Post # 1
This is totally random, and I am just curious: have you ever lent someone money? If so, did you get it back?
Money can cause so many problems in relationships that I am just curious if you have ever done it (with or without Fiance in your life).
Post # 3
If I were to make the decision to give someone money it would be a gift not a loan. I’ve heard too many stories about people not getting their money back. So if a friend or family member was really really in need and I could afford it, I would gift them the money. If they happened to pay it back that would just be a bonus.
Post # 4
I have learned that banks lend money, family/friends shouldn’t. Giving money to a friend or family member with the intention of getting it back is generally going to cause some issues. Both Fiance and I have given friends money, with the intention of it not being returned (if they happened to, that would be great).
We upgraded our home theater system and were going to sell our old one on Craigslist. A friend expressed interest, so we sold it to him for a fraction of what we were planning on selling it for. Fiance went over and set it up for him, and when we were getting ready to leave, his friend “couldn’t find his wallet”. We used to hang out with this couple on a regular basis, now they haven’t returned our calls in 3 months. We gave up on the idea of getting that money, but are disheartened by the fact that we were deceived and a friendship ended over it.
Never mix business with pleasure.
Post # 5
We never have, but my Fiance says that he would only loan money to someone if he didn’t want/need it back. I think that’s a good outlook because things can happen, and someone who really needs money likely won’t be able to pay it back. We may run into this with his mother someday, but hopefully not for a while!
Post # 6
I covered some of my roommate’s expenses in college. Over the course of a summer she owed me over $500 which is a lot when you’re a college student scraping by on part-time work. she then proceeded to take a trip to Italy and give money to homeless people in front of me. I got really annoyed to say the least. I eventually got about $400 back, but she also stole my portion of the deposit on the apartment, so she still owes me a couple hundred. The money along with some other things destroyed our friendship.
Post # 7
@BoxerLady: I’ve given family members money when they were in difficult circumstances and would do so again.
I’m not a big believer in lending money but I’m not saying I wouldn’t ever do it. I would under certain circmstances.
If the circumstances happen to be that you’re just irresponsible with money, live beyond your means and never save? Yeah, sorry, can’t help you.
I don’t work and deny myself things so I can save just so I can hand it over to someone else who doesn’t do those things.
Post # 8
I’ve loaned money many time. I loan it with no intentions on getting it back. So I only loan what I can afford to lose. I have always got it back, sometimes quickly, other times in forms of dinner, movie, etc.
Post # 9
Yes, to one good friend before. He eventually paid me back but it took a while and a payment plan. It was a bad idea to begin with since I knew he was really bad with money, but I trusted that he’d pay me back. It was just a little to begin with, then it added up, then there was a big loan for his car to just hold him over over pay day. Eventually it was almost 3k. All the while he was buying new electronics and going out to eat nice dinners, so it jsut got aggravating. We eventually settled on a 200/month payment plan which he stuck to, and I think paid off the loans.
Post # 10
I haven’t as I have no money to lend. I have borrowed money from my mom and am in the process of paying her back.
Fiance has loaned money to his brother, and his brother is paying him back.
Post # 11
I only did it once and my friend gave me a very short deadline by which she would pay it back (a week). She paid it back.
Post # 12
I don’t loan money to family/friends, I just give it. Sure, maybe they say it’s a loan but in my mind if I decide to help someone out financially, I don’t ever expect to get it back. If you loan with expectation to get it back, it will only cause issues in the relationship…
Post # 13
I chose other because I’ve lent SO some $ here and there and he always pays me back within a few days.
Post # 14
I have never lended money. I have given someone money though. I just don’t think it creates a healthy situation when a friend or family member “owes” another, so I’d rather just give it freely or not at all.
Post # 15
I usually give it, never expecting it to come back. That mainly applies to my immediate family (mom and dad).
Post # 16
@somerrae: That is horrible! You try to do someone a favour and they choose electronics over friendship? Give me a break. What jerks!
I think you ladies have the right idea. Don’t lend it if you can’t afford NOT to get it back. It seems people take advantage of friends and family in these situations. I have never borrowed money from anyone, but if I did I would pay it back ASAP. I would hate the feeling of owing someone something.