(Closed) LDR before & after marriage advice NEEDED

posted 10 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 17
Member
14181 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Your parents really need to just back off and be supportive. If they can’t do that, then don’t entertain the concept AT ALL with them.

We did LDR before we were married and after we were married, for about 6 months. I think i would have laughed if my parents suggested I move to Georgia, quit my job, and uproot my life temporarily. You gotta take care of numero uno–and that’s yourself right now. What’s 10 more months? To ensure stability for both of you? You gotta make sure you have healthcare and since you do, it sounds like a wise decision. You’d be foolish to just move without insurance, knowing you have your health at risk.

Post # 18
Member
3165 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

View original reply
@Miss Bumble: our situations are quite similar in some respects, I wish your parents were more like mine! I initially wanted to push our date til 2012 when we’d be closer to being done with our LDR, but both of our moms couldn’t wait that long so now we’re getting married next year. However, I disagree a lot with JrzyGurl’s suggestion that you should postpone or move down. I think that you do have a plan. Is it completely fleshed out? No, but at this point that’s just not an option (same with us). You have to wait to see what the next step is, simple as that. In the meantime, you’re getting married. You don’t need to uproot yourself and move right now in order to do so, and I really don’t think the 1st year would be harder in an LDR as opposed to living together. IMO, it’s the ‘living together as a married couple’ deal that makes the first year so hard for some people, so really we’re getting off lucky. Again, I’m so sorry that your parents just don’t get it, but please stay strong in your choice! Living with your parents and saving money is awesome (I’m doing that too – see, very similar!), so just try to put up with their nagging and stick to your guns. :]

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