(Closed) Kid free … except an infant?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Invite the infant to an otherwise child-free wedding?
    Let him come. The other parents are unlikely to complain since he's an infant. : (16 votes)
    53 %
    Let him come. Who cares if anyone complains - it's your wedding. : (9 votes)
    30 %
    Don't invite him, realizing that this guarantees his mom won't attend, either. : (4 votes)
    13 %
    Some other option in the comments. (Note: the parents are unwilling to use a babysitter.) : (1 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    2867 posts
    Sugar bee

    Definitely let him come, it’s at your discretion!  Furthermore, I doubt anyone will bat an eye unless the infant is crying and I’m sure it’ll be sleeping most of the time anyways.

    Post # 4
    476 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    If you’re okay with him being there, then let him come it’s your wedding and you get to decide who can come, otherwise, why don’t you talk to your friend about your policy.  They may have another idea.

    Post # 5
    4765 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

    I vote let him come! Most people won’t care since he is an infant. If there are any people that care, I feel like that’s not a big deal. You’re doing what’s best for that family, and the other people can just get over it. 🙂

    Post # 6
    950 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Definitely let him come…4 month old infants are usually working through the sitting up stage, let along crawl.  He’s basically an appendage to his mother, & she’ll be leaving periodically (with or without him) if she’s breast feeding in order to pump or feed.  Just make sure to reserve her a seat near an exit if he gets fussy or unwelcomely noisy & make sure that your venue has a place for her to feed & change him where it will be least obstructive to the rest of the guests.

    Especially let him come if you like his mom & want her to show up.

    Post # 7
    3125 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    tiny quiet little babies are ok – now, it’s the 2-10 year olds that you should watch out for. they’re sneaky!

    Post # 8
    721 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I voted to let him come.  We are also having a child-free wedding (no one under 20).  But if a close friend needed to bring an infant or not go, I’d much rather her bring the infant.  It won’t be any additional cost to you, and she’ll probably end up leaving early anyways.  I think the other parents should know the difference between a 5 year old child and a breastfeeding (or otherwise) infant.

    Post # 9
    327 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2000

    I’d definitely let him come. It’s unreasonable, even at a kid free wedding, to expect new moms to leave their infants home. Especially if it is out of town. I’m sure they’ll be grateful for your understanding, and will be considerate if the baby is crying during the ceremony.

    Post # 10
    4123 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    We are doing a no kids wedding. We will have the flower girls and ring bearers… and allow nursing infants…. ONLY! Not toddlers, just nursing infants.

    Infants realistically CANT be left alone. Sure, you can pump or what not, but the only real infants that will be around will be 1st babies.. lol. I do not expect a mother who needs to pump or feed for her own comfort to NOT bring their baby.

    If anyone has an issue with that, they can take it up with me! 🙂

    In fact, we just found out that one of FI’s friends (barely missed the Groomsmen cut 🙂 and his wife are pregnant! They had a miscarriage about a year ago and it’s been really hard on them, but they took a trip to St. Lucia to get their relationship back.. and well… Baby came with! They are due 1 month before our wedding! We can’t wait to have their baby there.

    Post # 11
    248 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    Parents are the ones who know best the difference between a kid and an infant.  They should understand.  And you’re already drawing a line between kid and teenager, so it makes sense to further delineate and allow infants.  People who complain at that will be complaining at anything you do, even if you allow their kids (oh, Jimmy’s so bored, you didn’t provide the right toys, etc).  What I am going to do is mention to the few parents that are coming that “I’m glad I don’t even have to worry about you letting your kid disrupt the ceremony, I’m lucky to have such considerate friends” or something like that. 

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