- 5 years ago
Just curious, and how long did it take him to get the hint(buy the ring)?
Just curious, and how long did it take him to get the hint(buy the ring)?
I didn’t drop “hints”, when we were talking more about getting engaged, I told him I didn’t know for sure what I wanted and would he mind if we looked at rings together for ideas. My now husband didn’t mind and picked a ring of nicer quality than the one I told him I liked and I’m happy with my ring. You’re more likely to get what you like if you’re upfront about it. We got engaged a few months after we looked at rings together.
He started hinting to me. He’d be on his laptop next to me and would pull up jewelry websites and ask what styles I like. After he did this a couple times, he asked if I wanted to look at rings with him. We were engaged about 6 months after we met, so it wasn’t a long process.
I loved one designer in particular and he knew that. I eventually showed him my dream ring and he wouldnt consider anything else after that.
@Helloemi: My fiance and I started talking somewhat seriously about getting engaged about 2.5 years ago. We’d been together for about 3.5 years at that point. He asked me what type of rings I liked, and I showed him some pictures online.
We both wanted to live together for a while before getting engaged, though. His lease was up a few months after we started seriously talking about getting engaged (mine was month-to-month at that point), and we got an apartment together when his lease was up.
We started talking about it seriously again after we’d been living together for about a year or so, and he asked me to email him more ring pictures. We’d been living together about 1.5 years when he asked me to go ring shopping with him. He decided he’d prefer I pick out the ring so he got the perfect one. After that, he placed the order for the ring I chose from Tacori and he proposed a couple of months later.
It was kind of a long process for us, but I’m glad we took our time. I wasn’t really into the whole marriage thing for the longest time, and I’m glad I didn’t feel pressured into it. Everyone’s different, though … Some girls would go crazy waiting close to 5.5 years to be engaged!
I agree with @Duckie731:, though … You should be upfront about what you want (especially if you’re picky at all). I also think it’s important to both be on the same page before you get engaged. As I said before, my fiance and I both felt really strongly that we should live together for a while before making such a big commitment. I know that’s not for everyone, but the important thing was that we were on the same page when it came to those types of expectations.
When we’d be sitting on the couch watching TV, I’d browse engagement rings on my laptop. When I saw one that I liked the general look of (and that fit within the budget he’d mentioned offhand previously), I’d “oooohhhh” and linger on that page so he could glance over if he felt inclined. He already knew I liked the idea of a garnet center stone (his birthstone), and I think he could have done a decent job picking the ring out himself (he knew I wanted a square stone, milgrain because that’s what’s on my parents’ wedding rings, etc.), but we ended up going shopping and picking out the ring together.
Something else you could do is go to a couple of jewelry store with a few girlfriends, and have them suggest to your boyfriend that if he ever goes ring shopping, they know exactly what you like.
My Fiance and I discussed engagement for about a year before it actually happened, and it took a few months of “oooooohhhh”ing over rings on the Internet before we actually went shopping.
@Helloemi: Hey! My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 5 years. He mentioned wanting to spend the rest of his life with me one drunken night several months into our relationship (lol) and we never really discussed it after that. That is… until in the last year or year and a half when our friends/acquaintances started to get engaged. We had been discussing our goals for the future and our priorities on and off throughout our relationship and have kind of known that we are right for each other, so that wasn’t an issue. Basically, I just flat-out told him I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him and that I would love to get engaged. I have very strict and over-bearing parents, so they would disown me if we had moved in together without being engaged. That said, he needed a good 6 months or so to get used to the idea of getting engaged/married. I kind of dragged him around looking at rings for a few months on and off, just to figure out what I liked. Unfortunately, I’m super picky and ended up hating almost everything I saw, so we ended up custom designing a ring. So we started semi-seriously looking at rings in October. We didn’t look again until January. Then, we looked again in February with the intent to purchase a ring. He put a down-payment on a ring some time late February or early March. It is still in the works, but he’s planning on proposing some time this summer. I hope this helps! I think the best way is to be direct about what you want, but that’s just what worked for me and my boyfriend 🙂
My fiance proposed with the diamond and then we got to pick out the setting together! He got the diamond from blue nile, which helps explain everything about diamond quality since he’s a boy and knew nothing about them! 🙂 It was great and I got my perfect dream ring. I always had it picked out but he wanted to do it more old fashioned and didn’t want any of my input beforehand. So he got what he wanted in a way I still did too!
In my opinion and experience, guys dont take sublte hints well. You have to tell them exactly what you are thinking. With that said, we started talking marriage and making sure we were both on the same page with our future. Once that discussion went well and I knew his timeline (he said he thought we would ne engaged within a year, we had been dating about 3 years at that time). Then I started looking at rings and showing him pics of ones I liked. About 3 months later I stopped into the jewelers with my mom and tried on a few like the ones I had shown him pics of….NOT at all what I wanted! I tried on a few others, halos, and fell in love. I now had to show him the haoo ring pics since that wasnt the style I showed him at all! I showed him a few pics. He ended up going back to the jewelers within a month, picked out the ring of my dreams, and proposed on Valentines Day last year:)
We looked at a jewelry store together early in our relationship, and when it came time, I sent him pictures of about 25 styles that I liked. He was originally under the impression that all girls want a big, princess cut solitare, which is far from my style.
@CandyKate: we just hit the 5 year mark too.
About two years in he said he was planning on proposing but right then a bunch of people we knew were all engaged and he didn’t want to hop into the middle of that… Yeah… So three years later… Still nothing. >:/
That being said, after he said that I pranced around looking at rings because I thought an engagement was coming, and realised that I don’t like ANYTHING in the stores either… I want something either custom or online(once was a round solitaire, then asscher, then round three stone… now a emerald cut halo… If he doesn’t ask soon I’m going to tell him I want 3cts!!![jk])
we’ve gone ring shopping together a couple times, all of which have ended in complete disaster…
He says he wants it to be a surprise. I really don’t want to be surprised anymore. I’m quite bitter, being told something was in the works when it wasn’t but since I’m super picky I want to drop some kind of hint along with some not so subtle “hurry it up, because I’m sick of obsessing about this and I won’t be able to stop until it happens.”
meh. I’m about to pull my hair out.
I told him I wanted a princess cut solitaire. That was my very subtle hint. He thought princess meant round LOL. So we went shopping together, I picked out the exact thing I wanted, and he went back a few days later and bought it, with a slightly bigger diamond.
I highly recommend just telling him what you want. Guys aren’t so good at the subtle hints.
@Helloemi: Awww! I just obsessed about it to my boyfriend. It was frustrating for him, which I feel really badly about, but it’s frustrating for me! I can’t help the way I feel, no matter how hard I try, so I definitely understand where you’re coming from. When was the last time you two talked seriously about getting engaged? I remember most of the times I took my boyfriend ring shopping ended in a disaster. Then, we had a serious conversation. Essentially, he felt like I was pressuring him and rushing him to start this whole process before he was ready (he’s also buying a car this summer and didn’t know that I wanted a simulant, so he was concerned about money). I told him that I really was having a hard time liking anything and I really just wanted him to be enthusiastic about this, because honestly, this is the only time we’re ever going to do this. Well, he got a sweet bonus and decided it was time. Maybe you should ask him what the hold-up is? Maybe you should tell him that this is important to you and that this is something you want to do together. I can understand why he would want to do this all on his own, but if you’re as picky as I am, you need to look together. Have you talked about a time line? I told my boyfriend some time last year, my walk date is June 25, which marks 5.5 years together. He told me he was going to do it July 1 after dinner and a movie (I don’t think it’s going to happen this way; he’s just saying things to throw me off). Otherwise, I would just head on over to the waiting board and check out Mr. Bee’s suggestions for getting engaged. Best of luck 🙂
@CandyKate: he has no hold up. literally. None. i’m scared he’s going to be the type that won’t propose until I’m pregnant.
I don’t want a huge wedding. I wanted a sim, but he insists on a diamond. There’s nothing that he really needs to buy and he has money.
we talk about it all the time. We own a house together. I’m good enough to have my name on the house but not to have his last name.
We’ve been together so long that getting married would literally change nothing. So I don’t get it.
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