(Closed) Just need to vent…She is seriously messed up!

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 92
Member
739 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

That is so pathetic, all you can really do is feel bad for the woman! LOL!  

Post # 93
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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@Janielum:  I actually agree with the voluntary/involuntary part. At some weddings, the DJs are ruthless in getting unmarried ladies out onto the dance floor to catch the bouquet. At my last wedding with a toss, the DJ was so adament, that I lied and told him I was married to get out of it. The Fiance lied as well to get out of the garter toss.

 

 

Post # 94
Member
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Payless:  One of the BMs from DH’s SIL’s wedding pulled the same shit and recently posted it as her ‘throw back thursday.’ She was deleted. The photos show she pulled it out of my hand. It does suck. I bet your sister will appreciate the replacement!

Post # 95
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

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@Payless:  Hmmm… No disrespect here, but is your cousin socially delayed by any chance? I ask b/c her behavior plus her response to your PM reminds me a lot of a younger sister of a friend of mine. This sister was held back a couple grades in elementary school and doesn’t know how to behave in social situations. Just recently, she freaked out on a mutual friend b/c the mutual friend was organizing a birthday party for her sister (who is my friend) and reached out to family to get cards signed, etc.. It made things difficult, and I remember being like, “This is NOT how a normal functional adult behaves…” When I saw the “won it fair and square” response – that’s definitely something that I could expect from my friend’s little sister.

Post # 96
Member
3022 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

Your sister sounds awesome!

That picture speaks for itself (and that other post with the woman snatching the ball makes me want to kick a window). 

Post # 97
Member
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Haha. She looks like she is going to eat it. Crazy lady.

Post # 98
Member
1299 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Wow what an immature psycho! She sounds like a woman so desperate to get married she would make the engagement chicken on the first date.

 

i am glad you sent her the picture. Some people don’t realize how bad they come off unless confronted. Hopefully this will make her finally question her actions instead of joking about “winning” OP did she ever respond? 

 

this makes me glad I had already decided to not to garter or boquet toss.

Post # 99
Member
3694 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Your 8 year old sister is being the most mature here.  It’s done and over with, why get all upset about it and keep fighting with someone who got what they wanted?

Post # 100
Member
9538 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Payless:  First of all, I’ll warn you that I haven’t read all the posts (there are a ton!)

I definitely think that what your cousin did was uncalled for. It was rude and unthoughtful. It is not appropriate and should not be condoned.

However, I very much doubt that your cousin was being malicious. Sounds like she has a weird relationship with bouquet tosses. I guessing she just got caught up in the moment and wasn’t thinking. This in no way excuses her behavior, but I think it’s important to realize that this was a split second thing.

And it’s over. Nothing anybody can do to go back and change things.

The really good news is that your sister isn’t too bent out of shape. I think it is a fantastic idea to give her another bouquet when you see her again. I think she will really appreciate this. But I agree that if you make this into a big deal, she may get more upset by it than she initially was.

So you know how you’re going to help things with your sister. That leaves the cousin. Before you start posting pictures on facebook, I would encourage you to think about how publicly shaming yoru cousin will benefit you or anyone else. I don’t really see that as being good for anyone.

In these types of emotional situations I like to try to think about what I actually want. And I would encourage you to do the same. What do you want to get out of this? Will publicly shaming her and cutting her from your life achieve that goal? If what you really want is to make her feel awful because she hurt your sister’s feelings, then public shaming may be the way to go. But if what you really want is for your sister to feel better and have a good family dynamic moving forward, then I doubt that posting on facebook and cutting her from your life will be very benefical to you and your family.

Post # 101
Member
7362 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@Payless:  No I didn’t just read. that. Nope. I REFUSE to believe that.

Nope it didn’t happen.

EDIT: You are serious… And you do have a picture… OMG OMG OMG…

What a freaking c*&^!

 

 

Post # 102
Member
727 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Payless:  I think it’s so silly that she’s obsessing over catching a bouquet.  Wow.  I imagine your 8 year old sister is probably acting more mature than she is.

Post # 103
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee

Oh, I would post that picture. By itself. There’s no way I wouldn’t.

I’ve always thought of the bouquet toss as just a bit of fun, nothing else. It’s always good-natured friendly competition, and if you don’t win, you laugh it off and congratulate the lady who did. If you’re desperately single then tackling someone for the bouquet will do nothing to change that.

I caught the bouquet at my mom’s second wedding in 1997, when I was about 11, and I’m just now getting married… clear to see that there’s not that much to it. What your cousin did was monstrous in that she took a lighthearted tradition way too seriously and took all the fun out of it for someone who won fair and square.

Fortunately, in the end, it’s not that big a deal… it’s sad your sister didn’t “win” but I’d still consider her the winner if I were you. Ultimately it’s sad, but she’ll get over it; her life isn’t ruined by this. But your cousin sure does deserve a shaming. And a direct one. I’d just post the picture with a caption of “Congrats on winning the bouquet toss, cousin!”

Post # 104
Member
662 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

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@Janielum:  Lol to what you said. Also if you hate how single women are talked about why do you feel the need to talk about people in relationships so negatively? To even the playing field so to speak, for your single friends? so weird. 

OP I think it’s so sweet of you to get a bouquet got your little sister. Hopefully your cousin realizes her hang ups on bouquets. 

Post # 105
Member
53 posts
Worker bee

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@Payless:  You are my hero for not putting up with this and standing up for whats right, I would probably just fume in silence and resent her forever! You GO girl!

Post # 106
Member
90 posts
Worker bee

I would totally post that pic and title it “Guestzilla.” What an ass. Give your sister something memorable from the ceremony – your garter or hair accessory or something she can keep forever. Crazy will just have wilted flowers and a bad rep.

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