(Closed) Living away from home and getting married In another country

posted 7 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
Member
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Yep, hello! πŸ™‚

I moved to Ireland from the USA to be with and marry my Darling Husband. Two friends did manage to make the journey, and my two uncles surprised me but my parents and several close friends could not make it. I did most of my wedding planning with my Darling Husband and MIL!! Including dress shopping!

It’s definitely hard and it is going to get harder! You have an ex pat bee friend in me! You’re not alone!

Post # 5
Member
456 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

been there, done that..  I’m still in the process of planning my wedding but yeah, I know how much it sucks.   my side of the guest list looks so empty because only a handful of people will be able to make it over but we’re planning on having a 2nd reception back home sometime after which is helping somewhat. 

Post # 6
Member
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@aussie_norway: He actually got two and I never really got one! πŸ˜› He was on tour and they ended it early in Cork and held it there but some of his closest friends couldn’t afford the trip from Belfast. So when he was home, they threw him a BBQ (though girls were allowed, including me, and we announced it would also be my hen do) and we all went out together but it wasn’t anything fancy. Just our bi-monthly metal night and a friend’s Halloween party. I was okay with it though, and the friends I’ve gotten close to here say they’re gonna throw me one in the future, haha, which doesn’t make much sense! My bridesmaids I picked over here are all scattered over the British Isles so getting anything organized was really just too much to ask!

We are planning a second reception too, including a “mock wedding” where we’ll do a walk down an aisle and vows again with a friend as a “priest”, back home for me in the States so my friends and family can be there. It will be a much less expensive and formal ordeal (outdoor summer BYOB and BYOM BBQ kinda thing). Knowing that’s still ahead does help a little with how few were able to make it for the wedding.

Post # 8
Member
456 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

is your Fiance planning the wedding? 

Post # 10
Member
456 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

oh, that doesn’t sound good.  πŸ™  are you tied into going with those vendors or can you still talk with him about it?  maybe try and find some alternatives that you guys could look into? 

Post # 11
Member
891 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I have been living my whole adult life Sweden, all my relatives are in the Philippines except my dad’s, they are Swedish don’t know them very well. Getting married in Norway (FI is Norse). Currently living in Ireland. Not very big distances, but big enough to miss out on stuff that you usually do when planning a wedding. I have had to try out my wedding dresses alone as well and I still need to try a few more. Basically not being able to share this wedding planninng with anyone is pretty.. tough. You get used to it. I do understand you, and it’s not easy.

 

 

Post # 13
Member
741 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Ahhhh I was just debating if I should start a post on this – Yes I’m in the same situation! Fiance and I live in Paris, and will be getting married in Normandy at his parents house. I’m from California, so my mom/sister/friends can’t come with me, and my best friend who lives in the south of France is coming up in January for a few days to go wedding shopping with me, but I’ll need to choose my dress before that. I have a few expat friends, but in Paris people come and go so often that I haven’t had many stable friendships. There is a “salon du marriage” tomorrow where I will try on dresses, but I’ll probably go alone (I may try to go with my FI’s grandma/mom/sister which would be fun to do, but I know they have very different styles than myself). Pardon my emo moment, but I feel so depressed and alone concerning the situation. I’m so jealous of some of the bees who are just annoyed their BMs showed up late or couldn’t make it to some of the prewedding stuff – if my friends can manage just to make it to my wedding and figure out how to use a hairdryer without blowing out the voltage, I’ll be thrilled. 

I love my Fiance and his family and I’m so grateful for what they are doing for our wedding, but I have started missing my own family and friends a lot more throughout the planning process….

 

Post # 15
Member
741 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@aussie_norway: Thank you, I hope it gets easier for you as well. Idk, I’ve been living in Paris for a few years now so not having my close friends and family around is nothing new, but the wedding definitely brings all those feelings back to the surface! I think I’ll still try to recruit people to go shopping with me that I normally might not; it’s a good olive branch at least, but it’s still hard not to go through this with those closer to you. And no, you are not a loser whatsoever – you are not only committing your life to someone you love, but you are already showing your are willing to put the other person before yourself. Maybe try talking to your Fiance and tell him how you feel, and maybe try to find a way which will connect you more to this whole thing. (I hope you are at least going on an awesome honeymoon, I think you deserve it!)

At least when this is all over, we’ll be married πŸ™‚ 

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