(Closed) Long Distance Family and the Wedding

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 2
6907 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Are you paying for your wedding?  If so, they have no say in where you choose to do it.  my family lives 2000 miles away from me and my husband’s lives 900 miles away.  We didn’t think it was fair to “make” everyone from just one side fly to the other, so we just held the wedding in our own area and made everyone suffer   sorry your family is complaining, but what you chose to do sounds pretty logical to me.  Them saying they won’t have a shower is just passive-aggressive and you should ignore it.  You don’t need a shower and probably someone else will throw you one anyway if they want to.  I didn’t get one and while I love getting presents like the selfish pig I am, it wasn’t really a big deal. 

If your roommates are throwing a shower, they should only invite people you have invited to your wedding.  Just give them a list of people you’d like to see if they’re able to make it.  Maybe they can even set up a Facetime/Skype session for part of the shower to chat with those back home. 

Post # 3
537 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

That just seems very petty. Maybe they’d be happy if you had a second reception in your home state? Even if that doesn’t help (or you don’t have the money), I don’t see why your mom & grandmother (unless health is really bad) can’t make a 3 hour trip for your WEDDING!!! It’s not like you get married every day. Plus, the fact that 90% of your guests live in the state you’re having the wedding in makes complete sense!

Try explaining them the reasons: most guests live there, maybe it’s cheaper?, it’s easier on you so you’re not planning a long distance wedding, etc. If they still don’t come around, let them be & enjoy your day.

For the shower, invite every lady that’s invited to the wedding. Let them choose to make the trip or not. But don’t exclude them just because of distance. Some may be willing to travel.

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