(Closed) Lonely Bee…Friendships after Engagement

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
239 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’m right with you! When I was younger I was the boy crazy party crazy girl with a bunch of friends. Then when I was 26 I moved to NYC on my own without knowing anyone.  The 2nd day in NYC I met my now fiance. We’ve been inseparable ever since. I’m 32 now. Lets just say  I have’t really met any close female friends while I’ve lived in NYC.  It’s really hard! Especially when you don’t have that boy crazy stuff to bond over.  So, I just wanted to let you know you’re not alone!

Post # 5
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I can definitely relate to the lonely feeling.  I wasn’t necessarily the boy crazy one, but always the one in a relationship when it came to my group of friends (I’ve been dating my fiance for 8 years now and I’m 23).  They’re the ones who are still out doing single things and I came to the realization that while we’re still friends, we have less of a lifestyle in common now.  I agree with you and wouldn’t change a thing about my situation.  I think the thing that makes me feel better is knowing that it’s just a change in the stages of my life and eventually I will find more friends I can relate to in my married life.  I’m just trying to focus more of my energy on enjoying being engaged and building up to our married life.  I’ve never been good with change, but here’s to the best of luck for us!

Post # 6
Member
6359 posts
Bee Keeper

You could just spend more time listening to their stories and plotting fun antics for their lives 🙂 I love to hear my friends’ fun stories, even though my life is different.

Plus sometimes I tell an “oldie but a goodie” from my past that their present situation reminds me about.

I wouldn’t say my life is boring now and I never have any stories to tell, especially about other aspects of my life (friends, family, work, activism, volunteering, hobbies, etc) but sometimes it’s one of those “no news is good news” things about the relationship. But really it’s not like other people get bored of hearing themselves talk, as long as you’re a good and active listener 🙂

Post # 7
Member
1074 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Yeah, all of my girlfriends are single except one. She’s married. When I want girl time, we go shopping together because our boys hate shopping and we love it and we talk about our lives and all the things that come after the boy-crazy faze.

See if you can find some couple friends. Friends that will be good to hang out with or without you SO.

Honestly.

If you haven’t seen the episode of How I Met Your Mother where Lily and Marshall go looking for couple friends, you should watch it. It describes how we married/engaged/ commited people feel.

 

Post # 8
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@JackiBean:  I love HIMYM! That is such a relatable episode 🙂

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