(Closed) Just thought of something….

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
1013 posts
Bumble bee

 I have indicated to my SO that he doesnt quite grasp how enormous of a task planning a wedding is.  I told him i have a dream of getting married September 2013, and i WANT a year to plan, so he should be proposing this summer if we want to make that heppen.  We also want to start having kids in 2 years so we need to get married next year for that to happen.

However his response was “Dont pressure me and dont tell me when to propose”

So honestly you can make your concerns known, but just bring it up and ask his opinion. Guys usally dont “get it” when it comes to wedding planning. But they also dont want to be told what to do because it can come across as an ultimatum.

Luckily my SO preceded that comment with “No problem! err…dont pressure me and dont tell me when to propose”

Post # 5
1013 posts
Bumble bee

@raye9289:  Yes i am HORRIBLE with keeping my mouth shut. He always knows when i am ‘in my head’ which happens often.

Just make sure you bring it up calmly. I have definitedly learned that its important to keep your cool regarding conversations like this.

Post # 6
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@raye9289:  I think instead of sending him ring pictures/size you should tell him your concern. I think the ring obsession of girls really freaks/turns guys off of marriage because it puts the wrong idea in their head. 

Let this mull around in your head for a few weeks then bring it up when the two of you are alone and can’t be interrupted. 

Best of luck! 

Post # 7
5474 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If your family lives where you do now, there’s no reason they can’t help you plan a wedding local to them even if you do move away.  I’d still talk to him, voice your concerns, and be open & honest with him.  But, as a back-up plan, if he isn’t ready to propose before you guys move away, then you can still get married wherever you want. 

Post # 8
3220 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

My Fiance didn’t know how many details were involved in wedding planning but when I said “I will need 6 months to plan this thing” he said “okay!” and made it work so we could get married this summer (which was a necessity due to work commitments.)


Post # 10
3571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@DaneLady:  This. People do this all the time. In fact, I’m basically doing this right now. I’m throwing an anniversary party / reception (we got married alone and didn’t invite anyone) in my hometown and we’re currently posted in Afghanistan. 

I’m probably going to get flamed for this, but really… It’s not that hard. Planning stuff can be as time consuming or as simple as you want it to be, but either way, there is very little you can’t do remotely with a little bit of help.

Post # 11
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Mrs.LemonDrop:  +1


I’ve got a bug up my butt lately to have a “surprise” wedding. I’m thinking we just “kiddnap” our Moms and siblings and have an “elopement” wedding in the tourist town about three hours away from home. 

Anyone see the new bing commercial, where the couple post an engagement thing on FB and wth in three hours they plan a wedding with their friends and throw it that night? Not exactly doable, but I could pull that off in a weekend. And Fiance loves the idea. =)


Just relax sugarbritches. Everything will be okay.

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