(Closed) Just when I thought I had it all under control (mini vent)

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
196 posts
Blushing bee

It’s tough to have all your friends getting engaged. Last year at work, I think there were like 7 weddings, it was nuts, and made me a little sad. I dunno, if it were me, I would talk to him about feeling a little anxious about it, especially if you think you are ready to start looking at buying a house soon. Discussing a timeline for your lives is fair, and since you haven’t really done so, it might be time to.

Post # 4
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee

Big hugs! You sound like you’re in a similar situation to me. I’m not moving to where SO is until we get engaged and probably have a courthouse wedding as well. He says it’s coming but other timelines have come and gone and I’m not sure if it will really come. He seems more comfortable with things, and mostly I’ve been focusing on me and we’ve both been working on improving our relationship, so mostly I’m okay.

But, like you, SOME DAYS, I’m just like ugh why can’t it happen already!!! I’m excited for the forever to begin, and I don’t get why he is so super slow. You seem to be pretty level-headed, and great about being happy for other people, so just think of it as a temporary blip on your otherwise awesome record/feelings about the whole thing. These blips always pass, and you know that, so maybe just accept that some days are harder than other days, and think about how lucky you are to have someone like your SO. That’s what I try and do, and most of the time it works pretty well!

Post # 6
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee

@MissGreenBean:  Omg I say that too! Hahaha! Hope to see yours too!

Post # 7
Member
699 posts
Busy bee

@MissGreenBean:  hey, last year we went to 3 weddings, one where i was a bridesmaid and i thought he’d get on board….no he was turned against the big day….well, my one gf went a little snarly close to the day. but, thats when she was planning for a year and it got to be a bit much lol. i’m also the elder sibling and my younger sister got married close to 6 years ago. Most of my childhood friends are married with families now. Only 2 of my gf’s haven’t got anyone, tg, so i can still do the gf’s night out lol. I know it’s hard to see others get what you want. But, know the universe has  a plan for you and you are right where your supposed to be.

Post # 8
Member
242 posts
Helper bee

I know how you feel. I’m in my late 30s and most everyone around me who has wanted marriage and children has gotten married and had kids. My younger sister is having her 3rd child next month. So I feel I have been lapped several times. But like you, I need to remember that everything happens in it’s perfect time and God has a plan or the Universe if you don’t believe in God.

I have high hopes that my SO will ask me by the end of the year because he said it was extremely likely but it’s still kind of hard to wait, especially at my age. But I know we are getting closer so I have to focus on that. It’s good if you guys can talk about it and you know that it’s coming soon and that you have a SO that is so wonderful. I have to remind myself that some of my friends who have gotten married might not have as good of a relationship as me and my SO do or didn’t work out all the kinks and communication stuff before marriage so we might be in a better place in the long haul.

I hope to hear of your engagement on this board soon!

Post # 9
Member
1332 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Ditto!! I do not consider myself waiting per se either, but know an engagement is coming ‘within a year’…per my SO a few weeks back. Now, although I’m truly excited, and promised myself I would not anticipate when, where, or how…it is still pretty hard too. That timeline could mean tomorrow or 11 months, 30 days and 23 hours 🙂

in the meantime all my friends are married and starting families, so I am definitely a late bloomer in my circle, and I am 30 years old!! So yes, was he worth the wait 28 years into my life when I met him?! Absolutely. Will he continue to be worth the ‘wait’?! Absolutely. But feeling powerless in a situation where the ball is in his court is tough. Now I will go back to NOT waiting on this very nice sweetest day 🙂

Post # 11
Member
1979 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I think all of us have these days… and that’s fine!!  Today SO and I visited mutual friends in the hospital who just had their first child- and it was great!  But I couldn’t help but think that they were engaged when SO I and started dating and now they got married, bought a house, got a dog, and had their first kid… and in that same time SO and I are STILL JUST DATING!  Feelings like this pass- just remember that what you have is worth the wait!!

Post # 12
Member
1404 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@MissGreenBean:  You’ll be able to keep yourself busy with Maid/Matron of Honor duties for a few months so that’ll help pass the time. But I can empathise with waiting and wanting it so bad. Your time will come, you just have to be patient.

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