… but they are not getting their invites until the end of this month because that’s when I’ll be done 😛
I don’t think there is a right time anymore… It depends on your situation.
Post # 14
Member
521 posts
Busy bee
People lose invites when you send them that early. Waaaaaay too early. I’m getting married July 3 and I haven’t sent mine yet.
Post # 15
Member
1078 posts
Bumble bee
Just voicing my opinion, like everyone else. 
I agree with you, Johnsbride09. Timing is always key.
Post # 16
Member
820 posts
Busy bee
Hmm, ok. Thanks for all the input. Maybe I will get mine out earlier than late June since we didn’t send a STD and it’s true, summer months are busy. I’m not sure. I was just shocked to see she sent it already. Also, she is not up against early venue deadlines to those of you wondering, it is at her parent’s house, and then a BBQ the next day. I have never ever EVER seen such a casual wedding invite… just plain white paper with black print, no inner env, etc. Which makes sense cuz she’s a casual gal, but sending out such casual invitations this early, I’d be afraid they’d be totally forgotten! It’s good to get everyone’s input though, I think I’ll stick with my 8 weeks as planned, POSSIBLY do 9 weeks.
