- 7 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
Those are all some really thoughtful responses, thank you.
Well…we got married! And we had the best day of our lives, THE BEST. But I will be honest, a lot of our friends still acted pretty lame about it.
My ‘best friend’ of 20 years – who I was maid of honour for, and spent a ton of money throwing her an out of this world shower and bachelorette a few years ago – was my bridesmaid, and left early (because of her 18 month old) from our rehearsal and wedding, didn’t say a speech, and didn’t even get us a wedding gift.
My FI’s brother didn’t come to our next day family celebration lunch just because he didn’t want to.
He’s also a millionare and he gave us a couple hundred bucks for our wedding gift. (I know that sounds so catty, but he throws money around like it’s nothing. He told my fiance to stop buying ‘cheap’ $400 watches and spend a good 2 grand on a nice one.) Uh…we are normal people with normal salaries. The point is he spends a couple hundred on a night of drinking. My Fiance thought his older and only brother would be a bit more generous. But, nope. Well, it’s his money to do what he wants with.
One of the groomsmen told my Fiance that people were ‘sick of hearing about our wedding.’ Really? And no one is sick of seeing the constant status posts of our friend’s new baby and every single thing her 6 year old says? Nope…because kids are ‘cute.’ And everyone is in kid mode right now. Talking about our wedding somehow came off as self-indulgent. Of course we listened though back when it was their turn……….so….not….fair.
And…ok I know this is a really stupid thing but it still bugs me…so we’ve put up some pictures of our wedding on facebook, and none of our friends have commented…but they have put up more posts of their kids and their own lives.
Do kids seriously change things THAT MUCH?! Suddenly you’re blind? I feel like I would still make the time and effort in my friend’s lives even if I had kids.
People told us – no one will care as much about your wedding as you do. And we found it’s true. But, I can honestly say that I did care about my friends wedding’s when it was their turn, and I did what I could and what they needed. What am I some kind of saint? No, just a person who cares about big deals. So why is it so selfish to want it in return? We just felt disappointed that people acted so nonchalant to us, to the point where we did start to feel like a nuisance because we had to chase down non-responders and deal with other people making it about their schedule and being disgruntled if our plans didn’t fit with them.
But as PP said, I think people at this age are on wedding burn-out. Sucks for those of us that are so excited to finally have waited so long for the right person to come along and have a meaningful wedding.
Anyway, they came, they saw, we all had a good time. But we got way more enthusiasm from our famillies. People are just going to do what they do. And it’s hard in this stage when kids do dominate. And people have branched off in life doing their own thing. It probably sounds like I’m being so petty – but it all affected our excitement. No one wants to feel like a nuisance about their happiest and biggest day. Excuse me for being a 30-something year old bride. Just the way it happened. Just my thoughts and observations.
Whatever. I can’t wait for my honeymoon and to start my life with my amazing husband!