Post # 1
Here is my dillema,
We have 5 groomsmen and 5 bridesmaids. Almost all are couples or married and I feel its fair to sit them with their partners. I could just have 2 tables and sit the wedding party and their partners all at those two. Here is the problem. My brother is a groomsmen and his daugher is my bridesmaid. My brother would 100% have a better time sitting with my cousins he is close to as his wife isn’t attending our wedding. He would feel so uncomfortable sitting with the other random couples in our wedding party he doesn’t really know.
Can I sit my brother and my niece with their cousins and prioritize their happiness at the reception? Do I then also sit my fiance’s family who is in the wedding party with their other family? And group the friends in the wedding party who know each other from college together?
Basically I guess I am asking, can I pull apart the wedding party completely and group them according to who they would most enjoy sitting with and hanging out with? aka family, friends groups and not group them together just because they are all in the wedding?
Post # 2
mrsssb : can I pull apart the wedding party completely and group them according to who they would most enjoy sitting with and hanging out with?
Yes, absolutely. I wish more people would do this.
Post # 3
beethree : Good to hear! I feel like thats my priority in how I am seating people. Trying to seat people with those they want to spend time with and have the most fun with. I guess the only negative side effect im worried about from that is, would anyone take offense at not being seated according to ettiquite or higherarchy in the family or wedding party. But that might be a stupid thing to worry about?
Post # 4
We had a large wedding party – 7 Bridesmaids, 2 junior bridesmaids, 6 groomsmen 2 junior groomsmen. The juniors sat with their parents. Then we put the bridesmaids, groomsmen and their significant others at two tables based off who in the bridal party they get along with best. Our siblings that were in the bridal party sat with the bridal party because they wouldn’t fit at the tables with family.
So I recommend working on your seating chart and just seeing what works best.
Post # 5
Most of the people in our wedding party didn’t know each other and were attending with either spouses or children (or both) who were not in the party.
We didn’t seat the party together at all.
Sister + page boys (her sons), and Maid/Matron of Honor + husband + their two children were seated on one table together with a couple they both knew, and a few other couples with children of similar age.
Bridesman sat with all the people he knows from the social group we are both part of.
Junior Bridesmaid or Best Man (not a family member of mine) sat on my table with her parents. Because I wanted them there.
Groom’s two sons also sat on our table, but the Best Man sat with his partner on a different table with all their friends.
It was not a problem. I’m not aware of any offence, since we split up nearly everyone. We hate it when we go to weddings and are forced to ‘mingle’ with people we don’t know, so intentionally sat everyone on tables with as many of their friends/family as possible.
Post # 6
We separated our wedding party and sat them at different tables with their SO’s/other people they knew best. Only the best man sat at our head table (FIL was the best man and we just sat with our parents). I would absolutely prefer to sit with my SO and don’t care about being at the head table when I am in a wedding party.
Post # 7
I love your idea! We did the same. My husband had 2 gm, one was his brother who sat with his friends/family friends, and one was his long time friend that sat with other groom friends. It worked out great!
Post # 8
We did (for the most part) but they all were friends. One of my bridesmaids was my husbands niece and groomsman was my husbands brother so she sat with the “immediate family”. the rest of the bridal party and their partners (8 ppl) sat at 1 table. IMO, there’s nothing wrong with splitting them up to where they would be most comfortable
Post # 9
mrsssb : I didn’t read responses, but some of my bridesmaids were my FI’s sisters, some were my friends from college, and some were friends from high school – FI’s sisters sat with their cousins, college friends sat with college friends, HS friends sat with high school friends. ESPECIALLY if you’re not sitting with them there’s zero reason to force the bridal party (who’s connection is you) to sit together
Post # 10
We did the same– separated our bridal party based on who they would have the most fun with 🙂
Also, when I am a bridesmaid, this is what I hope for too!
Post # 11
Another vote for separating them.
Post # 12
Definitely! Put people next to their own friends and family.
Post # 13
Honestly I wish it was more normal. The last wedding I was in the party got seated togther with other members of the party, but not our partners. So my fiance had to sit at a table with some of the college friends of myself and the bride (we were roomates in school) that he kind of new from when we first met. I would way rather have sat at that table tbh!
Post # 14
mrsssb : There is tradition, but no rule that obligates you to seat the wedding party together. Traditionally, SOs and +1s of all guests, not just of the wedding party, aren’t seated together or even at the same table. That’s so that people might mingle. But few people follow that custom, either.
Post # 15
We had our wedding party at a head table but it really didn’t matter because everyone was everywhere all night. At the end of the day no one cares where anyone sits so you do you.