(Closed) Just putting it out there….Kids at weddings..

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Would love to do this except because of culture etc. it would be family suicide for my fiance. 

Added to that is that I love my really good friend’s kids & my fiance’s nephew (now mine too) and my FSIL/FBIL and my friend would put the smack down instantaneously as they are very discipline oriented. I would never cut these kids out as I truly adore them, so it’s hard for me to make an exception for them and then cut out kids I don’t care to see. 

In the end I decided to let it go. Besides, no one pays attention at Indian weddings (in India) anyway so I’m not expecting much from anyone vis-a-vis appropriate behavior except at certain audience participation points like the baraat and pelting us with rice. 

Post # 19
Member
846 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

this post confirms my decision to have no kids at our wedding!

the main reason my fiance and i decided this was because we needed to limit our guest list. but the second reason is that i was a bridesmaid in my cousins wedding a couple years ago and when her and her husband were having their first dance as a married couple, the only thing i can remember is dozens of kids running around screaming on the dance floor. where their parents were, i have no idea. all i know is that it is my wedding day and i want it to be all about my future husband and i (not trying to be self-centered, but this is that only wedding i will ever have and i put a ridiculous amount of time and money into that day!)

oh and for those of you that watch four weddings, there was an episode on a couple weeks ago where during the ceremony, a dozen or so kids were rolling down the hill behind the pastor so in the wedding video all you will see are kids in the background screaming. not happening at my wedding!

Post # 20
Member
758 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I wasn’t sure how I felt about having kids at my wedding either.  We ended up with 7 kids (out of about 110 guests) and we did not have a single kid-related issue. 

I totally agree that parents should remove their children before they throw a fit in the middle of the ceremony (come on, as a parent, you know when your kid is about to lose it…right?).  Don’t wait until they are in full-fledged melt-down mode.  I would be so embarrassed if my kid was screaming in any public place – especially a wedding!

Post # 21
Member
1397 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I say this with the love and tolerance for children that only a primary school teacher can have: KIDS BELONG AT HOME. I hate field trips for this reason. Kids get way excited over everything, especially when you have more than one of them. Parents, more often than not, just make it worse. On field trips they don’t take care of their own kids, much less the others they are assigned to… and at parties or in restaurants its often worse. Many people (not all, but many), have no regard for how their child’s behavior, germs, noise, etc. impacts anyone else. You can’t even blame the kids, when they’ve never been controlled or taught to behave by the people who are supposed to nuture them and, let’s face it, reign them in when they’re too nuts.

Again, I love kids, even groups of kids, but not outside of their appropriate environment.

Post # 22
Member
2902 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Poor bride, that is awful. This is the exact reason I am having a no kids rule. I don’t care if you think I’m mean, I think there is a time and a place for kids and a formal wedding is not it!

 

Post # 23
Member
790 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I’m sorry about the bride’s bad experience, and every couple is entitled to make the decision as to whether to include children. But I think it’s ridiculous to make blanket statements that weddings are not for kids/not appropriate places for kids. This must be a regional thing, because almost every wedding I’ve been to has had kids and they simply added to the festivities. People have been including children in weddings for a long, long, long time, so let’s keep a little perspective!! You can have an awesome kidless wedding, just like you can have an awesome wedding with kids. 

Post # 24
Member
4428 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@ashescats:  you have just confirmed that my feelings were right lol we ruled out kids at our wedding and at first i was feeling kinda bad but once the head of the hall told me that if one kid went over the rope in the back yard beautiful ceremony area that they would stop my wedding i said OOOh no everyone can keep there kids home even the teenagers lol livid would not cover what i would be if my wedding got stopped over someones child they were not watching.

plus were going to save a lot of $$$ cutting the kids plus were having an open bar i dont feel its right for the kids to be around the drinking and i rather the adults treat it as an evening out ; ) i know if i was invited to a wedding and they said no kids id be like yippy lol mom and dad are going out!!!!

Post # 25
Member
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

We had no problems saying no kids at the reception, NO EXCEPTIONS.  Kids can come to the ceremony, because the youngest kids will be my 3 year old nephews and my sister and SIL keep their mouths shut!

Post # 26
Member
4428 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

View original reply
@FauxBoho:  i have kids and i agree with you!

i love kids but at a big wedding they tend to be very excited and want to run around and go crazy with all the other kids. for us parents the wedding is a blur or as least it is for me can im concentrating on watching my some so much i scarf down my food so fast caz im not one to have my child running around out of control so i don’t even enjoy myself. the last thing i want is for my child to draw attention to himself for running around. i think i would crawl under a rock if i got “the look” with my son at a wedding.

Post # 27
Member
3367 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

My own kids were in my wedding and it was great.  Our youngest walked around a bit during the vows and played with some decorations, but nothing was disrupted.  They’re just normal kids and I’m not supermom and still nothing went wrong.  Some guests had newborns, but I believe they were taken aside if they cried, because I never heard them.  I couldn’t imagine not having my children dancing at our wedding.

Post # 28
Member
1192 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Been married almost a full year now and We didn’t have children at our wedding, we did however have our wedding in Vegas but the only child there was my brother who was 14. It was nice because I have experienced weddings like the one you have and it is aweful.

Post # 29
Member
2522 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Kids are heathens.

HEATHENS!

I don’t know how horrifying it was working at a children’s clothing/toy store. I can’t even describe it.

Keep your heathen asses home and out of my wedding, chilluns!
And put my booze down so I can pick it up!

Post # 30
Member
1684 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I don’t understand why the kids get the hate. Clearly it’s the parents that don’t have the couth to step outside with their crying babies that are the problem. Those are the people that should be left off the guest list. 😀

Post # 31
Member
6262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

As far as I know, I’m only having 3 that qualify as kids in the misbehaving sense- my 5 year old half brother, FI’s cousin’s 5 year old daughter, two angelic babies (who i’ve never seen cry) and my 7 year old cousin. The only one I am worried about AT ALL is my brother because he is HORRIBLY behaved. I am going to have him sit with his mother and tell her and my father that if he starts acting up AT ALL, even a little bit, he is to be removed. I can’t stand his behavior. He won’t sit at a dinner table, and all he does is yell rude things. I am going to have a talk with him when the wedding gets closer.

Edit- obviously my dad and step mom are responsible for turning him into such a little monster, but I can’t very well not invite any of them. So it’s going to come down to reasoning with him

The topic ‘Just putting it out there….Kids at weddings..’ is closed to new replies.

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