(Closed) LDR: Stay engaged or get married? Sudden change in plans

posted 6 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
724 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I’m in a long-distance engagement right now. It’s hard, im not going to lie, but it is definitely doable. My grad school program was 22 months and 5 hours away from my fiance. I see him every couple of weeks and then when we have breaks from school. I think it would be harder to be in a LDM but there are two girls in my program that are doing it. I think if you both have the opportunity to do something that will better your careers and you future, then you should do it now before you really get settled into a routine with each other! Whether that means pushing back the wedding or going through with the wedding, I think thats only for you two to decide! 

Post # 4
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

We’re in a similar place. We’d been throwing around the plan to elope in May, but for financial reasons, it might end up with us doing a LDM rather than just the LD we’re in now. It’s tough to decide what’s best. Long distance is hard sometimes in the first place, but for me personally, I think the disappointment of not getting married might make it harder, if that makes sense.

It’s not the best situation to be in but you can definitely make the best of it, especially if you both are pursuing something you’re really interested in. Good luck!

Post # 6
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I feel you. We got engaged after 16 months of LDR (opposite coasts) and are marrying at nearly 3 years of long distance.  We’ll continue with a LDM for up to several years.  In your case, I think 20 months is doable but will take flexibility and very defined plans for maintaining contact, visiting, etc.  We’ve gotten more than a few raised eyebrows over the LDM thing, but to each their own.  It works for us.

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