(Closed) Legally Married with Kids Planning a Wedding

posted 8 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

it can be a vow renewal rather than a wedding, or even an anniversary celebration… and u can still have everything a regular wedding has.. 

Post # 4
Member
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

We got legally married in 2009 but had a big wedding in 2010.  Who cares what people think (no one said a word to us about what we chose to call it).  Have your day, wear a pretty dress and say your vows.  If you want the big wedding, have one! 

Post # 7
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Mom2009: oh i didnt know you could get legally married and not say any vows.. the act of getting legally married itself is a vow to the other person

Post # 8
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Ladyox has the right idea!  Just go for it – call it whatever you want – wedding, celebration of your marriage, whatever!  The really nice thing about already having the legal stuff out of the way is that you can be really creative with your ceremony (especially if you aren’t going the religious route). 

Have fun with it, and congratulations!

ETA: as for not feeling like a bride, and not having the excitement of a wedding – are you feeling like that because you’re afraid of what others will think about it?   If it is because you’re worried about others reactions to your having spread out your legal marriage and the wedding celebration, remember that plenty of others have done the same for a variety of reasons – enlistment, deployment, similar immigration issues. 

Sorry if this is convoluted and not very helpful – I’m having a hard time thinking and writing clearly tonight!  Bottom Line:  Do whatever makes you happy, and don’t worry what others might think about it!

Post # 9
Member
102 posts
Blushing bee

You signed paperwork to make sure the father of your child/children could stay with you. You didn’t get married. To me getting married is the spiritual aspect of making life long promises to support one another. Weather or not that’s your definition, you haven’t defined your marriage yet in your own way. Don’t worry other people are a lot less judgmental and more understanding than we expect them to be. Plan your wedding as you see fit and invite those you love, they’ll understand.

Good luck!

Post # 10
Member
1331 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

I can totally understand what you mean about feeling like your bridal/wedding opportunity has passed you by.  While I’ve never been legally married, I have children and feel like I’m a common-law wife anyway, lol.  But we do deserve all the bells and whistles that other brides get!!!  You can have whatever you want:  a big church ceremony, a huge poofy ballgown, anything and everything!  And once you actually start planning, I’m sure the excitement will build and you’re gonna be super-duper ecstatic!  Just jump right in, girl, good luck!

Post # 11
Member
1331 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

I can totally understand what you mean about feeling like your bridal/wedding opportunity has passed you by.  While I’ve never been legally married, I have children and feel like I’m a common-law wife anyway, lol.  But we do deserve all the bells and whistles that other brides get!!!  You can have whatever you want:  a big church ceremony, a huge poofy ballgown, anything and everything!  And once you actually start planning, I’m sure the excitement will build and you’re gonna be super-duper ecstatic!  Just jump right in, girl, good luck!

Post # 12
Member
1331 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

Eeeek!  My first double post ever, that sucks.  Wish we had an option of deleting it.  Sorry!

Post # 13
Member
7052 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Definitely have a vow renewal!  One wonderful way to recite your vows to each other again and have the wedding you’ve been dreaming of!

 

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