Post # 1
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee
Hi Bees,
So after doing tons of research I am more on the fence than ever about this.
If you do a legal ceremony in Mexico, it takes 3-6 months to get your certificate sent to you, so in other words, you are not legally married for that long after your wedding and cannot begin proceedings to change your name or anything.
These facts have made me look into having a JOP wedding a couple of days before we leave and doing the symbolic ceremony to avoid the delay.
Have any of you done one or the other? If you did the former, were you really not legally married in your country for that long after? (Im in Canada)
If you did the latter, what are your opinions on that?
Thanks In Advance Bees!
Post # 3
Member
1664 posts
Bumble bee
I know someone who had a JOP ceremony almost a year before their Destination Wedding. I would do it a week or so before. I don’t see anything wrong with it, and it avoids the hassle.
Alternatively, are you dead set on Mexico? There might be other countries that will be easier to deal with.
Post # 4
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee
@EleanorRigby:
Oh I would totally want to do it closer to the date.
And yes, I kind of am. The reason being is that I’ve been to this resort before and I know it is perfect. Plus they have a gorgeous gazebo that is all white and ocean side. Also what I envisioned/need for my wedding.
Other than that, I wouldn’t care. Its just the comfort of knowing where I will be going, food quality, etc.
Post # 5
Member
3182 posts
Sugar bee
I’m not sure how helpful this will be but I know my friend got married and Mexico and recently got divorced. Apparently they were never even legally married in the US, so they never actually had to get an actual divorce. I obviously don’t know much about it, but would be tempted to go to the JOP just to make it easier on yourself.
Post # 6
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee
@Natalieh86:
Are you friggen serious???? a blessing in disguise for your poor friend I guess but that creeps me out to think I could live the rest of my life with my beautiful Fiance and find out at some point that we weren’t really married.
You just put another tick in the box for JOP ceremony prior to departure.
Post # 7
Member
3182 posts
Sugar bee
Yes but I think they knew they weren’t legally married, it didn’t come as a surprise later on. She didn’t change her name or anything here so I guess for them making it legal here wasn’t that important?
Post # 8
Bee
916 posts
Busy bee
- Wedding: December 2010 - Al Cielo / La Laguna
We got married here in the states by a JOP and it was perfect. We didn’t run into any of the issues like not being able to register our certificate with our local court house. We would be legally married but if for any reason we need get another copy or our kids wanted to ever look it up, there would be no record here in the states.
Not to mention we didn’t have to jump through any of the local legalities like having our ceremony a certain way. We were able to do our love story ceremony that we wanted.
I wrote about the decision to get legally married here a long time ago. Maybe it will help:
http://www.weddingbee.com/2010/09/14/wedding-in-mexico-legal/
Post # 9
Member
2388 posts
Buzzing bee
We’re having our Destination Wedding in Mexico at the end of the month and also did not want to go through all the legal loopholes down there. We just had our legal ceremony last Friday and will have a symbolic ceremony in Mexico. I think it was the right decision for us.
Post # 10
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee
@meerkat:
“Also, the only type of ceremony that is recognized as legal in Mexico is a civil ceremony (which has no room for customization)”
Thank you times ONE MILLION! I’ve been looking for confirmation of this. We most DEFINITELY want to write and say our own vows.
Sold.
SuperKate:
Thanks for the post. One more ‘tick’ on the JOP side of the tally
Post # 11
Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
My BIL got married a few days before their destination wedding in Mexico. I would do the same if I were you.
Post # 12
Member
33 posts
Newbee
I am getting married in Cuba in August, and I too wanted to have a “real” wedding on the actual wedding day…but….as you say, there is a lot to that – the translation of your documents and then all the wait after the fact.
we decided to do this:
we have told nobody but our two whitnesses (who we chose for our maid of honor and best man). Everyone thinks that the wedding in Cuba will be real and it will be set up to be as real as real gets without the actual certificate. We will however be legally married at the end of this month with just our two whitnesses in attendance and then we are going for a nice dinner afterwards. its a secret between the four of us. Everyone else will think they are attending the real thing in Cuba in August (and that is actually what we plan to celebrate as our anniversary).
I was dead against it and now I’m totally cool with it. It just saves a lot of hassle.
Post # 13
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee
@mmcmahon:
Ya I guess that is a whole other thing some brides are worried about. I am not too worried about it seeming like less of a marriage.
If anything, because we are going to get to say our own vows, it seems more real.
Post # 14
Member
5886 posts
Bee Keeper
We had a wedding ceremony and marriage ceremony like you are thinking, but backwards. We had our wedding in VA (had a difficult time getting our officiant legal) so we had our marriage ceremony in Vegas with Elvis on our honeymoon. Totally loved it and you get twice as many photos.
Post # 15
Member
47 posts
Newbee
I am having this same issue- I am getting married in Mexico and we have been set on a legal ceremony in Mexico but now we’re leaning toward doing a JOP the day before we leave or something. The problem is that my parents keep telling me if is a “fake” wedding in Mexico if we do that. (How rude!!)
We are so torn and have no idea what to do, we have been agonizing like crazy over this too.
