Legally married a year before the wedding?

posted 3 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 76
Member
1412 posts
Bumble bee

jannigirl :  Ok, but in general this is NOT ok. And priests turn down convalidation requests all the time (I’ve got a few priests in the family) because ‘I wanted an outdoor ceremony’ is in fact not a good enough reason. 

Post # 77
Member
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

lilsweetie :  No, we don’t want to live in the US after, at least for now. We are happy where we are in South America, and Fiance has a fledgling business that is doing really well here! But that becomes our problem as they assume he wants to live there… We don’t want to close that door for the future, though, either. So it puts us in a real pickle. If we say we’re coming to get married, it’s highly likely he won’t be allowed in. If we don’t and then our marriage certificate says we did, it’s likely to cause problems with green card application in the future… So here we are, doing the last thing I wanted to do! 🙁

Post # 78
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

emsc123 :  No problem!  I hope you find out what’s best for you two while still feeling like you are honouring your family and close friends.  A lot of people at my work for example, didn’t even know I got married or was pregnant for a long time.  It wasn’t a “secret”, it was just why would I announce to people I don’t talk to all the time, it comes out naturally when it does.

 

Post # 79
Member
398 posts
Helper bee

This will definitely take away from the day. I wouldn’t want the two to be separate.

Also, if your families are paying for the wedding why don’t you talk to them about moving up the time line?

Post # 80
Member
1309 posts
Bumble bee

This is dumb. Your Fiance doesn’t have a job and you are going to get married in secret to spend money for a party celebrating something you did a year ago? And you have a kid? WTF?

Post # 81
Member
14 posts
Newbee

I’m sorry you’re getting so many rude responses. You do what’s best for your and your family. But don’t lie about it. I think your family and friends will understand. I had a friend do this for other reasons but she also started celebrating 2 “wedding” anniversaries which I thought was the lame part. Gifts or no gifts I think your loved ones will just be happy to celebrate your union.  

Post # 82
Member
80 posts
Worker bee

Nah I did it. Then again my “fiance” and I are paying for everything with our own money and we honestly do not care for anybody’s judgement or negativity.

Post # 83
Member
482 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Can you add him as a domestic partner to get him insurance? My husbands company let him do that so I could be on his before marriage. I wouldn’t want the days to be separate and if it’s been a whole year,  it probably will be less special because uhhh you’ve been married a year already. If you do do it, I wouldn’t act like the one in a year is a wedding. You need to be honest about it. People get more pissed when they’re lied to.

Post # 84
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee

I get it, I just don’t get the need for deception. My friend did that for visa reasons and she told people and they married six months later. Pretty sure nobody cared xo

Post # 85
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee

jellybellynelly :  same here, in Australia you also most certainly cannot get married in a church if you are already married. I think non-religious ceremonies can be done, but of course without the legal aspect to them, it’s basically just a cutesy little ceremony imo which of course anyone is free to do at any time they choose xo

Leave a comment


Find Amazing Vendors