(Closed) Last name

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i already took it. it was difficult and i thought i was going to miss my own name a lot… i don’t deal with change very well. but i’m used to it now… i didn’t change and my brother had a baby boy, so my father’s name will survive.

Post # 4
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@tynakinnon:  we’re currently debating about it now…. and he’s upset that I don’t want to… 

Post # 5
Member
2654 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I currently have ExH’s last name, so yes I’m definitely going to take FI’s name! For folks who are on the fence, what about keeping your maiden name as your middle name?

Post # 6
Member
739 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m taking FIs last name. I don’t have any hesitations, I always knew I would take his name, I’m just a little sad about not having my maiden name anymore. Plus, I work for my family’s company with our last name at the company’s name. So I’m going to keep my maiden name only at work, and I’ve been toying with the idea of using my maiden name as a second middle name. 

Post # 7
Member
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

It’s a personal choice.  I’m not taking his name because of a few reasons including the fact that my degrees and my professional career are linked to my current last name. Yes of course I could change it, but why and for what benefit? Does it make me any less married because I will not be taking his name?  I think not. And further, call me lazy if you want, but changing it back I’ve heard is even more difficult.  Of course, in social situations I will respond to Mrs. XYZ, but I was a full person before him, and I will continue to be a full person once I’m married to him too.  And in case anyone’s curious, Mr. XYZ agrees the name change is an antiquated system.  

Post # 8
Member
4006 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m taking his name. I have always planned to take my future husband’s name, even back in high school when marriage was a distant dream. I have my dad’s last name – I havne’t talked to him since I was 3 and he’s kind of an asshole. I’m really looking forward to NOT having my current last name anymore.

Post # 9
Member
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I had a hard time with this as well. In the end I did it for two reasons… 1) My Darling Husband really wanted me to and 2) I knew it would be easier. I am used to my new name now and the whole name change thing doesn’t make me sad anymore. Honestly… I kind of feel like I have two names because I don’t feel like my old name belongs any less to me than it did before.

Post # 10
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee

OP, if you feel like you’ll lose your identity by dropping your maiden name, you should probably keep it. Unlike others, I won’t have a reason to get rid of my name (such as having the last name of an ex-husband or a deadbeat dad), and even though it’s hard for strangers to pronounce, I like it. It’s *me*. Besides, my DBF doesn’t like his surname too much (he dislikes how it gets mispronounced, even though mine gets butchered more, honestly).

It’s a personal choice, really. Do what you feel like doing. 🙂 

 

Post # 11
Member
713 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I actually feel like I’m getting an upgraded last name!! I’ve always planned on taking whatever my FH’s name is, so I’ve never really thought about NOT changing it. But I feel like I’ve won the name lottery with FI’s last name haha! I’ll be going from a generic white-person name to something that is way more cool and exotic. Plus, having the same last name as my future kids is really important to me, and unlike a lot of bees, I wont be getting my masters degree and professional designation until after I’ve changed my name. For me it’s a total no-brainer!

Post # 12
Member
512 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

Me and my Fiance are actually choosing a new last name. He doesnt speak to his dad, (his mums second husband) and his last name is his mums first husbands name. And I thought your family name should be yours, and it should stand for your family, were you are from and where you are going.

So we decided to make our own new last name to share as a married couple. You will need to check the laws in your country/state too.

I would have loved to take his name, but I didnt belive it was his, It was his Mums!

 

Post # 13
Member
1938 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@csperry2:  I kind of get what you are saying about having 2 names. I haven’t changed mine and we have been married almost a year… but I still probably won’t.

I never knew how ridiculously attached to my last name I am! I am an only child, though, too…

At best I will hyphenate if my Darling Husband desires it. 

Post # 14
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@tynakinnon:  it wasnt an option, traditionally i wanted to take my husbands name, personally i feel more of a little family unit and when the time comes and we have kids we’ll all have the same family name.

all my degrees are in my maiden name, i miss it and it feels strange when im with my family i dont really feel like a “miss maiden surname” anymore however while i do love my maiden name i also love my new name… it still is from the same nationality, its easier to spell, pronounce and i suit it 🙂

Post # 15
Member
9627 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

I am very traditional, and have always known I would change my name when I got married so I will be taking FI’s last name 🙂

Post # 16
Member
983 posts
Busy bee

I’m taking FI’s last name. I have xDH’s last name. Never requested my maiden name during the divorce because there were far more important issues going on, like kids, than requesting my maiden name.  I can’t wait to take FI’s last name! 

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