(Closed) Kids! Some yes, some not, please be okay with this!

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1075 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

That’s what my parents did with my brothers wedding.  Only a couple of my aunts and uncles were allowed to bring their kids (my cousins) and some were not invited only because my brothers werent that close to them.  I plan to do the same thing at mine as well.

Post # 5
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

It is your wedding and you and Fiance can invite whomever you want to invite. that being said, expect some people being frustrated and unhappy about the exclusions. I have always heard that its all or nothing with perhaps the only exception being the kids in the bridal party. That’s what we did and we were very honest and open with that from the beginning (told people in the save the dates) and we still got a lot of crap for it. Now that the wedding is over, I can say that I absolutely do not regret only having our niece and nephews in the wedding and not inviting any other kids.  We set our limit at all aunts and uncles and first cousins. No cousins kids were invited and no kids of friends.

I think whatever you and Fiance decide to do be prepared to stick to it. You will absolutely have people asking you to make one more exception and that will open up a can of worms. And be prepared to have some people not come because of it…If you are okay with all of that, go for it!! Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

I don’t see anything wrong with only inviting children that you are close too.  I think this whole thing of having to invite kids or anyone else because someone else is invited is crazy.  Most of us don’t have unlimited budgets.  I don’t know if people will be upset or not, but it seems like people get upset no matter what you do.  Enjoy your day.

Post # 7
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

I do want to amend that to say I wouldn’t leave just one or two kids out but otherwise I think it’s fine.

Post # 8
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

If you invite one child, you must invite all of them. There is no way to get around that without offending people. Also, 18+ is an adult, not a kid. As far as adults are concerned, you are under no obligation to invite anyone whom you do not want in attendance. Only invite those nearest and dearest to you and send announcements to everyone else.

Post # 9
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I don’t believe that you have to invite all children just because you invite some.  I am only inviting children of people we are close to… and that’s it.  There are a handful of children that I couldn’t imaging not being there.  But  there would be WAY too many children to invite everyone’s and it would seem more like we were at Chuck E Cheese than a wedding.

Post # 10
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I also agree that people will be upset about their kids not being invited but who cares?  I personally don’t understand why people want to bring their kids to a wedding anyway.  They get bored too easily and parents can’t have a good time if they’re chasing kids around.

Post # 11
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

@Summer, many people consider weddings to be family events. Just because one child may not enjoy events where they are required to behave doesn’t mean that all children will think they are being punished by attending. The same way that some adults enjoy weddings while others hate them with every fiber of their being. Don’t lump everyone of a certain age range into the same mindset because they are all individuals with their own likes and dislikes, regardless of what other people think they should enjoy or hate. I’ve attended lots of weddings where the kids were having more fun than the adults.

Post # 12
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

I’m not sure the isssue is whether or not the kids will enjoy themselves.  I think the issue is that there is a limit to the amount of people that can be invited.  I’m sure some kids, especially girls, would like to go to a wedding.  But they ‘ll have plenty of time to go to weddings when they are older. If someone can’t afford to invite all the kids or just doesn’t want alot of children they are not close too I don’t see why that is wrong.

Post # 13
Member
941 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

the only children we are inviting are two nieces who are in the wedding party. Some of my cousins have young children and I know they will understand when I don’t invite their children to the wedding. I also have a aunt who will probably be extremely upset and throw a fit when I don’t invite her children, but I’m holding to this and if this means she isn’t going to come, fine! I’d rather not have her there telling me what kind of wedding we should have than spend $60 a plate for her children that won’t eat the food anyhow. (a lot of that is personal, however. if it were up to me, i wouldn’t invite her anyway!)

 

i know that my wedding just wont be suited for children. with it being an evening event, lots of alcohol and some wild friends, i would rather keep the kids safe at home!

Post # 14
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

Who feeds a child a $60 plate of adult food anyway? Alot of adults don’t even like the adult options. Countless catering companies, even the most formal, serve kids’ meals with kid-friendly food  in small portions that won’t go to waste for a very small fee per person.

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