(Closed) Just wondering, what are the biggest things you HATE about other peoples wedding

posted 11 years ago in Beehive
Post # 137
2432 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Did anyone mention the Dollar Dance on their hate list. I hate that and consistently refuse to participate.

Post # 138
661 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - The Mountain Terrace, Woodside, CA

I just read all the posts, hilarious! So glad we’re springing for the full open bar and not having a time gap!

I’ve only really been bothered by one thing at a wedding, it was my cousin’s wedding 4 years ago, and it was at a very fancy hotel. To carry on the ‘fancy’ theme, the dining tables were decked out with soooo much stuff!  Like 10 pieces of silverware each, double layered chargers, about 5 different glasses per setting, and then huge overflowing centerpieces. There was literally no place to even put our escort cards down, the tables were so damn full! And then when it came time to eat, at least 3 people ended up knocking over full glasses, trying to navigate through the clutter on the table to reach their bread plate!

Post # 139
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I’ve been to many weddings lately, and for some reason none of them had assigned seatings. I hated that…you walk in and you’re looking around trying to find a good seat, and everyone is doing the exact same, and it just becomes a mess!

Although I’ve never gone to a wedding that had one, but cash bars would be a BIG no no for me.

Also, in all the weddings I’ve been to, the couple didn’t really interact with the guesrs that much (actually, the brides would only dance/interact with the wedding party) and I thought that was a little disrespectfull…

…Oh, and a 6 course meal! Good lord…we were seating down for probably 3-4 hrs just eating! I could not take it anymore and everyone at the table sort of ran out of things to say to each other.

Post # 140
948 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2020 - Coyaba Resort, Montego Bay

 Bad Vegetarian food.  

But, I’m not there for the food…so I can manage for one night 😉 

It would have to be Loooong gaps between ceremony & reception, hands down.


Post # 141
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

Bouquet tosses!

But I’m a Mrs. now, so I don’t have to sweat that anymore.

Post # 142
512 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

electric slide and any other group dance is banned from my wedding. so are pre-printed napkins and favors (sorry i hate those things) Im Cuban-American and I had a quince with all those goodies – so I rather not go the route for my wedding – it’s just tacky for adults I think. And those themed favors ( like pear/pods or whatever) sorry they annoy me. Be unique come up with your own stuff.

 To sum up my response – Cookie Cutter Weddings. argh.

and especially in hot miami = formal weddings when you are outside (that’s crazy)

ours is semi-formal, suits & tea length dresses makes sense to me. makes things to stuffy i think.

Post # 143
6659 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

1) The lighting: I hate it when it’s too bright at the reception, not a good atmosphere for strutting your stuff on the dance floor. My Fiance and I once went behind the bride and groom’s back at a wedding and asked the hotel staff to dim the lights because we felt so uncomfortable – it was operating room bright.

2) The Music: I understand there is an older crowd to please at most weddings, but that doesn’t mean you should play "brown eyed girl" and "runaround Sue" the entire time!

3) The Reception venue being located any more than 15 minutes from the hotel(s), especially if people are from out of town and you haven’t booked group transportation. I went to a nightmare wedding once where the reception venue was 45 minutes from the hotel – the bride and groom were nice enough to book us a shuttle bus, but there was only 1 trip there and 1 trip back so if you missed it, too bad! And if you were tired and wanted to sleep, no luck (I fell asleep in a chair waiting for the bus, not because I was passed out drunk but it was 2am and the bus was scheduled to leave at 2:30).

4) The Bride and Groom not eventually greeting me at the reception if there is no receiving line. This just shows a lack of class and poor taste.

5) Being seated at the kids table after not being invited with a date. I know, I know, I shouldn’t be upset by this because it’s ‘their day’ but it really pisses me off!

6) This one makes it kind of interesting (esp if you are not very close or do not like the happy couple), but an MIA or inappropriate groom. I’ve seen both on separate occasions. Both Grooms clearly did not want to get married, the one guy kept going outside to smoke and the bride was by herself almost all night (we had to track him down eventually for the best man’s speech and then he was off again right after). The other groom made a very inappropriate speech trying to ‘joke’ about the real fact that he was forced to marry his wife by her and her parent’s constant prodding since he was afraid of commitment (not funny). I have never felt so uncomfortable at a wedding before, and we all still talk about it years later as the worst thing we’ve ever seen at a wedding!

Post # 144
303 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I hate looooong speeches! Especially if the speaker is a little tipsy. I also hate speeches where the person obviously didn’t think about what they’re going to say. At FI’s cousin’s wedding a few months ago, every single person in the bridal party stood up and gave a speech, and they all said (more or less) "Thanks for coming everyone. Congratulations to Mr. & Mrs. Newlywed, I love you guys." Except for the Maid/Matron of Honor, who started her speech with "We’ve been best friends for a long time and I’ve seen you with a lot of guys…" Ouch!

I don’t really see the problem with an open bar though. We plan to have champagne and a couple beers per guest, but after that, if they want to get plastered it will be on their dime!

Post # 145
168 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I hate listing things I dislike about weddings because I think just about everything that’s on someone’s "hate" list can work really well in the right circumstances or it’s completely expected in someone’s region/among their circle of friends/family.

For instance, the cash bar that everyone hates – and I’m not a huge fan either, heck, it would be great to get free drinks – but I won’t dismiss it as "tacky" because I know in a lot of areas it’s just what’s done and no one considers an open bar. Likewise, if someone’s having a small, budget friendly wedding and they tell the guests about the cash bar, is it really that big of a deal? I’d hope my loved ones would be a little understanding of my financial situation if I had been forced to have a cash bar. Now, I completely understand the annoyance when it’s clear that "cost" was not a factor in the bride’s designer dress, the reception hall, decor, etc.

And we did do a couple of the things that people dislike on this thread, although not many of them. We had the dollar dance, since it’s highly expected at weddings in our area, and really, it’s a dollar, and it’s about giving the bride and groom a fun opportunity to interact with their guests. Fortunately for me, I don’t believe any of my guests assumed the worst of DH and I and regarded the dance as a grab for money.

And we didn’t do a lot of the things that are on the list, like the bouquet/garter toss, etc., but I completely understand that in some circles that tradition is the highlight of the night, that everyone gets into it and it’s a lot of fun! Meh, bottom line, we all do what’s right for us and I hope no one takes this list too seriously because annonymous online people don’t know you, don’t know your reasons for doing something at your wedding, and they don’t know what’s expected in your area or among your family. No worries!

Post # 146
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

@Loveatfirstsightlover: Personally, I think this thread is funny because it’s frank, unapologetic, and is mostly about hearing people describe their peeves in a humourous way.  That’s what I get out of it anyway.  I think it would be a mistake for a bride to read this thread and make any changes to her wedding.  We’re just being wacky, I think!

Post # 147
10216 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

I hate when guests don’t bring gifts.  When they RSVP and don’t show up.  I really hate when the couple whispers to each other during their vows and everyone is struggling to hear what they are saying, not romantic, not sexy, ANNOYING.

When the wedding is running late and yuo ar waiting for an hour or more for the ceremony to start.

Post # 148
133 posts
Blushing bee

My complaints are mostly logistical things that make the experience uncomfortable for the guests:

1) outdoor ceremonies under a blazing hot sun or in extreme humidity

2) not enough food or having to wait a really long time to eat. You don’t have to serve really fancy, gourmet food, but do make sure there is enough basic chicken or pasta meals so your guests don’t leave hungry. Also, make sure the waitstaff staggers the buffet so that it isn’t empty by the time the last table gets served.

3) not enough seating at a cocktail reception

4) too many traditions (bouquet toss, garter toss, special dances with father/ mother/ other relatives/ long toasts) to the point where there isn’t much unstructured time where the guests can just dance and enjoy themselves

5) lots of drunk, rowdy people (sorry not my scene). This one is usually correlated with not having enough food.

6) pastor getting on a soapbox during the sermon and offending some of the guests (e.g. marriage should be between one man and one woman, divorced people are failures because they didn’t try hard enough, a woman should be subservient to her husband)

Post # 149
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

My cousin’s played only dance/trance music SO loud during their reception. Only the bride, groom, and bridal party (their friends) were dancing. The other 95% of the guest list was sitting around. I personally was covering my ears (I was a kid at that time). We all thought that was so rude and inconsiderate! If you are going to throw a party at your house, you wouldn’t play something as obnoxious as music such that 95% of the people there are uncomfortable and annoyed. You would try to make everyone happy by mixing it up and playing a variety of music. Why should your wedding reception be any different? It is only a big party, after all.

People like to say, "It’s YOUR wedding, do what YOU want." I completely agree with that in terms of the actual WEDDING, but in terms of the RECEPTION, it is just a party celebrating your wedding, so you should try to make EVERYONE feel welcomed, not only yourself & a select few of your friends!

Post # 150
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

In light of my recent experience as a Bridesmaid or Best Man, I’m going to add to this thread PSYCHOTIC MOTHERS OF THE BRIDE who yell at their daughters and their daughters friends and tell everyone it is "their wedding because they paid for it." The woman was seriously the Antichrist – AND she officiated. Go figure.

Post # 151
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2007

Kittyachi – I’m with you on the psychotic MOB. My mom was one of them and almost ruined my wedding for me!

My other big pet peeve is DJs talking over the music constantly. Just shut up and let people enjoy the music!

That being said, you can’t please everyone. There will always be someone who doesn’t like some part of your wedding. As long as you enjoy it, that’s what matters!

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