Leaving kids in the car? Poll.

posted 3 years ago in Parenting
  • poll: Would you leave an 11 year old and baby in a car alone for a few minutes?

    No.

    Maybe, depends.

    Yes.

  • Post # 16
    Member
    934 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969 - City, State

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    abeeinlove :  So a dog dying in an overheated car isn’t as awful as a child dying in an overheated car?  The point is, you’re responsible for the eleven yr old and the baby the way you’re responsible for anything else breathing that you leave in a hot car…  just don’t do it.  

    Post # 18
    Member
    10559 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    I live in Texas, it’s way too hot for anyone to be sitting in a car that’s not got AC going even if the windows are down. As a matter of fact, I sat in my husbands car while he ran in to pay for gas today and it was super uncomfortable without the car running.

    That said, I think an 11 year old should be okay in a car that’s running with the AC on as long as the doors are locked. At 11 I would say in the car with it running frequently, I just locked the doors and unlocked them whenever my parent came back. 

    Post # 19
    Member
    1700 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    Hugs bee, the illegality Vs legality of leading kids in a car with the windows down varies by jurisdiction. I personally wouldn’t see anything wrong with it if it’s not too hot outside. I mean,  I love in Texas and Dh ran into home depot and I was feeling a bit tired,  so I stayed in the car with the a running.  If not for the school,  it works have been really hot,  even with the windows down. 

     If you do get investigated,  I’d explain exactly what happened,  and be upfront it and honest,  but definiteltly get a lawyer if they even attempt to take the investigation too far. I think it would be ridiculous for them to attempt a removal,  but I’m a foster parent and while I’ve never had a placement that was removed for such a ridiculous reason,  I’ve heard about some through the foster parent grapevine.

    Try not to stress or worry,  nothing will likely come of it,  but if it does and you answer their questions and they tried to recover I’ve the kids,  getting a good lawyer would be totally worth it.

    Post # 20
    Member
    428 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

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    leembee :  a dog has no thumbs and can’t open the door if it gets too hot or too much time goes by. An 11 year old is in middle school and can easily open the door, grab the baby, and run into the store to get mom if it’s too hot or she’s gone too long. That’s why the comparison doesn’t make any sense. No developmentally normal 11 year old has ever died from being allowed to wait in a car.

    Post # 21
    Member
    226 posts
    Helper bee

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    alley89 :  

    I’m sorry you’re going through this stress. I have 3 kiddos, 9,6, and 2.5.I have left all 3 of them in the car before, for under 3 minutes, when I could see them the entire time. At the ups store to drop off packages  (no receipt) and once at the vitamin Shoppe to buy something super fast (no line and could see them the entire time). Other than that I don’t trust other people or the world with my most precious people. An 11 year old is not shocking, but a baby, in warm weather, is shocking at first sight and even as a mother I feel like I would be alarmed. But you ran right out there. I’m hoping this person realizes this is not the situation they think it is. I hope she doesn’t report you.

    Post # 22
    Member
    226 posts
    Helper bee

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    macpartyoftwo :  no, not every parent thinks they will be just a minute but loses track of time. Been a parent for 9 damn years. Not once have my children ever slipped my mind or down my priority list because I was too busy to remember them or put their needs/care/ safety first. 

    Post # 23
    Member
    934 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969 - City, State

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    jackiebee :  And no 11yr old has ever been kidnapped before?  You’re also missing the point.  If you’re responsible for the wellbeing of a child, dog, anyone, then you think about the consequences of the situation you put them in.  I’m not trying to harp on the OP, just take the extra few seconds and bring them in with you next time.  

    Post # 24
    Member
    267 posts
    Helper bee

    Sorry OP, what you did was absolutely negligent. What does an 11 year old know about taking care of a baby, especially if overheating. Plus they’re at risk for being carjacked, kidnapped or god knows what because there are scary people in this world. You chose to have kids and as inconvenient as it may be sometimes you should either cart them into the store with you or have someone watching them at home. 

    Post # 26
    Member
    226 posts
    Helper bee

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    alley89 :  don’t beat yourself up.

    Post # 28
    Member
    1223 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 1995

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    sdxz554 :  At 12, I was babysitting for other families, so I think an 11 year old is perfectly capable of keeping an eye on a baby.  In 5 minutes, they are not going to overheat with the windows down.  

    Post # 29
    Member
    8021 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    It was a mistake, no harm came from it and you learned not to do it again. In my state a child has to be 13 to babysit another child- so I think I’d go by that (whatever the law for your state is). I have 3 kids- 14, 6 and 15months. I leave my 14 year old in the car, but not watching the other 2. Also, I seriously doubt anything would ever come of this even if the woman did try to report it.

    Post # 30
    Member
    428 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

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    sdxz554 :  you wrote two separate posts comparing this to leaving a dog in a hot car and talking about kidsdying from being left in a hot car. I pointed out that it wasn’t a fair comparison or a reasonable fear in this situation. You hadn’t mentioned anything about kidnapping or other consequences. 

    But if we’re talking kidnapping, your child can be kidnapped anywhere at any time. They can be kidnapped while walking next to you in the store, they can be kidnapped from their bed in the middle of the night, they can be abducted as an adult in a store parking lot or walking home from work. Maybe the OPs parents shouldn’t be letting her drive a car by herself, after all, tons of women in their 30s get abducted in this world.

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