- 6 years ago
- Wedding: December 2013
I have a long time friend (we’re talking like, 15 years here). We’ll call her Nicole. I love Nicole dearly, but she’s a huge hippy. Which hey, is fine with me. Not my cup of tea, but whatever works. Even though my wedding is VERY formal, I could care less about how she looks when she shows up. She has huge long dreads, tattoos, etc. Doesn’t matter to me in the least. I don’t give a shit what she looks like. She’s my friend.
This is where it gets a little more complicated. Nicole will be having a baby this January. Awesome for her, I’m genuinely happy for her, and I know she’ll be an awesome mom. I love Nicole and I want to see her baby, so I said Baby can come to my wedding as well. He will be 11 months old, so it’s unlikely he’ll be too fussy at that age. Nicole is really hard on money, since she will be a single mom with lots of student debt. For a shower gift, I bought her an 18 month old suit. This cute little mini-tux. I figured, he’ll be 11 months at the time of my wedding. Nicole LOVES sewing, so the plan is that she will just alter the suit if it’s way too big on him.
On top of the suit, I also booked Nicole her own room at my venue. It was super important to me that she be at my wedding, and I knew that I was taking a risk with the baby being there. I wanted to be as accommodating as possible, so I went as far as to get her her very own room for the night. I have no issue with doing this. Again, she’s my friend. But the room was $295 for the night (which I completely paid and reserved), so it wasn’t cheap.
Nicole and I have been talking on Facebook recently, and the topic of breastfeeding came up. She plans on breastfeeding until Baby is like, 2. I was supportive- whatever floats your boat. Nicole then continued on to say that Baby will obviously be breastfeeding at my wedding. I was again supportive, and said that I knew that, which was another reason why I booked her a room for the night. I wanted to be as accommodating as possible for her.
Long story short, Nicole says that if baby gets fussy, she won’t leave the ceremony. But rather, will whip out a boob and start feeding him then and there. I’m totally fine with her feeding her kid breast milk during my ceremony, or reception, or whatever- but for the love of God, can she not pump?! I made the comment, “oh, well you can totally pump in your room! I even spoke with my wedding planner, and they said that they can warm up or sterilize bottles for you at any time.” Her response was, “No, it’s fine, I don’t want to bottle feed him. There’s no point when I can do it from my body.”
Uh, okay. And the thing is that I could even get PAST the breastfeeding thing, if she was the type of person who would wear one of those “cover-things” (sorry moms, no idea what they’re called…they basically cover your boob so you can breast feed in public). No, she won’t do that either. She thinks it implies that you’re being ashamed of breastfeeding. She then took it like 234353453 steps FARTHER, and made jokes about squirting milk on people. Yeah, she was joking, I get it. But still, I was already semi-irked about this.
Ultimately my issue is that I have 2 photographers and a videographer. I have a small guest list. I just want her to KEEP HER BOOB IN, so my wedding album doesn’t have her in the background with her nipple peeking out. My photography will come to a LOT of money. I really splurged on it. I feel like I have gone out of my way to make sure that Nicole can breastfeed in her own private area. Not a bathroom, but her own room.
Am I being a bridezilla about this? Or am I being reasonable?