- 7 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
I am thinking about kicking a bridesmaid out of my wedding. Let me give a little history so you can understand why…
I was very close to this friend b/c her and i worked together, but we had a great relationship outside of work. I told her all the time that i was going to have her as my Maid/Matron of Honor when my fiance proposed. She ended up leaving our place of employment, and her and lost touch almost immediatley. I then found out a HUGE secret that she was keeping from me for the three years that we were friends.. Some SO upsetting and devastating, that I just decided not to speak to her b/c i was so caught off guard and hurt. I would hear from her from time-to-time, but it was mostly asking me if i could do something for her. That was from Jan-May — In May, I got engaged, and told her immediately that she wasn’t going to be the Maid/Matron of Honor and I chose another friend of mine b/c I was the Maid/Matron of Honor in her wedding, and it felt like the right thing to do. She was upset, and threw a hissy fit, and bad mouthed the new Maid/Matron of Honor — I was a little ticked b/c A. You dont talk about MY friends like that (I wouldnt let anyone talk about her!) and B. You haven’t even been present in my life other than asking me to do things for you!
So, I saw her once after I got engaged, and she didnt bother asking to see my ring, or about the engagement, or anything. So, for three months, her and I barely spoke, then she called me saying it was “in her spirit to call me”. I called her back, she didnt answer, but she text me, and we let everything out over text messages. I told her I knew her HUGE secret, and was upset, and she said she thought I did, and she was sorry, but didn’t want to tell me b/c she didnt want me telling anyone else (if you knew me, you know i wouldnt do that crap to friends, but whatever). In the end, she asked me if she was in the wedding, so, I said YES… I said yes b/c at that moment, it felt like the right thing to do… I also said yes b/c I saw this convo as a step into the right direction… and at first, it was.
We chatted more, and she even went dress shopping with me, but… when she went dress shopping, i saw a side of her that i knew existed, but I did NOT want around me during my wedding day (or the days approaching). She was mean to the dress shop lady, she was bossy to me, her child was running around acting like a lunatic (WHY IS YOUR CHILD WITH YOU ANYWAY?!?! She didnt even TELL me she was coming!! She didnt even ASK! )… As if dress shopping isn’t stressful enough, I had her, and her daughter, creating complete chaos… THEN.. the kicker…….. SHE TRIED ON A DRESS!!!!! Now, this wasn’t my FIRST time going (it was my second) but it totally ruined the entire experience. I wanted to bond with her, but instead, i have her child stepping on the dresses, trying on veils, and screaming like a maniac, her, trying on dresses, throwing the dresses on the floor, pulling dresses that I dont even like or aren’t in my price range, and then, SHE TRIED ONE ON!?
Now, this may seemy pety, but here is the issue…that chaos she caused doing something so simple, WILL happen during my bachelorette party, my rehearsal dinner, my fittings, AND my wedding… I didn’t think she would let that side shine on something that small, but she did, so can you imagine what will happen on the wedding day??
Now, here is the other kicker… My fiance decided not to ask a cousin of his to be in the wedding, and although I am totally cool w/ having an uneven wedding party, I kinda just want to boot her, and not worry about it.
Suggestions? Thoughts? Ideas?