(Closed) Lamest excuse a guest gave you for not being able to come to the wedding?

posted 5 years ago in Guests
Post # 46
1246 posts
Bumble bee

My great uncle–his reason is that he’s never been east of Idaho before. Okay? I promise you don’t spontaneously turn into a pumpkin when you cross the Mississippi!

Post # 47
1183 posts
Bumble bee

‘We didn’t think you invited us’

– yes that was an actual response. After a save the date and in invitation. I also invited this friend to the hen do but the message was ‘read’ and never replied to. After giving this excuse it turned out they did get the invitation after all. 

Personsl feeling is that her good for nothing husband scrapped the save the date and then she couldn’t get time off work with later notice. He has made no attempt to get to know her friends, scrounges off my friend and spends his days sleeping andplaying computer games. He has history of not wanting her to do much other than with him (both invited to the wedding) on things he’s interested in. 

Post # 48
226 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

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Saus:  omg is that bad!?!  I didn’t attend 2 July weddings because they were on my daughters birthday (weekend) each year!  We weren’t sure when we RSVP’d what we would be doing either but we knew spending her birthday with her was more important to our family.  Of course I NEVER told the bride this, just RSVP’d no lol.

Post # 49
1565 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

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liaeona:  Ha! Is that some sort of excuse found in the “I Don’t Wanna Go So How Do I Get Out of It?” handbook? My friend’s step-dad won’t travel with his wife to visit her in Wyoming because he’s “never been west of the Mississippi before.” Is there some sort of special customs you have to go through to cross that imaginary border? It baffles me that they think that’s a legitimate excuse!

Then again, my step-mom has a fear of traveling to “The North” because she swears they look at her funny and it’s almost impossible to find sweet tea. I don’t even think the tea thing’s true anymore but I wouldn’t know becuase I hate the stuff so have never sought it out myself. I think she genuinely thinks there are lingering resentments after the Civil War so she’s not welcome as a Southerner. She’s not coming to my wedding both because of that and to avoid the awkwardness of being in the same room with my mom, which is at least an excuse I understand. Truth be told, it’ll make things a lot easier not having her there.

Post # 50
727 posts
Busy bee

I’m sending out invites at the end of the month so no official RSVPs yet but we’ve already had a few people express they probably can’t come. Which I’m totally fine with. But I’m already preparing myself for the “oh I might have this and this to do then I’ll let you know later” That is so rude to me. No one’s exempt from an RSVP date unless you have something major like a baby due that you just can’t plan

Post # 51
3606 posts
Sugar bee

This isn’t as ridiculous as some of the others on this thread, but one of my FI’s closest friends got a save the date and still managed to plan an international vacation that clashes with our wedding after receiving it. He feels horrible and is scrambling to change his travel arrangements around, but it’ll probably be too expensive for him to come in the end. If you don’t want to come, don’t come, but if it’s that important to you, just check the date before booking your trip. He could have emailed or texted my Fiance if he lost the save the date card.

Our other declines basically all involve people moving halfway across the world for cool career opportunities since we sent the save the dates and not being able to fly back for a couple days, which is a bummer but legitimate.

Post # 52
1594 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

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lantana:  Hubbys grandma (really the woman who raised him) didn’t want to come to our wedding because she didn’t want to “see the *new* Hawaii” and have it “tarnish her memories of old Hawaii”. 

Seriously. She only has two grandchildren and couldn’t just get over her worry about “tarnished memories” to attend ones wedding? Yeah, it’s different and changed quite a bit since 1950, but c’mon. I imagine your hometown has changed in the last 70 years too…

It was baffling. 

Post # 54
4035 posts
Honey bee

This may not be true for everyone, but I feel that once some couples have already had their wedding (which everyone attends), they sometimes don’t care as much about everyone elses. That happened in my family – we all flew to their wedding, and the couple (relatives), didn’t attend either of my daughters’. For the 2nd one, the groom managed to schedule something, that ended the day before the wedding, despite having a save the date 10 months before. I always leave STD magnets, on my fridge, until after the wedding; I’m guessing others might mark their calendars (or not?), and throw them away?

Post # 55
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

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Mrs.potatohead:  my cousin and aunt are threatening this (I have heard through the grapevine). My cousin basically doesn’t leave her kids with anyone but her mom (apparently she also won’t leave them for the weekend with her husband) and her mom is refusing to come, I don’t know, for spite? Hopefully that was just an initial emotional reaction upon hearing the news and they calm down and come to their senses. We’re a tiny family and they’re both hugely important to me so I want them there. 

Post # 56
969 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I do feel bad for those of you that had these responses, but they are making me laugh!  Oh gosh.  I actually left following up on RSVP’s to the people in my family that were closest to them, so I didn’t hear any excuses directly.  We also did not have a formal seating plan or specific number of plates…so honestly, there are a few people who didn’t show after rsvp’ing, but I didn’t notice.  And some people that never did RSVP.

I did have several people from out of town ask last minute (like two to three days before) if they could include family they were visiting in town!  

(including my husband about some siblings of another guest –since they were staying with them and he’d met them before).  For a split second each time, I’d stare at the person asking–like “we finalized the invite list almost a year ago, sent out invites more than two months ago, and you’re looking at me and asking (or Facebook messaging!) to ask if uninvited people can come?!”  And yeah–I totally told them all yes, of course.  Just guessing on the number of declines we had.  Probably not the approach that would work for many weddings but it worked out fine for us!  

There was a little shortage on food and drinks by the end, but apparently it won us over as the coolest bride and groom and best wedding many people had gone to.  Lol!  The memories and sharing it with people who want to actually be there is the best!  Even if I’d never met a few of them before that day 😀   

Post # 57
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

We had a friend RSVP but then no-show. Turns out, he thought it was on Sunday, but it was on Saturday. He remembered on Saturday after people were messaging about plans to get there, but then realized his suit was at the dry cleaners, which was already closed.

Post # 58
263 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016 - Ever After Banquet Hall

LOL! I love this thread! 

For my first wedding, an aunt said she couldn’t come because they had to buy a truck. I’m not sure where they were getting it on a Saturday night, but whatever LOL

For this wedding, a friend said he couldn’t come because another mutual friend was going to be out of town, and without that friend, he wouldn’t be able to afford the hotel room. What hotel room?!? You guys live like half an hour away LOL!

Post # 59
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

Teammate of FI’s gave us a head’s up (we didn’t do Save the Dates & hadn’t even mailed out the invites) not to bother inviting him and his girlfriend because she’s refusing to go to any weddings this season because he hasn’t put a ring on it. He says ‘even seeing an invite in the mail sets her off’ (they’ve been together less than a year, living together for about 4 months). Geez, I waited on a ring longer than her & I still sucked it up and managed to be happy for others & go to weddings, but whatever, stay home and sulk. 

Post # 60
2173 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m not mad at any of the people, but these were some of my favorites:

My childhood best friend, who lives an hour and a half away from me, couldn’t come to our wedding because “there was a golf tournament in town.” She doesn’t golf. She doesn’t watch golf.

My husband’s boss no-showed to our wedding and reception because he lost his invitation and couldn’t remember the time/place. When he saw us a few weeks later his response, “Not my fault — who has a morning wedding?” Right…


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