(Closed) Lights ON or OFF during *ya know*

posted 7 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
Member
3758 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Well sadly our first time was not our honeymoon but the lights were on… It didn’t seem awkward though. I liked seeing all of him πŸ™‚ nakedness is nothing you should be embarrased about with your spouse lol you will be married, and he will like your body (basically guarunteed) and you will see eachother eventually why not in the beginning. “And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” comes to mind πŸ™‚ 

Post # 5
Member
3758 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@MuchGreater: You seem like the person who would appreciate a bible verse πŸ™‚

Post # 6
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think soft lighting is a must, especially for first-timers. There is all the excitement and nervousness already, darkness isn’t going to help you guide each other (and may even lead to much confusion/discomfort). Even the TV on for light (but candles are much more romantic and take all of 30 seconds to light) will help.

And as cyndistar3 pointed out, you and your husband will want to appreciate all of each other, no need for keeping the lights off πŸ™‚ 

Post # 7
Member
1314 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

Our first time was lights on and it wasn’t awkward at all. Fiance loves it with the lights on, but I’ve come to prefer them off (because I am self conscious!). I say do whatever you feel comfortable with in the moment. You might think you won’t be nervous or self conscious but then it comes to THAT moment and you all of a sudden feel differently. You can always try it with lights on later too, so it’s not a huge deal, IMO. πŸ™‚

Post # 8
Member
3639 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Darkness would be bad, as would candlelight – you don’t want to be thinking about open flames when concentrating on other things!

BUT if you are staying in a hotel, chances are they will have light dimmers. It is actually nice to be able to see his face and whole body. It’s far too clumsy in darkness and you’ll probably feel more awkward. You might be a little shy at first with the lights on but in the end it will be better. 

Post # 9
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I suggest darkness with faint candlelight.. πŸ™‚

Post # 10
Member
3639 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@MrsPinkBONBON: Candles are bad! Sooo many things can go wrong if you are distracted. You can get fake candles though, they are battery operated. 

 

Oooh, it would be cool if you could decorate the room with fairy lights. 

Post # 11
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Another point is that when you are experiencing your first time, it’s nice to see where things are and where they should be going.  It was his first time as well, so we were both figuring out how best to do things.  lol  I took the time to explore his body and he did the same with mine.  It was really nice to be able to see his face and his reactions to what I was doing – it helped guide me in what he liked and what did nothing for him or what he disliked.  

Post # 12
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@Everdeen: lol I’m pretty sure candels would be fine considering first time’s usually don’t last that long. Besides it’s not like they wouldn’t be in a container away from anything flammable. Not really a big deal in my opinion.

I still say candelight is the BEST way. You get to see the outline of your partners body if your self conscious. It makes it easier and more romantic in my opinion.

Post # 13
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Darling Husband and I have never been shy with lights on from the very beginning. I dont really care if the lights are on or off. It makes no difference. Anyways – if you are going to have daytime honeymoon sex then the lights will be on because it will be light out! Its no big deal!

Post # 14
Member
2496 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

I say lights on as well!!  We waited till our honeymoon and we had all the lights on because it’s hard enough figuring out where everything’s going and what you’re doing if the lights are off.  Plus, it’s great to see his face and reactions and I can guarantee he will want to see yours.  That’s Darling Husband favorite part about sex!

Post # 15
Member
6351 posts
Bee Keeper

Candlelight. Its perfect. Hides what you want but you can still see each other’s faces.

Post # 16
Member
485 posts
Helper bee

IMO, sex with the lights off is very unromantic and a bit boring.

I like being able to see SO while we’re doing it, it’s part of the intimacy.

The topic ‘Lights ON or OFF during *ya know*’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors