Leaving kids in the car? Poll.

posted 3 years ago in Parenting
  • poll: Would you leave an 11 year old and baby in a car alone for a few minutes?
    No. : (118 votes)
    44 %
    Maybe, depends. : (88 votes)
    33 %
    Yes. : (60 votes)
    23 %
  • Post # 46
    Member
    1383 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2017 - Seattle, WA

    Just chiming it to add this is not illegal in every state. It’s not illegal in WA unless the motor is running. I have an 11 yr old stepdaughter and she’s allowed to stay home alone for up to an hour. She also watches her toddler aged brother from time to time for up to an hour. So yes, I’d feel safe leaving her in the car with a baby for very short periods of time. The heat is a separate issue, I’m not sure how hot it was where you are so I can’t speak to that. I may have made a different decision on a hot day.

    Post # 47
    Member
    1216 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    missviolet92 :  This is a terrible argument. 

    So you were 13 and admittedly unable to care for a baby–as you say, you prayed that the baby wouldn’t wake up. Why? If you were able to care for it, the baby waking up would’ve been fine. 

    But you’re using THIS POINT to justify an 11 year old caring for a baby being a-okay? That doesn’t make a lick of sense. If you couldn’t care for the kid when you were 13, why use that as an argument that an 11 year old is able to care for the kid? 

    Post # 48
    Member
    756 posts
    Busy bee

    Nope, I would not even leave them in the car within my view for 5 minutes. 

    Post # 49
    Member
    1216 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    pbubs :  Ahh, well, if it comes down to the definition of “unattended,” then I suppose leaving a 4 year old with the baby satisfies your requirements?

    Post # 50
    Member
    852 posts
    Busy bee

    It’s crazy to me that people think an 11 year old can’t watch a baby for 10 minutes. Like they’ve never played with their sibling alone in a room before? Come on. The separate issue is the heat. Leaving them alone with ac on and doors locked would have been better if it was hot outside. An 11 year old is more than capable of locking the door when her mom gets out and unlocking it for her to get back in 

    Post # 51
    Member
    4855 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    alley89 :  I think people need to calm their farm. This was pretty common practice when I was a kid. Mums would run in to buy some bread or run in to pay for petrol. You left an 11 year old with the baby for ten minutes at most. A normal 11 year old is old enough to monitor a situation with a little one for five minutes. I would however leave the windows up and put the AC on and get the 11 year old to lock the car from the inside. 

    I would have thanked the lady for concern and explain you’d just walked into the jewelry store to pick up a repair and that your 11 year old was more than capable of watching your baby and monitoring the situation. By running away in a panic you gave fuel to that ladies concern. You did nothing wrong.

    Post # 52
    Member
    486 posts
    Helper bee

    I do not have children yet, but at the age of 16, I never left my nephews alone. And I would never do that to my own children. I have two homes and one home is in the desert with triple digit heat summers. We’re actually expecting 105-107 this upcoming weekend. Scary, because I know we’re going to hear lots of sad stories of kids/animals being left in hot cars. Another sad one is unattended children near swimming pools ☹️

    Post # 53
    Member
    1216 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    cmsgirl :  Yet another logical fallacy. That it was EVER done doesn’t mean it’s reasonable or practical or good or etc. to do now. 

    Next: That it was done when YOU were a child means nothing–the world is always changing. When I was a kid, my mom smoked like a chimney in the house, and people smoked on airplanes! So because they had no clue back in the day that this was a problem, it’s no biggy to do it now? 

    Your argument is basically this: “It happened to me and everything turned out okay, so it’s okay for others to do it.”

    Do I even need to provide the BILLION examples that would illustrate how poor your logic is? Nope. 

    Post # 54
    Member
    1216 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    buzzerbeater :  Aaaaaand another fallacy. 

    Leaving an 11 year old alone in a room of your house with a baby is not comparable to leaving them alone in a car with the baby with the windows down.

    Shit things can happen in both situation, by the way.

    However, in the car situation–OTHERS have access to the children, far more so than if the children were alone in a room of the house with locked doors and windows. 

    People, seriously–argue for whatever you want, but kindly use a little logic. Better yet! Enroll in a Critical Thinking course at your local community college. 

    Post # 55
    Member
    2308 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2018

    View original reply
    DeniseSecunda :  no not at all. I can’t believe someone trusted me with their baby at such a young age for so long. Sure an 11 yr old is fine in the car with a baby for five minutes. Pretty sure our parents all did it when they had to pay for petrol. 

    Post # 56
    Member
    1297 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2021 - City, State

    Nope, absolutely not okay, I’ve been the woman who took pictures and called the police as well.

    i went to the shops and there was a car next to mine with a baby in it, it was snowing outside and freezing and the baby was in the car all wrapped up in their snowsuit. I waited a few minutes for the parent to appear, nothing.

    i called the police and they asked me to wait for them to get there, they took another 5 mins to come. They blocked the persons car in.

    i went into the shops and done a months shopping, all the while announcements where going over for this car owner to come back out. 

    I got to the till and walked out the shop back To my car as the owner appeared, she was away for over an hour. She got into huge trouble and was sat crying in her car the when I got to mine. I honestly hope she got hauled over the coals for leaving a baby in a car for at least an hour. 

    Post # 57
    Member
    1893 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2017 - Pearson Convention Centre

    I don’t have any children yet but I do have nieces and nephews I have never seen my sisters or sister in law’s leave their children in the car while they ran to a store. I also don’t remember my parents doing that with us

    Post # 58
    Member
    754 posts
    Busy bee

    I don’t think you did anything inherently wrong by leaving the 11 year old in the car with the baby whilst you did a short errand where you could see the car at all times.

    I do think that you made a misjudgment in this case though because of the heat. The heat meant that the windows had to be open and the car therefore not secure. 

    If the car was locked the whole time, I would say there wasn’t an issue. However, as it wasn’t, I don’t think you should do it again.

    I don’t think you should beat yourself up over it though. Just learn from it and move on.

     

    ETA- this doesn’t mean I think it would be ok to leave them in the car with the windows up in the heat, I mean that leaving the kids in the locked car would be ok only so long as the temperature allows. (For a 5 minute, in sight at all times errand)

    Post # 59
    Member
    4327 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I can’t believe the people saying this woman overreacted. She doesn’t know you, and i sure as hell don’t want some innocent child to be hurt when i could have stopped it. I would have called too, and I wouldn’t have felt bad for a second. If leaving the baby with a sibling does somehow make it ok, let the authorities decide that.

    I’d much rather live in a world where people step up to try and protect kids (whether misguided or not).

    Post # 60
    Member
    852 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    DeniseSecunda :  actually I’m in the process of getting my masters degree so no need for community college classes. You can stop indirectly calling people dumb just because they have a different opinion than you.

    If you’ll read carefully before ranting at me I said she should have left the windows rolled up, doors locked, and ac. Could something still happen? Of course something can ALWAYS happen anywhere. If we’re going to play the what if game we’ll be here forever. Bottom line is I think it’s perfectly reasonable that an 11 year can sit in a locked, air conditioned car with a baby for 10 minutes.

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