(Closed) Late fall wedding, but waiting on official proposal

posted 4 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
3380 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Depending on where you live, a lot of venues and vendors could be booked a year (or more) in advance, as fall is a super popular wedding season. I’m not saying at all that you can’t plan your wedding in less than a year, but you will probably have to be pretty flexible on your date/venue/vendor choices. 

Congrats on your upcoming engagement! πŸ™‚ 

Post # 3
Member
13558 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I can never understand the logic of waiting for a so called surprise proposal that is anything but, or planning a wedding but not considering  yourselves engaged. Your logistical problems will go away if you call yourselves what you are. It doesn’t preclude being excited to get a ring.  

Post # 4
Member
318 posts
Helper bee

I have heard it is best to research venues and compare prices also book as quick as you can.   

Congrats on your engagement.

Post # 5
Member
3525 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

My BF probably won’t propose for another year-ish (unless he’s REALLY good at throwing me off, but I doubt it), but I’ve started a list of everything he says he wants for our wedding. By the time we actually do get engaged, I won’t have to plan a thing. 

If you know for certain that he’s proposing before the turn of the year, you might as well start booking things. Depending on where you live and how popular some of your choices are, a vendor may be willing to pencil you in and let you put the deposit down in a couple weeks (big “depends on your location”, though. I live in GA and it wouldn’t work in, say, Atlanta, but probably would in my little rural county).  

Post # 7
Member
763 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
beegirl1989 :  πŸ˜‚ your bf probably sees you as his wife since day 1! Well you might need to get his lad friends or your girl friends to sit him down n remind him he’d have to do the conventional “dating-proposal-wedding” route. I told my fiancé when we first started dating what I want if I ever get married, etc, so he’s been trained.

Some of my friends got married without a proposal, for practical reasons. Since it costs a lot to have two rings. More of the “I think we should get married – yeah, we should. – parents should meet up? – plan the meeting, plan wedding, get married”. Unless you’re in a church setting where you need to go through pre-marriage courses to book the church, but you need to be engaged to register for the course…

So don’t worry about the desires and plans you’ve already got. If he likes the venue and he wants to secure the location with a deposit, let him do it. It’ll probably help to start that conversation with a light mannered joke of “ummm… But you haven’t asked if I would marry you?”/”hmm.. the wedding plans all look great and all… but when did we get engaged? Did you propose but I wasn’t aware of it?” Just laugh it out with him πŸ˜„πŸ˜„

Post # 9
Member
763 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
beegirl1989 :  eventually he’ll get it. Maybe he’s waiting for the right moment. Be patient.. i know it’s really hard but it’ll be worth it! 😁 My fiancé told me he’d only ask me to marry him after I submit my thesis but he did it earlier when the weather was great. Lol. Now I’m trying to finish my thesis while trying to avoid thinking of the wedding prep. Hehe. Be patient, my dear bee sister!

Post # 11
Member
763 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
beegirl1989 :  did he want to do the proposal in spring/summer? oh well… it’s the heart that matters. hopefully he’ll get it n get on his knee soon! x

Post # 12
Member
91 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

We had our venue booked and half our wedding planned before the “official” proposal. I’d say if you find something you love book it!

Post # 13
Member
894 posts
Busy bee

why would you ‘wait on the proposal before booking anything’ as if you’re worried that he isn’t going to propose? That sounds really weird to me. For us we booked everything way before the proposal even happened. We were set on a specific date and we wanted to make sure our vendors are available. There is not much flexibility for us to wait around. And anyway I was 200% sure he wanted to marry me, the ‘surprise proposal’ is a cute touch that he wanted to make sure I get, but proposal or no proposal, the wedding is going forward. The whole idea of proposal is for him to ask and you to say yes. If you’re already planning for a wedding together with a clear timeframe in mind, technically you’re already engaged.
I can understand that you want the surprise proposal to happen before the wedding obviously, but why would you put the whole thing on hold for a ring and a question that you already know the answer.

Post # 14
Member
1506 posts
Bumble bee

Fiance and I went and looked at venues before the proposal. He proposed a week after we started. But for that week we just pretended to be engaged when talking to people at the venue. 

Post # 15
Member
7806 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I went to look at my venue in june 2016 and they had only 2 dates left for the entire 2017! They had a june date and a sept date, and we took the sept date. I would be surprised if you’ll have many “good” options if you wait until january to start booking for fall. 

Though, my friend snagged a really hot venue last minute due to a cancellation, so there are ocassional things like that. 

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