(Closed) Letting bridesmaids chose their own random dresses

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
345 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

I would at least pick a color. You can just tell them to find a grey dress, you don’t even have to specify the exact color grey…but at least they would be in the same color range. 

I found it more stressful to have no guidelines when picking out a bridesmaids dress. Then you wonder if you are picking something that will look good with everyone else/if the bride will hate it. I know you said you don’t care what they wear, and that’s awesome! That was just what was going through my mind when I had no guidelines when picking out a dress!

Post # 3
Member
8600 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

I would atleast pick a palette of color options or yes it will be a hot mess. People actually appreciate a little direction when it comes to these things.

Post # 4
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: Lombardi\'s On The Bay

This is (almost) exactly what I am doing. Personally, I don’t like the look of everyone wearing the same exact dress. It looks too uniform and sterile to me.

I’m going to ask that my 2 bridesmaids wear dresses that are about knee length and yellow. I don’t care what material they’re made of, what the neckline looks like, etc. I also could care less what kind of shoes they wear. 

My cousin who got married a few years ago had 6 bridesmaids, all of whom wore completely different dresses- different colors, lengths, sleeve lengths etc. Guesd what? Her wedding pictures looked absolutely awesome and the wedding went off without a hitch. I think the same will happen for you. ๐Ÿ™‚

If you’re really antsy about someone picking something totally “off”, maybe you could suggest a few different colors to choose from (ie: black and grey, neutrals, pinks) I have seen wedding pictures with this theme as well and they look stunning!

Post # 5
Member
1617 posts
Bumble bee

I have a small wedding with one maid of honor, one flower girl, and one best man. So this might not be much help. But I did let my maid of honor pick the dress she wanted. It flatters her figure perfectly. Not only that, but I let her pick it in her favorite color. Our wedding colors are coral, sage, cream, and grey. Her dress color is a dusty lilac (so there is a bit of grey in it). Honestly, the other colors do not look good on her for some reason. She is my best friend and I wanted her to be able to wear the dress again. She is carring a bouquet with my colors but to tie everything in, the florist is including silver lilac colored roses. My flower girl is wearing a dress that has a coral colored sash, though. ๐Ÿ™‚ Kids are a little easier to mold. 

Post # 6
Member
1720 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I think that if you stick to the color palette it’s a great idea and works fine. I did this for a wedding I was in last year and it was nice except the bride wanted a certain shade of mint and that proved a little hard to find (lots of dresses that are called mint are actually more like tiffany blue) but I don’t think you would have that issue with dark grey/navy or black (though I would probably narrow it down as you might end up with one of each color) 

For my wedding I picked a designed and a color and let the girls pick any dress they wanted in that range (about 140 options) and I thought that was a nice mix of what they wanted but still the exact shade I wanted 

Post # 7
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I saw some pictures on Facebook of a wedding where the BMs had obviously just been told to get a blue dress. While I’m not into the matchy matchy let’s all have the same shoes thing, I think you need more guidance. There were all different styles, shades, quality of material….it looked messy.

Post # 8
Member
1182 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I told them they could pick any pink dress the only stipulation was that I HAD to be there when they were buying it just so I could see the vision in my head. Here’s how they turned out:

 

Post # 9
Member
404 posts
Helper bee

I asked for colours nude / light pink / cream-ish, gave them £40 each (UK bride) and let them pick. Was really happy with the results! Seven bridesmaids is really too much to coordinate with tall, short, big boobs, small boobs, narrow hips, wide hips and one pregnant  – wasn’t going near that ๐Ÿ˜‰

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Post # 10
Member
2595 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2019

View original reply
crossroadsgirl:  I gave the girls one request aqua, tiffany blue, or a very light teal and to show me pics of their dress before they boguht it.

Post # 11
Member
6257 posts
Bee Keeper

My cousin did this for their wedding – even the bride didn’t wear a wedding dress, just a nice gray one.  The photos look lovely, but mostly don’t look much like a wedding to me – just a fancy dinner or something.  I’d say at least give them a color palette. and it should be good.  Since you have a gown/dress yourself, that will help.

Post # 12
Member
2168 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

View original reply
crossroadsgirl:  THis is what I did. I didn’t at all want to do the samey samey bridesmaid dresses either (or any of the stress to go along with it) – so I told my 4 girls to get or wear (if the already had something that fit the bill, cool) a plain black dress with black shoes. And my only request was that it not be strapless bc my dress was strapless and I wanted it to be the only one. That’s it.

They all got their own plain black dresses and it looks fantastic in the pictues. It looks like we are ‘coordinated’ but not robots. Everyone looks like themself. Plus they all had the same yellow parasol to tie them all together.

Go for it! I personally don’t understand the need for matching dresses.

Post # 13
Member
2168 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

To quote Stacey and Clinton: Things don’t have to ‘match’, they have to ‘go’… ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 14
Member
303 posts
Helper bee

I’m doing this too – I have 6 bridesmaids and my only requirements were navy and cocktail length.  Three chose to order different dresses but same fabric from a certain line (chiffon).  Another one got a Bridesmaid or Best Man dress from a different designer in a different fabric (silk dupioni).  One has ordered about a million different options and can’t find anything she likes – she’s been looking at department stores and Bridesmaid or Best Man dress designers (she’s thinking something in lace).  And the other intends to get a dress from a department store but hasn’t ordered yet (also lace).  I’m just a little worried about the last two because we are ~7 weeks out from the wedding and they tend to procastinate a lot, but I’m sure they’ll work it out.  Like PP’s said, I don’t like the monotonous matchy/matchy thing with the same dress, shoes, hair style, etc.  I think my girls appreciate having a little more freedom – they are grown adults and dress themselves appropriately every day…why should my wedding day be any different?  

Post # 15
Member
2168 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Same bouquet! Make it your own – lol ๐Ÿ™‚

 

 

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