- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
I’m getting married soon (July in Maine), and so is my friend (June in Florida). She asked me to be her bridesmaid, and I hesitated to accept. I called her and explained that, while I was flattered, I didn’t think I could be the kind of bridesmaid she deserved. I explained that with money being tight with my own wedding, I wouldn’t be able to attend the other events if they were spread too far out from the wedding (in this case, the shower and bachelorette are two weeks apart in May). She told me that all I would need to do is arrive to the wedding, help her get ready, and stand by her side, so I agreed to be a bridesmaid for her.
Lately, she’s been dropping hints that she really wants me to be at her other wedding events, and has even offered to pay for my flight to her bachelorette weekend. There are 6 other bridesmaids (they’ve all confirmed they are going to the bachlorette, I’d be the only one missing) who also need to fly in for her bachelorette. I’m grateful that she offered to pay, but I know for a fact (her sis/MOH, who I’ve become closer to, accidentally mentioned it) that money is tight for her as well. It’s also an issue of pride for me; I would feel awful letting her pay, and would probably feel guilty during the party as well. Even tougher is that she would probably be really offended if I didn’t attend AND rejected her offer to pay. I want to be there for her, should I just bite the bullet and go to her bachelorette? Or “stick to my guns” and tell her that I can’t swing the cost on my own and can’t accept her offer.
The weekend would be about $550, which is not an unreasonable amount usually, but right now it kind of is, since it would come from my wedding fund. (On a side note, she asked us to wear as BMs short floral dresses that we already owned, so I didn’t have to worry about that cost.)
What would you do in this situation?