- 2 years ago
- Wedding: December 2019
It’s about to get hyper personal but I’d love your opinion on what the heck might be going on. 🙂
I’ve been living with my SO for several years now and the whole time we were dating (about 6 years before living together) his sex drive was damn near annoying levels of high, mine was id say average. It worked itself out to us doing the deed about 3 times a week + . This routine has been going strong the whole time except the last year or so.
It slowly started to taper off until it’s current state which is about once (kind of, read below) every 3 months. It is coming from his end of things, he doesn’t want to or when we try he can’t seem to “finish”.
Ive talked extensively about this with him and the reasons I’m told are either a. Stress , b. Medical issues (sick n so forth), c. It’s so hyped up now he doesn’t want to let me down, d. It’s super sensitive and starts hurting after a bit.
What he means by these are: he’s stressed about general life things or finances (both are fine but he is WAY to in his head constantly), the last 2 months he’s had vertigo and ear ringing that meds aren’t helping with, and I’ve run the gambit of emotional responses on the matter so yup it’s hyped up and the sensitive thing I think is bs because it’s never been that way in his entire life but I don’t have a penis so okayyy
Ive ruled out some things: no, there isn’t another woman. No he’s not gay (lol, yes, I asked), yes he’s still attracted to me (read below) and yes his penis still works.
Here’s where it gets odd, while we don’t have sex every day on average about 10 times he will go to grope me, make a sexual comment about me, etc. he’s always done these things but I figured they would stop if he wasn’t interested/once sex wasn’t on his mind.
So heres where I need your opinions: wth is going on?!! And how to bring it back around?
ive tried to minimalize his stress and to make his environment as peaceful as can be but honestly he’s stressed about things that either are basic life things or things that just simply aren’t as bad as he’s made it out to be in his mind. For example: he will be worried about money when that month he made 17k and expenses are only 5k (I’m serious, he was literally freaking out about how he made too much money that month. Uh…..)
I’ve tried to initiate (admittedly I’m bad at this) and we will start but shortly after he will “get sensitive” and we have to stop with him saying “we will try again tomorrow” ::facepalm::
im to the point where I’m starting to feel like he hates me (I know it’s silly) but damn society still has me thinking my worth is somehow tied up in if he’s happy or not. It’s stupid.
Thanks for taking the time to read this 🙂