(Closed) Ladies that chose your engagement ring. Do you regret it?

posted 6 years ago in Rings
  • poll: Do you regret picking your own ring out?



    We picked together

  • Post # 61
    1316 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    We looked together and made the final selection together. I knew exactly what ring I would be getting when he proposed, and I have absolutely no regrets. It was SO much fun picking it out together, and it was so exciting because we knew marriage was right around the corner. Most people actually don’t know that we picked the ring out together. I just chose to say that he did an awesome job (because he technically did buy it himself haha). The only people who know we picked it out together are some close friends and FI’s mom (because she tried to insult him via insulting the ring…so I stepped in to tell her that this is exactly the ring I wanted and she should remember that getting engaged isn’t about having a certain ring…it’s about the commitment.)

    Post # 62
    589 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    we shopped together and i ultimately picked both the setting and the diamond.  I wanted a very specific stone (AGS000) with specific color, clarity, mm size – he wanted it at a certain price and was more than happy to let me do the hunting so i would be happy and he would be happy.

    And with all the compliments i get, i love to say “he did good!”  I always give him the credit.  The only people who know that i micromangaged this whole oredeal is close friends and family.

    Post # 63
    6 posts

    I sent him the pictures of the styles that I like. Then he picked it.. I wanted him to put some effort , spend time to get me best he can and surprise me. He did it great… I’m glad that it wasn’t a bad SURPRISE!!! lol

    Post # 64
    11517 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    View original reply
    SimpleeAmbur:  DH and I picked it together.  He didn’t want to pick himself.  He knew what I wanted but he wanted to make sure it was perfect.  There were rings we loved until it was on my hand and then we hated them.  We picked the setting together, discussed what specs I thought were important with the sales lady and left the store.  He went back later on his own and picked the center stone himself – we both love that he was able to do that.  He decided to upgrade on the specs that I wanted as well and got me a better diamond that I hoped for.

    Wouldn’t change a thing 🙂

    Post # 65
    389 posts
    Helper bee

    View original reply
    SimpleeAmbur:  No regrets at all. Fiance picked my first e-ring himself and it wasn’t right for me for a myriad of reasons. My current e-ring is a dream come true. We designed it ourselves and went through the whole custom process. He says the design was 60% me, 40% him. I feel like I got everything I wanted with the exception of the fact that he chose 1.2 ct and I would have preferred 1.0 or even .80 just because I really find smaller stones more delicate and feminine. Still, I totally love it and am completely happy with the way we handled it.

    There’s no right or wrong with this process. If it works for the couple, it’s the right decision.

    Post # 66
    1377 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    I did not have much at all input into mine, and I don’t regret it at all. All I really knew I wanted was a white metal band, with something less than a carat equivalent, and I didn’t want just a plain solitaire. Fiance picked out something I never would have dreamed of, and it’s so very perfect, and so very precious to me that he worked so hard to both pay for it and pick out exactly what I didn’t know I wanted. I think if I would have been asked to pick it out, I would have stressed way too much about it and ended up being the one freaking out instead of him, lol. I did pick out my wedding band myself, and he picked out his (with help…lol). 

    Post # 67
    2425 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    My fiance let me pick mine out because he said if he picked it out he would have to go back anyways because the sizing might be off. I really like the ring I picked out but I told him if he picked it out I would love it regardless because its the thought that counts. I was just so excited to be engaged that I didn’t realize until later that the ring was a little bit so we did go back later to get it resize. I love my ring. 

    Post # 68
    1519 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2015

    We looked at rings together and I gave him my top two or three choices. But I definitely had input. If I hadn’t said anything he would have picked out a solitaire, which I definitely didn’t want. Instead, I got the ring that I was dreaming about – a blue sapphire halo ring.

    I always wanted to help pick out my ring since I grew up with that idea. My mom told me that she was adament that she get to help pick out her engagement ring. She worked at a jewellery store at the time and knew what she liked and didn’t like. 

    Post # 69
    1 posts

    we actually just picked up the ring that I picked out myself on the Ritani website.  He gave me a budget to work with, I researched picked out a few diamonds and we had a meeting with a Ritani gemologist To discuss my picks.  I chose a diamond they put it in the setting I wanted and shipped it out to a local jeweler that Ritani was affiliated with.  When we saw the ring he asked if I liked it, I said Yes so he paid for it and is keeping it to “surprise” me when he asks formally.

    So to answer your question, no I don’t regret it.  It really a matter of preference and knowing yourself and the man you plan on marrying.  I know I am detail oriented and he is not.  I know he would have taken his buddies along to look for a ring and they would end up picking something that isnt’t my taste and probably steer him to the cheapest ring because it’s all the same to them.  I know that had he done this I would have been able to tell if the ring was quality or not and would not have been happy with it especially knowing that his buddies picked it out.   Having picked it out myself, we avoided this situation and I have a ring that I love while he didnt have to suffer through the stress of picking one out (he doesn’t handle stress well. Lol)

     Ultimately, my POV is that I am marrying the man and it’s not contigent on the ring or some grand romantic proposal.  I know him and love him for who he is.  He’s not great at planning, I know him like the back of my hand, I even have a hunch of when he’s planning his “surprise” proposal.  That’s how he is so how can I expect or be disappointed when I know this about him already?   Some guys are into planning and grand romantic gestures and others are not as good at it but are earnest in their attempt to make you happy.  So I guess what I’m trying to say is you have to decide which category your guy falls in and base your expectations on that.

    Post # 70
    2347 posts
    Buzzing bee

    He picked it out, and I’m really glad he did. He asked about what style I liked and everything, but we never went to stores together. I showed him maybe 3 or 4 examples of things I liked online. He did such a good job, he way surpassed my expectations but at the same time chose a ring that is absolutely what i would have chosen for myself. I just love looking down at it and knowing he saw it and chose it for me. It was so speial how he told me about all the places he went, how he chose it, etc. I feel like he was really proud. I wouldn’t have wanted to select it, I wanted that whole experience. 

    • This reply was modified 6 years, 1 month ago by  swonderful.
    Post # 71
    863 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    View original reply
    SimpleeAmbur:  He asked what I wanted, so I told him. I don’t regret it at all! I have the ring of my dreams and a man that cared enough to find out what I loved, and provided it for me. I would read him posts from the Bee and he said men have no idea so many women are “learning to love it”. He thinks that is dishonest and sad. He saw no point in spending so much money on something he liked and I secretly didn’t. 

    Post # 72
    175 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014 - Brussels, Belgium

    I picked the setting, he picked the diamond, and I still love it 6 months later. I did realize after the fact that my setting really isn’t practical or go with most wedding bands, but I’m still happy. Actually I’m glad I picked it because who knows what Fiance would have gone with.

    Post # 73
    706 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    We had the ring made.  He actually is the one who found the idea online, but he okay it with me before he had it made.  It wasn’t the initial style I wanted, but he had an heirloom diamond that we were working with. Overall, I love my ring, but I didn’t believe in a traditional he picks the ring/proposes deal.

    Post # 74
    15 posts

    As for myself, i don’t even have a chance to pick the e-ring, and he purposed me with the swaroski crystal ring. I did not regret it at all, as i know how his financial at that time, not even have a budget to buy a diamond e-ring, in fact he was using the money for flying to Sydney from Singapore just to purpose me, not even think to purpose by phone and buy the e-ring instead LOL. Because of that and his true love i’m so proud of him.

    This coming Sept 29th, 2014 will be our Wedding 2nd Anniversary, we are expecting a baby! and surprisingly last friday, after work he told me to have a walk with him for shopping a solitaire ring!!!! i did not expect it at all! He wanted to give me a solitaire ring for our wedding anniversary gift. He let me choose the diamond and custom made the ring band. He did not specify his budget but as his wife i do know that i have to choose under 1 ct diamond LOL.

    I’m so overly happy with the ring:)

    • This reply was modified 6 years, 1 month ago by  Creamy.peony.

    The topic ‘Ladies that chose your engagement ring. Do you regret it?’ is closed to new replies.

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