Post # 1
If you look at the date on my profile, you’ll see that I’m getting married in six days. SIX DAYS. Which is why it’s shocking that my guest list is still evolving. In the last week, my father decided to invite 3 more people, one of those people thought he could come and I had to call him several times to find out that he in fact cannot, and the other two I had to call to find out their menu choices. Also, last week, we found out that three people who we had assumed couldn’t come actually could, necessitating seating changes. Additionally, last night, literally one week out from the big day, I got an email from my cousin that he and his wife can’t come. Then tonight, my father called to ask if he could switch the two newcomers to the table my cousins vacated.
I understand that people’s lives don’t revolve around this, and my father has put forth so much money and effort into this wedding that I’m biting my tongue to avoid lashing out, but come on! I tried to be done with almost everything, and now I have to keep adding things to my list! It’s ridiculous!
Anyone else astounded by last-minute guest list changes? And wondering why people don’t understand what “rsvp” or “give me your guest list” means?
Post # 3
I think your situation speaks to the general poor etiquette that many people, even those we love, show during the wedding-planning process. It seems easy enough–receive the invitation, check your calendar, mail back rsvp, show up. But alas, such a simple process is horribly complicated when you throw real people in the middle of it. I’m sorry, I know it’s frustrating. 😛
Post # 4
My inlaws also added people last minute. My husband told them that was fine, but as we already did the seating chart and escort cards (which I spent a long time pinning to a cork board in alphabetical order), they would have to be the ones to figure out where to sit and how to tell them. They didn’t end up coming (due to health reasons).
Post # 5
To add to the difficulty of my seating chart, last night we found out two more people couldn’t come. One had a death in the family, so his fiance is going to the funeral with him. Obviously this is a horrible situation, and I feel so upset for them that I can’t be mad at all, (beside how self-absorbed would that be??) but I had to rearrange tables further last night, as well as email the coordinator for about the 20th time informing her our list has changed again.
As for the others – I just wish people really thought about it before returning an RSVP, and then that they were capable or prioritizing and making it happen. The notion of “something came up at work” is ridiculous to me when you’re in your 50’s and have planned a day off. But whatever, at least everyone who’s there really wants to be.
Post # 6
this situation is stressing me out. We need to give final numbers to our caterer on Tuesday and I’m not really sure how to say…10 people still can’t commit but they’ll decide last minute. what is WRONG with people!!
Post # 7
These details often work themselves out on the day of. People showup, people dont come. People don’t sit where they are assigned, people switch. I would just be thankful that they told you in advance, I would rather some tell me before so I have the possibility of recouping the catering cost than of them simpling no showing.
If someone can’t commit 10 days before I would let them know they are no longer invited. If you can’t be curious and RSVP and are still unsure about a life changing event then I really do want you there.
Another thing to consider is sending someone a bill for them no showing. 🙂 that would be toally rude and funny. .. maybe I will including that on my RSVP’s hahaa
Post # 8
I’m sorry you are going through this. I really hope I dont have to! I wish I could give you words of encouragement- but Ive not had to deal with it yet… Good luck! I hope you can at least take the day before your wedding mentally off- and just let go to enjoy the build up, take a deep breath and remember how excited you are to be getting married! Hope all goes well and CONGRATS!!! You’re getting married in 6 days!!! That is awesome!!!!
Post # 9
I’m having a semi-destination wedding, so at least people really need to know in advance if they’re coming, for hotel purposes and whatnot. Hopefully there won’t be any more changes to the list. I am relaxing, as tonight is officially the start of our wedding weekend. So hopefully everything else will go smoothly.
Thanks for the well wishes!