(Closed) Just sad about mom's attitude…[long sorry]

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@YogaFaerie:  I’m really sorry to hear this and this truly sucks! I know it’s not your mom’s support, but at least you have your FSILs support.  I’m like you, I don’t like to bring stuff up unless someone else does.  I think you may have to confront your mom about it.  At least tell her how you feel.  It’s not right what she is doing.

Post # 4
Member
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

Whose wedding is first? Couldn’t it just be that she can only get involved (mentally and emotionally) in one at a time, so you’re feeling left out right now if his is first?

Your post makes me sad, and I think if you had a heart to heart with your Mom, she’d feel so bad to know you’re feeling this way and that she’s the cause of it. Have you tried? Not arguing or being snotty or demanding, but really tried to let her know how important this is to you and how much you need her?

I hope she comes around sooner rather than later, and I hope you approach her about it now. Maybe take her out to lunch and bring it up? Any time I wanted to discuss something with my Mom that I thought might cause a scene, I picked a public place, knowing it was more likely to be taken seriously with strangers around and she couldn’t avoid me. It always worked too.

Post # 7
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@YogaFaerie:  Maybe mention it to your brother and Future Sister-In-Law, see what they say. Maybe they can speak to your mom and then you can approach her as well.  If it’s really bothering you need to speak up. Sept 2014 is a long way to go to keep quiet.  Don’t ever feel embarrassed to share your feelings!

I didn’t tell my mom, or family at that, that we were getting until 1.5 months before the date.  When I told her we weren’t getting married in a church but by an officiant in a courtyard she said why bother getting married and you can do that in here.  Why do you have to go to FL to get married if its not even a church. Needless to say I felt a little disappointed, not supported.  I did tell her it’s what we want, amonst other things.   I never did tell the Darling Husband about it, just mentioned to the our photogs and you.

Post # 9
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@YogaFaerie:  Hmm… I’m starting to wonder if there is something else bothering her. I’m sorry, but that just mean to just say no. You really do need to have a talk with her ASAP. Enlist the help of your brother and Future Sister-In-Law. I’m not sure what kind of relationship you have with your mom and if this is normal but to not show the least bit of interest that just kind of heartless. I know you don’t want to burden your Fiance with this but I think you should share what you are feeling and what’s going on.  Keeping it in is keeping you from enjoying this fun part the wedding planning process. IF at the end her attitude doesn’t change you have your bro, Future Sister-In-Law and friends. Share in the excitement with them, it truly will be your moms loss.

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