(Closed) Just putting it out there….Kids at weddings..

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 32
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

That stinks for the bride. In my large family kids have always attended weddings and I have never seen kids act like that, much less parents not removing a baby that cried during a ceremony. I have never seen kids poke the cake or run down the isle during the ceremony.

Definately must be a social circle thing because I don’t know any parents that would let their kids act like that.

 

Post # 33
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

We are planning on having a suite and nanny for the kids that attend our wedding so that the parents can basicly have a baby sitter for them during ceremony and reception no excuses why we should have kid related problems. They will have movies, games, food and supervision.

Post # 34
Member
945 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I don’t get it either. In my mind, weddings are for the grown ups. It doesn’t matter how good of a parent you are, if your infant wants to cry, it’s going to cry during the whole ceremony.

This was a major point of contention with me and Fiance. I was 100% against having kids at the wedding, and he wanted them there (all little kids in question would belong to our cousins, so none directly related to us). Lucky for me, one of his cousins said something to him, so now we’re adult-only. Thank god.

Post # 35
Member
2539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I ask myself that question almost daily.

We wanted no kids at our wedding – and we caught a lot of flack for it from family and friends. We literally had one friend say that they couldn’t come if his kids couldn’t come. (He was already in the wedding party, so…awkward much?) Family didn’t like it either, it wasn’t flying at all. So, we gave in and ‘allowed’ kids to come against our wishes. It was just better not to pick that battle.

The result:

My 8 year nephew crawled all over the floor all night, randomly popping up under all the tables. No one (*ahem*, the parents) wrangled him up. Then when we got our photos back, we discovered that he had photobombed some of our best pictures: He was sitting with us at head table while my husband serenaded me, I’m looking dreamy, nephew is making faces. And we only then also discovered that he had been sitting on the dance floor during our first dance. It’s us, our white head table, and him, sitting behind us on the floor in front of the head table. We were too caught up in the moment to see him. But there he is, right at our feet,  photobombing every romantic first dance picture. Our photographer was at least able to photoshop him out of one of the photos. Who lets their kid sit on the dance floor during a couple’s first dance????

Another kid ran onto the dance floor right as our friend starting doing his classic Billie Jean party dance, and she ran right under foot and got stepped on. She started wailing and that shut things down real fast. Fun – over.

Ugh. What happened to the days of discipline?? People need to stop being ‘friends’ with their children. Just my 2 cents.

Post # 36
Member
1430 posts
Bumble bee

Exactly why I didn’t have kids at my wedding and when I have kids in the future I will invest in a good babysitter! 

Post # 37
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I told all the adults bringing children to our wedding that if I caught their precious spawn unattended I’d be sending them home with a goodie bag containing a sippy cup full of Red Bull and a kazoo.

You think I’m kidding? Smile

Post # 39
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Ugh sorry bees the site freaked out on me! 

Post # 40
Member
733 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

oh god, we had a very similar experience, needless to say – NO EFFIN KIDS ARE COMING aside from the ones in the wedding party who are really the only ones close to us anyways

Post # 41
Member
1524 posts
Bumble bee

We had our daughter at our wedding who was completely well behaved (she’s 4.5) because we don’t put up with a lot. She’s allowed to be silly and have fun (and we have a lot of fun) 90% of the time, but she’s super well behaved at restuarants and at our wedding she was super respectful.

She knows boundaries because we enforce them and she understands why they’re there. Unfortunately, a lot of parents don’t. I couldn’t imagine letting her run around and doing whatever she wanted. At one of my friend’s weddings I tried to get her daughter to not run around everywhere, but she told me to just let her run and have fun so whatever floated her boat. She didn’t mind it (I was cringing hoping she wouldn’t trip or run into something). 

I think it’s important to let kids be kids, but weddings are not one of the places where they should be allowed to do whatever they want. 

Post # 42
Member
245 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I like kids O.O I don’t mind if they’re noisy during the wedding but I can imagine that inside a church the racket is rediculous. I’m having mine outside and there’s only one baby. 

Post # 43
Member
245 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

It’s also very rude of the parents not to take their kids out until they calm down. 

Post # 44
Member
4655 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

To me it’s just a bit ridiculous to invite a kid and probably pay for their head (depending on the caterer! in my case kids are just people to them) for an event they won’t really understand or enjoy, with an added reasonable chance they won’t want to eat the food I’m paying for.

I wouldn’t invite an adult I didn’t think wanted to be there to see me get married and enjoy that, and I can’t think of a single kid that could really appreciate a wedding, so I don’t want to invite them.

 

Post # 45
Member
7265 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m super jaded about this, because as a wedding photographer I pretty much deal with it at every.single.wedding. No lie. I have yet to attend a wedding that didn’t have disruptive kids. I think the absolute worst is actually during the reception. Generally, the kids bomb all the important photos – first dance, parent dance, and the biggest…..the cake cutting. The kids are ALWAYS standing next to the couple during the cake cutting. It drives me nuts!!!!

The main problem comes with the parents wanting to enjoy themselves, so they don’t pay any mind to their kids and they just run everywhere.

I was adament about not having kids at my wedding. Thankfully we only got flack from one person, who ended up not coming anyway because she wanted to save her time off for a ski trip. It was SO enjoyable, and most of our guests thanked us for not having kids. We are seriously the last of our group to get married, all our friends have kids. They all were so happy to have a night out, they really lived it up.

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