(Closed) Ladies with rings, do people ask this?

posted 4 years ago in Rings
  • poll: What kind of response do you get from your large ring?
    Positive responses : (85 votes)
    69 %
    Negative responses : (12 votes)
    10 %
    Neutral responses : (27 votes)
    22 %
  • Post # 91
    Member
    3114 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

    My ring isn’t huge but some people seem to think it’s big, I haven’t had many of these comments but my mother made a snide remark about it being “a lot of cubic zirconia” I didn’t even correct her, its a typical rude comment from her. 

    Post # 92
    Member
    179 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2016

    I’ve been asked how much it costs by several people, and also what my fiancé does for a living. My ring is not big by any means (1.2 ct).  It’s an emerald cut though so maybe it looks bigger than it is. Anyway, I never answer the cost question, but I do when they ask what he does. I would never in a million years let someone try it on, and think it’s pretty weird that people would even want to.

    Post # 93
    Member
    2454 posts
    Buzzing bee

    AubreyMarie:  honestly the only one I have ever gotten was 5 and that was from my best friend so I already knew it was coming and didn’t feel weird about it…

    Post # 94
    Member
    949 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    AubreyMarie:  I don’t remember being asked any of those questions.  It could be because I’m a women of a certain age (older)  I’ve received compliments, not that many but enough.  However, just last week, one of my uncles grabbed my wrist to show another uncle my wedding set. 🙂 He jokingly said something but I couldn’t hear him (it was in Church)  What other people think or say about my wedding set that was giving to me by my love of my life, don’t matter to me.  I wear my rings with pride & diginity.

    Post # 95
    Member
    3173 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    AubreyMarie:  I’ve gotten #2 #4 and #5  Since I have a gemstone that’s a 2.5 carat equivalent people don’t ask if it’s real they ask what’s the stone. My ring has changed a few people’s minds about gemstones as an engagement ring. I’ve gotte . #4 as a snide remark on the fact that I wanted a gemstone with color.Fiance is the CTO of a big company (he just got the promotion) we could afford a 2.5 diamond but I love me some color. #5 was my kid brother’s girlfriend. So I let her try it on it was adorable.

    Post # 96
    Member
    3292 posts
    Sugar bee

    MrsC_2Bee:  WHAT! People ask to try it on! What do you even say to that?

    Post # 97
    Member
    438 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2017 - Bahamas

    Ukulele4You:  i have had friends and strangers alike aak me. It seems to be a regional thing although I’m the odd man out here i guess. I find it incredibly rude but already l at least a dozen people have asked since I’ve been engaged. 

    Post # 98
    Member
    1276 posts
    Bumble bee

    AubreyMarie:  

    1. A couple of times, someone has asked if one of my rings was real diamond. They were younger people so it didn’t feel that rude.
    2. No one has asked carat weight/size.
    3. I’ve only had moissanite stud earrings so far so N/A
    4. No one has asked about my FI-now-DH’s work.
    5. No try-on requests yet. This one made me laugh because I was so bad about that as a girl! I’d always ask my relatives and my mom’s friends if i could try on their rings. I stopped at about 9 yrs old. lolz Sometimes the rings were too tight to remove. (or that’s what they told me) hahah

    I usually just get occasional looks and compliments. When I had my 1st red garnet e-ring, I got some lousy ‘that doesn’t count’ sort of comments and reactions. That really hurt at the time… I still love garnets.

    Post # 99
    Member
    603 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    AubreyMarie:  oooooh yes. I’ve been asked what Darling Husband does, how many carats, if they can try it on (although only by a few friends), how did Darling Husband pay for it (!!!!!!!!!!!!). I’ve also been told ‘It’s got to be fake. There’s no way that thing is real.’

    I have no idea why people think these comments are ok! To be fair, I also get compliments on my e-ring and wedding bands all the time. The worst (I think a PP has also gotten this one), is “Wow your Darling Husband must really love you!”. Umm what? What does my ring have to do with his love for me? If anything, he jokes he wanted a flashing beacon on my finger to let all the guys know that I’m taken!

    Post # 100
    Member
    603 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Oh – have also gotten the ‘how much did that cost’ question. Those same people also asked us how much our wedding budget was…. *shakes head*

    Post # 101
    Member
    120 posts
    Blushing bee

    I’ve had my ring for only a week, but I’ve been in various settings: work, family, friends, bars, shopping, grocery stores, etc. and I have not had one person ask my any of these questions. Not family or my best friends. One of my FH’s friends who was the most recent to propose in our group did ask FH about all the specs. He spent a lot of money on her ring and I think he just wanted to compare. But hers was oval, halo, pave band, a lot more details (idk her TCW because I don’t ask about people’s rings) compared to my 1.19 Round Brilliant solitaire on a tapered cathedral yellow gold band. But he was the only one that inquired. everyone else has just said it’s simple yet so beautiful and I appreciate it and thank them and talk about how well my man knows me. ❤️

    Post # 102
    Member
    570 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2016 - Temecula, California

    Yes, I do get these questions. I have a beautiful 2ct oval diamond in a three sided micro-pave halo setting. F color/VS2 clarity. Glitters like crazy. Looks giant on my 4.75 finger lol.

    Question #1: Is it real? “Yes.” This is the only question I really answer because I find it so irritating.

    Question #2: Wow it’s stunning! How big is it? I respond with, “I know isn’t it amazing! I am in love with it.”

    Question #5: Can I try it on? “No.” or, “I don’t take it off, sorry.”

    Another question I get is, “Did you pick it out?”  I respond with, “Yes, my fiance and I decided that it would be best to pick it out together since I will be wearing it for the rest of my life!”

    I also get the “How much was it?” question.  I respond with a smile and, “We got an amazing deal!”

    I believe that it is best to stay positive and proud of your ring no matter what…. but especially if you are getting rude comments. Those are people that are either jealous or unhappy and are trying to make you feel bad or self-conscious. Don’t forget misery loves company! For example, if you get a comment such as, “Uh it is so big it looks fake.” I would respond with, “I know it is so beautiful it is hard to believe that it is real! I am one lucky girl!” Try not to show that you are irritated by the question. That will only satisfy their need to win or hurt your feelings. I always turn negative comments or jabs into overwhelming compliments.

    I generally get a positive response, however there are times where I get negative comments such as, “Wow, now you will be poor.” … or something to that extent. I ignore the jab and turn it into a big compliment…..which irritates the person trying to make you feel bad. This works amazingly well lol #YouLoose #GreenIsNotYourColor

     

    Don’t forget that it doesn’t matter how anyone else feels about your ring but you!

     

    Hope this helps!

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by  wifeyprice.
    Post # 103
    Member
    962 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2016 - San Clemente Church, Italy

    Yes, some may consider a big ring “vulgar”, but I know what the ring really symbolizes and the struggles and hardships we’ve had to get to this point in our lives. I was most disappointed by people close to me who couldn’t just be happy for me  for finally having unconditional love at 47, but they had to focus on the ring instead.

    Post # 104
    Member
    139 posts
    Blushing bee

    lawandbeauty53:  they are just jealous of that insane ring you get to rock – my gosh it is stunning! Never seen the like! 🙂 and congrats for finding unconditional love!

    Post # 105
    Member
    155 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    I have a 1.25 ct moissy, and I live in NYC, so I don’t think it’s huge for the area, but people comment on how big it is all the time (maybe due to the high setting). I’ve gotten “wow your Fiance must really love you” a lot and I’ve had two people ask me “So what kind of stone is it?” (The first time was a coworker who is very into jewlery, so I didn’t find it rude, but the second one was a girl I had literally just met). If people refer to it as a diamond I always correct them immidiately, but I think it’s kind of a tacky question to ask in general.

    The topic ‘Ladies with rings, do people ask this?’ is closed to new replies.

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