(Closed) List his parents on invite?

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
10846 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

If you’re having a formally worded invite, then yes, I’d list them regardless of how much they’ve contributed. If you’re not comfortable with it, don’t list any parents and just say something like “Together with our families”.

Post # 4
8735 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Meghan320: My parents are paying for the whole wedding.

FI’s dad is paying for the rehearsal dinner and FI’s mom is paying for the day after brunch.

Only my parent’s names were on the invite.

However we did ask FI’s parents how they felt about it. It didn’t matter to them either way so we went with etiquette and put just my parent’s names on because they are “hosting” (paying for) the entire wedding.

Post # 5
6887 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If your Fiance parents are helping pay for part of your wedding then yes they should be included on the invite.

Post # 6
5089 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

The way you have it phrased is good – it includes them, but it does not suggest that they are hosting the event (since it’s only your parents who are listed as doing the inviting).

I think you should include them. It doesn’t hurt, and why risk hurting their feelings this early in the relationship?

Post # 9
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

View original reply
@mightywombat: Also agreed. That’s exactly how we phrased ours.

Post # 10
3563 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I would put them on the invitation, just as you wrote in your post. It’s just not worth starting a battle over, you know? We had both sets of parents on our invitation

Post # 12
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

We didn’t put my in-laws on the invite.  They didn’t contribute to the wedding and traditionally the parents of the groom are not listed.  It’s a nice gesture, but certainly not necessary if they aren’t contributing to the actual wedding.  If you are really against putting them on there, then don’t.  (Unless your fiance really wants their names on there, in which case I think you should do it for him).  My in-laws hosted our rehearsal dinner so their names were on that invitation.

Post # 13
8735 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

View original reply
@Meghan320: Why don’t you want to put them on?

I actually suggested we put my FI’s parents on but they declined since they are not contributing to the wedding.

If you list your Fiance as “son of mr and mrs x” you aren’t implying that they are paying.

Have you asked them what they want? Or asked your Fiance his opinion?

Post # 14
1077 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I see wedding invitations as the announcement of the union of two families in most cases.  It shouldn’t be about money although they are spending more on you than some girls whole budget, even though they might not seem that psyched or interested to you.  Leaving them off of this announcement would really start your marriage off on the wrong foot, IMO.

Post # 15
827 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

This is how I think you should word it:

Mr and Mrs Meghan320 request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter



Mr. Boyfriend

Son of Mr and Mrs Boyfriend

In my opinion, wording it this way will get the point across that your parents are paying for the wedding… but it also acknowledges the parents of the groom.

Post # 16
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My parents paid for everything except for the transportation and rehearsal dinner, but we put both parents’ names on the invite.  I think it’s nice to include them, and my parents were fine with ‘sharing the spotlight’. 

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