Leaving kids in the car? Poll.

posted 3 years ago in Parenting
  • poll: Would you leave an 11 year old and baby in a car alone for a few minutes?
    No. : (118 votes)
    44 %
    Maybe, depends. : (88 votes)
    33 %
    Yes. : (60 votes)
    23 %
  • Post # 91
    Member
    1660 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    View original reply
    alley89 :  Ah this doesn’t seem so bad. Then I was 10/11, my sister was 13, my Mum left us in the car on a hot 35C day. Windows rolled up. The car was red, so it heated up fast. We were in there around 45 mins

    But you’d think that as pre-teens we could just let ourselves out? Lol no

    Out of habit she deadlocked the car (pressed lock twice), which means you couldn’t open the car from the inside/outside, whatever, until you unlocked it again. The boot was also deadlocked so we couldn’t open it from the inside and crawl out. We were literally prisoners in that car, 60C+, for 45 mins

    My Mum died a little on the inside that day. She felt so guilty!

    So yeah, don’t feel bad. We’ve all done or been through worse.

    Post # 92
    Member
    633 posts
    Busy bee

     

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    chocolateplease :  I’m an attorney too, and I seriously doubt leaving an 11 year old in a car to watch a young sibling for a few minutes would even remotely qualify as general ‘parental neglect’ in any state in the US. It certainly wouldn’t qualify in my state. That’s absolutely laughable absent extraordinary additional circumstances.

    Post # 93
    Member
    1608 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    Sephiroth :  like I said, I haven’t researched this general topic, so before saying something is or isn’t the case point blank, I think it is wiser and fairer to say it’s a possibility lest the OP take any advice seriously. Dont get hung up on a single word in my whole post. I gave it as an example as a general topic or area that maybe, possibly some judge somewhere could squeak out a place to hang their hat on for such a situation. 

    Do tell me that you are an expert or actually knowledgeable about this subject and we can have a different conversation. But that’s not what you are saying….so yeah. Point still stands.

    Post # 94
    Member
    633 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    chocolateplease :  You didn’t say “it’s a possibility”. You said “… I’d bet there’s a general parental neglect/parental supervision statue in any given state that this very situation would fall under.” Worse, you threw in your ‘attorney cred’ to back up the (baseless) idea.

    It is an utterly ridiculous thing to say for anyone who has the basic comprehension of their state’s statutes required to pass the bar. So, yeah. Point still stands.

    Post # 95
    Member
    486 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2016

    My sister in law leaves her youngest with her older three kids all the time! I think the oldest was 12 when she started doing this. Like for a quick run to the grocery. She’s a great mom and they seem to have it under control. A lot of moms I know leave kids in the car while picking up a coffee (within sight). I’ve been an infant nanny of 8 years and I’ve seen it all! 😉 I always bring the baby with me, but duh, that’s literally my one job. I would be less cautious with my own children than the ones I nanny!

     

    If I’d been in this situation, I would have just waited to see how long the children were alone! And definitely not have been concerned if under 5 minutes.

    Post # 96
    Member
    22 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: November 2018

    Well you ran the risk of your child overheating in a hot car

    Post # 97
    Member
    1345 posts
    Bumble bee

    I voted no but I live somewhere really hot so it’s drilled into everyone to never ever do it xo

    Post # 98
    Member
    710 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2000

    I have 3 boys my eldest is 11 and my youngest is 4 and I know I will get hate for this but if it is just to pay for gas or

    something  quick like that people need to just mind their own we live in a society that is too concerned about what everyone else is doing and unfortunately people cause more drama than needed now if it is a new born and a 5 year old take them in obviously 🙄 but this situation is soooo crazy your 11 year old and younger child were fine I cannot stand people like this taking a picture of your license plate oh I forgot we are supposed to be perfect when i

    was younger my mom used to have to work so I at 12 had to

    watch

    my 5 year old brother for 3 hours after school !

    Post # 99
    Member
    2308 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2018

    It’s a stormy winter’s day here today and someone just stole a car with a four year old in it. Enough said. They’re thankfully ok.

    Post # 100
    Member
    2188 posts
    Buzzing bee

    In Florida the law allows one to leave child in the car for very brief period of time (I forgot the time limit). So even IF DCF was called, case would be closed if we are talking about running to a gas station. We have a car with remote start (keys are in my pocket). I can lock the car, and have AC running remotely. Kids are cool, no one can break in as doors are locked. If I need to drop off fed ex package or something, I don’t see that being an issue. 

    Again, since it’s not illegal in our state- it becomes one of those different parenting decisions that parents decide for themselves. There is much more risk in getting in a car accident with child in the car than abduction happening (which statistically is very rare). People still drive sleep deprived with a newborn in the car. It’s up to a parent to decide what risks they are ok/not ok with. 

    Post # 101
    Member
    1573 posts
    Bumble bee

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    meliamartinez31 :  At 11, I was babysitting a five year old, a three year old, and a one year old.  At night, all by myself.  They trusted me just fine.  The kids were fine and I was fine.  I’ve actually got two of them on Facebook now – it’s great to see how they turned out.

    Post # 102
    Member
    2006 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2017

    Not going to go into OP because she already learned her lesson but its  a definite no for me. I don’t understand how all these bees find it okay. 5 minutes is actually a long time. It only takes 90 seconds to abduct a child. It takes 6 minutes for your brain to start dying after being deprived of oxygen.  While these two things might seem irrelevant,  the point is, 5 minutes IS a long time in comparison to life changing things that could happen in that time. And also, it’s funny to me how many times children have been referenced to as “inconvenient” for adult errands but yet parents hate advice from non-parent people. I have had my niece with me as a newborn, toddler, and now kid age 6, and have never left her in the car. Period.  Working in law enforcement doesn’t help my heightened sense of “anything can happen” but my common sense has never allowed me to think it’s okay for even 5 minutes.  And I don’t have the mentality that they are an inconvenience. If I’m not a parent and carting my niece around for errands isn’t an issue for me, I don’t see why it is for parents who CHOSE to have their “inconveniences,” cranky baby or not. 

    Post # 103
    Member
    273 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2018

    Only you know your kids, Bee. I am not a mom, but I would have no problem leaving my little sister in the car with one of my nieces for a couple minutes when she was 11 because she’s more responsible than most adults I know. She would know exactly how to respond. At that age she was babysitting, always with an adult around, but in this scenario, she would have known where and how to find said adult. CPS may be called, but, honestly, this will be a no harm no foul situation. They will probably have a chat with you about the risks, but they aren’t going to take your kids away on this incident alone. This woman likely didn’t follow up on it, anyway. 

    Post # 104
    Member
    9538 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    i always ask myself this.  would i run in somewhere, where i know it is going to be super quick and not take the kids out.

    turns out my husband has picked up his dry cleaning with both kids in the car.  he leaves the car running with a/c or heat on, which ever time of year, and he can see them at all times.

    both our kids are still in carseats and cannot get themselves out.

     

    ETA: both my husband’s and my car.  we can leave the car running, lock the door, and be able to take our keys with us.  if some how someone got in the car, it would stop working a certain distance away from the fob. 

     

    Post # 105
    Member
    2188 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    ajillity81 :  We have same car features. Yay for technology advancements. 

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