(Closed) Keep crying

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

There will be two times in your life when you’re going to be very concerned about “doing it right” and everyone else will think they should have a say in how you do it.  The first is when you get married, and the second is when you have kids.  🙂  I think I can speak for every bride on this forum that we’ve all had to deal with overbearing advice from family members.  So keep your head up, because you’re not alone!

Post # 4
Member
929 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I had a similar situation, where everything was overwhelming me.  I work at a hospital, and one of the social workers I work with referred me to her friend who was a therapist.  At first I was otally leary of going.  But I went (to appease my co-worker), and I found out that for me, it was so relieving to be able to express all my concerns to a third party who wasn’t my family/friends or Fiance.  I was able to let everything out, and she helped me to sort it out.  It took a few sessions but now I never worry about the wedding/get upset.  For me, it was the best thing I did.  I know its not for everyone but I hear you girl- I have been there!  

Post # 7
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I think what you’re going through is normal.  You might be feeling overwhelmed because the whole process is just so overwhelming.  For the first month or so after I got engaged, I was a stressed-out mess.  So much planning to get started on!  Every little thing will doubtless offend someone!  Every vendor is so expensive!  I’m usually a pretty calm person, and normally not at all into wedding details, and it still brought me down.  Now that you’re getting some of the big stuff (i.e., venue) nailed down, maybe you’ll feel like things are more under control soon?  That’s what finally helped me (well, that and feeling bad about inflicting my sudden stressballness on my very sweet fiance).

As far as feeling sensitive/easily offended — weddings are weird in that, in one sense, it’s a very personal thing, getting married.  But it’s also incredibly social for most people, with large amounts of family and friends turning up and — we worry — judging what we do.  But people will either be generally happy for you and supportive of how you do things, or they’ll spend lots of time nitpicking and whining about the details.  And I find people in the nitpicking/whining category usually looooove being offended, so if they’re unhappy with your decisions, in a way, you are doing them a favor by giving them an excuse to be affronted.

Hang in there!  I hope the process gets more enjoyable for you soon!

Post # 8
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I did a lot of crying in the early days of my engagement!  I’m a crier by nature, but it does seem weird to be upset when you’re supposed to be on Cloud Nine, right?  But getting married is a life change – a big one.  Your emotions are going to go up and down a lot throughout this wedding planning process.  And it certainly doesn’t help when family members and friends add to the stress by chiming in with their opinions at every turn.  Definitely check in with your doc, but I think what you are going through is completely normal!  Hang in there!

Post # 9
Member
762 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Welcome to wedding planning! And wedding bee. I get the same way sometimes. Our parents are very opinionated and sometimes I wonder who’s getting married. Very true what another poster said about the 2 times in your life when people just have to state their opinions. Don’t worry, it’s not this stressful all the time. Try to ignore the pointless comments!

Post # 11
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Well, I have been crying A LOT so I think it is normal. I got this book called “Emotionally Engaged: A Bride’s Guide to Surviving the ‘Happiest’ Time of Her Life” and it REALLY helped. Basically the book explains why the engagement/wedding planning/wedding process is so emotional, and gives examples of real life brides. It helped me a lot and it is still helping me.

http://www.emotionallyengaged.com/

 

 

Post # 12
Member
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Oh that is exactly how I have been, and I got engaged just over a month ago.  We have almost secured a venue for our reception which will give us the exact date that we will be married!  I think just doing that will make me feel better and really make this wedding real in my mind.  I know there is a lot to do, but I have a wonderfully supportive Fiance and I know we will get through this busy and exciting time together (even if there are a few rough patches!).  Sometimes I just need to stop, breathe, and think about what I want.  Talking with my Fiance about what is bothering me always seems to help too!

Post # 13
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

((hugs)) Aww hang in there, everything will be alright! I am sure they are just super excited and pumped about your wedding, and are wanting to help out as much as possible. I know things seem a little bit hard, especially in the wedding planning process, but things really will have a wonderful ending! Keep your head held high, and just remember, nothing can be repeated again, and just remember all the great memories that you are going to have of this very special time!

Post # 14
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I am SO empathetic to your issues here! I am having anxiety attacks left and right. My family is downright embarrassing. Don’t get me wrong, I’m an awesome person and they are lucky to have me, but when they meet my extended family, they are going to worry about the gene pool i sprang from. Lol.

Deep breaths. Remember, he loves YOU! And they will too. You can’t control your family, and they will just have to deal with it!

You will do fine. =) Keep your head up and be yourself.

Post # 15
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2010

My wedding is in 3 days and I have been a constant mess.  I have so many things left to do and all the stress is really adding up.  I’ve ugly cried about twice this week and regular cried almost everyday.  I got to say though, I always feel really great afterwards.

Post # 16
Member
93 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I have been engaged for 2 months (tomorrow) and I find myself crying a lot too.  Every time I think about it or read about them (weddings), or see pictures.  I don’t think I am sad, but I guess I just am overwhelmed by emotion.  Anyway, I did a search on here to see if I am the only one doing this, because I was starting to think I was a freak!  I hope I don’t really become a wreck when I start getting into the real planning.

The topic ‘Keep crying’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors