Post # 1
My fiance and I have been together for over eight years and engaged for a year and a half. Our wedding is now less than four months away. I always imagined what it would be like to be engaged – being invested in the wedding planning and beginning a fitness routine. What’s weird is that since I’ve been engaged I’ve actually completely abandoned my once vigorice gym routine and procrastinate on picking our decorations or planning our ceremony.
I am really excited about being married to the love of my life. I just don’t know why I’m not being carried away by “wedding fever”. I know all the tasks I need to do and I think “oh we have six months to do that” but now its getting close and I can’t use time as an excuse.
Whenever friends or family ask about a certain aspect of the wedding like how will you do your hair etc. I still say I don’t know. I’m the total opposite of a bridezilla.
Has anyone else found that they seem to be lacking that planning drive? How can I be more motivated and get in the spirit? This is a once in a lifetime milestone and I don’t think I’m revelling in it like I should be and I don’t want to regret it later.
Post # 2
How is your mood otherwise? Are you feeling overwhelmed? It sounds like there may be something else going on that’s keeping you from being your usual productive self. Even if there’s lots to do, you can still approach it one thing at a time.
Post # 3
I feel similar. We have already put the date back twice and although I have an idea of pretty much everything I want, I haven’t really set anything in motion yet. I know people judge us for putting the date back (mainly family) but it is nothing to do with our relationship, fear of committement to each other, just the idea of having to have all the finances by that date, dealing with the logistics etc is really overwhelming to me. Have you thought of perhaps hiring a co-ordinator? It is an extra cost, but anyone I know who has gotten one has sworn by it, and also managed to save money in other areas due to the co-ordinator being wedding savvy. We are looking at the pros vs cons of getting one at the moment. I am not naturally a party planner, even hosting Christmas this year just for family almost had me in a panic attack. Not everyone is naturally prepared to plan a wedding.
As for the fitness, well I have always been a fitness procrastinator, am a smoker and luckily have good genes so I am naturally slim, so I can’t help you there lol.
Good luck, breath! And try and break down everything into manageable goals etc: this week I will reasearch after work every day and by Sunday I will know what hairstyle/makeup I want.
Post # 4
I just changed jobs so I spent the past few months preoccupied with a job search and finishing up a distance-ed class. For the past month I things have calmed down and I have more free time. I thought time was the problem, but now that I have more I’m still not getting the wedding bug. I also live in a different city than my friends and family, so I feel like I don’t have people to “wedding stuff” with other than my fiance. He is a fulltime student and works part time so I spent a lot of my evenings left to my own devices. I eat more junk food than I used to and abandoned working out about six months ago. I always have good intentions of getting back into my old healthy habits or of tackling wedding tasks, but then I get home and do absolutely nothing! I’m frustrated with myself.
Post # 5
It sounds like you’re in the process of a lot of life changes. Even if your social network isn’t always available to you, you can still enjoy your alone time and be productive. Find a wedding task that is most exciting to you, and start working on that to get the ball rolling. As for working out again, maybe you can try a new fitness class or buy a new workout outfit for motivation. Savor the moment!
Post # 6
Don’t hate me. In gender roles you sound like a stereotypical guy. You don’t diet. You aren’t into planning. You might be a groom! I’m teasing but you job is demamding. Your life is busy. I’m sure you’re beautiful. you eat what you want. Be healthy and happy. Plan you wedding as you both seem fit. You’ll be an awesome super laid back bride. Those are the best weddings anyway 🙂 Enjoy life and do what you want to do.
Post # 7
Motivation to plan/exercise is similar to libido and sex. The less you do it, the less you miss it, and conversely the more you do it the more you want it. Exercise actually gives you MORE energy and makes you feel more ‘in your body’, so the best way to get back into a routine is to just force yourself into starting it – once you’ve got the ball rolling, its easier to maintain the motivation. I think planning, too, can seem overwhelming when viewed from a distance, as a giant mountain that must be scaled, but if you were to just dive in and start working on some aspect that interests you – maybe you really like flowers, or design – I bet you will get pulled in.