(Closed) Keeping your husband interested in you sexually

posted 5 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
7211 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

Wanting to be single again and doing the same thing in bed are two VERY different things. Single men go home alone most nights, have to cook their own crappy meals, are bored sitting alone, and have little motivation to better themselves. My SO loves being in a relationship for THOSE reasons. The fact that we have good sex just happens to be icing on the cake. 

Support your man, challenge him, do fun things (outside bed) with him. He won’t want to be single. If he only likes vanilla sex… give him vanilla sex. You can also make a night “just about him” if you want to change things up without being too spicy. Every once in a while my SO gets so much attention he’s left with NO energy to take care of me… which is exactly the point. 🙂

Post # 5
664 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I think you should take what he said at face value. If he said he’s happy and that you’re the best, he probably means it.

Also, I can’t imagine my Darling Husband wanting to go back to single days. I can guarantee that the 3-4x/week that he gets at home is way more than what he was getting in his single days and way more thn what his single friends are getting now. There’s not a single thing wrong with committed, monogamous sex, nor with plain old vanilla. 

Post # 6
839 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@anon00:  My SO and I have talked about this before (when talking about other people, not necessarily just Us), and he brought up a good point. No matter how sexy or charismatic your guy is, he’s probably having sex more often as a married man than he would if he was single. Single guys are lots and lots of talk when it comes to sex, but at the end of the day, most of them are going home alone. Of course single guys get the occasional hookup, but think about it, most single guys aren’t hooking up with a new girl once or twice every week, but I bet most (young) married men are having sex that much at least, and it’s way less work for them to get there! there’s a reason single guys like to brag every time they have sex, its because it doesn’t happen very often.

As long as you aren’t “holding out” on something he wants to do (and it doesn’t sound like you are), I don’t think you have anything to worry about as far as him wanting to “live the single life.” But I understand feeling insecure, because I do sometimes, too, but it made me feel better when he told me these things, and it makes total sense, so I thought it might make you feel better too! 🙂

Post # 9
569 posts
Busy bee

@anon00:  honestly… men aren’t very sexually complicated. if they’re getting it, they’re happy. we’re the sexually complicated ones! just my opinion

Post # 10
481 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@anon00:  Based on what he told you I think it’s pretty safe to say he’s legit still interested in you and it doesn’t sound like you have anything to worry about.

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