(Closed) Little kids at wedding problems and bigger serious food allergy issues

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
Post # 17
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

We had a ton of kids at our wedding and not ONE made a peep during our ceremony. I think this is everyones fear but in reality I don’t think they interrupt as much as people think or we really lucked out. With that being said ours was short and sweet and outside.

As for the allergy you def can’t expect parents to go get Girlfriend foods. You could however ask that they bring fruits or something kid friendly as a suggestion? OR you could provide some snacks? I’m not sure how to work around that. We have allergies but not a deadly one. Sorry bee!

Post # 18
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

For your allergy I would definitely reach out to the parents of children with toddlers and such and say sort of if your bringing snacks because “little darling” might get peckish or not like the adult food your perfectly welcome to do that the only issue is I have a very serious gluten allergy that could land me in hospital. Could you possibly bring snacks that don’t contain gluten so there is no risk of me coming in contact with it? 

99.9% of people will not be insulted and will understand. I’d say there is a good chance parents of young kids will bring food for them especially if they are at all fussy and then it isn’t just the risk of them touching food but also crumbs everywhere sound like they would be a problem for you. So best just to say no glutenat all from the start. 

Post # 19
876 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

I have no real advice about the food allergy thing, BUT as far as the kids thing goes—uninvited screaming kids was my WORST fear. Our ushers knew that at first wail to nicely show parents to the viewing room at the church.

Post # 20
30388 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Unfortunately, there are parents who will sit and pretend that they don’t notice their children misbehaving. Although there is no polite way to ask them to monitor their children’s behavior, you can include a line on a separate insert that tells them where they can take their children if they are upset or unable to sit quietly.  Many churches have a viewing room where the parents can still see and hear the ceremony. If your venue doesn’t have that, ask what they do have available for parents.

Post # 21
2979 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

TBH this first one is one of the reasons I’m not having kids lol (at the wedding). I HAVE been to weddings where children are shrieking through the ceremony and/or reception. Ive been to weddings where a child threw a tantrum at the reception and threw plates of food on the floor. Yes, parents should know to mind their kids, but sometimes they dont, sometimes they think the child is minded when hes still upset, and sometimes it happens quickly that they dont have time to stop. I didnt want that at my wedding.

As for your allergy, I dont know whats best. If you write ‘gluten free’ people will just assume thats talking about your food. Id probably try to spread it by word of mouth. Tell FIs mom to let any guests with kids know that you have a serious allergy.

Post # 22
3089 posts
Sugar bee

As far as the gluten/wheat allergy…  say, 5 or 10 kids are at your wedding and they all open one of those little snack-size, hermetically sealed packages of goldfish crackers or something similar.  Would that be enough to trigger your allergy? (airborne particles).  

You might also need to spell out things like.. oh, playdough.  Lots of people with small kids carry playdough to amuse the kids during events the kids might find boring, and playdough isn’t gluten free.

(I don’t have a gluten allergy but I do have a life threatening food allergy. Our house always does the turquoise pumpkin thing on Halloween and has allergy-safe alternatives for trick-or-treaters. I’m always surprised by how many people don’t know about playdough.)


Post # 23
6119 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
littlecats :  Issue#1 – Everyone worries about this and we had literally zero problem. I bought little gifts for the kids and it went over well. However… on to issue #2

Issue #2 – I have deathly allergies as well, but they are not airborne allergens. However, I’m sure if I inhaled peanut or tree nut dust it would equal anaphalaxis disaster. It is for this reason that I would recommend you going child free. A wheat allergy especially airborne is dangerous and you really don’t want to risk your health. But if that’s not an option there are many other ways you can go about mitigating the risk. Also I had to think about the daily risks and what I do to mitigate that (i.e. friends houses and restaurants). I took it up a notch to be sure I could enjoy our wedding day.

What we did first was find a wedding venue with a safe kitchen (I made sure that they understood and followed allergy protocols). It also helps that they had catered to almost every allergen on the planet before too.  NO ONE was to be served anything containing my allergen at the wedding We figured people could stand no nuts for one night. So, none in the food, none at the bar, etc.

Also if your allergen is airborne you might want to start spreading the word to FI’s side. My husbands entire family knows about my allergy.

We also bought a cake from a specialty bakery allergen friendly so I knew no cross-contamination would happen. Hope this helps!!


Side note – One of our guests had horrible allergies to DAIRY and WHEAT, which was in some of the dishes, and they were able to provied her with a safe meal as well and she felt safe and comfortable eating there as well.

Post # 24
1519 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

If I read ‘gluten allergy’ on the wedding invite I’d take it very seriously, but my mum and several of my relatives have coeliac disease so I know how severe it can be, and how a lot of people are not just off gluten because it’s trendy (I have run into a few of those though). Regarding your allergy I would speak to the caterers and ensure your food is served and stored separately.

With the kids making noise – it comes down to how well you know your friends and family and their parenting. Do you trust that they’d have the common sense to remove a crying baby or misbehaving toddler? If yes, I don’t think you need to worry. If not, perhaps consider a child free wedding if it is causing you stress.


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